Bobby_F Posted August 8, 2014 Share Posted August 8, 2014 (edited) Love the Mash: http://www.thedailymash.co.uk/sport/sport-headlines/celtic-award-bullshit-goals-to-fictional-player-2014080889421 "CELTIC has invented a fictional hero to take credit for the three goals it never scored. The club was awarded a completely made-up 3-0 Champions League qualifying victory over Legia Warsaw after the Polish team accidentally fielded an invincible football robot for two minutes of injury time. Now the Glasgow club has honoured the achievement by awarding the goals to the fictional attacking midfielder, Declan Sanchez. A club spokesman said: “Declan is a working class boy from Galway whose grandfather was an Argentinian human rights activist and a close friend of Che Guevara. “Declan joined Celtic at the age of seven after being spotted by Kenny Dalglish, adopted by Charlie Nicholas and trained by Henrik Larsson. When he is not creating and scoring magnificent goals he writes poetry about imperialist oppression. “And he has the voice of an angel.”" Got the Celtic-psyche spot on. Edited August 8, 2014 by Bobby_F 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
killie_lad Posted August 8, 2014 Share Posted August 8, 2014 Dhenbhoy is actually bragging about this 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Venti Posted August 8, 2014 Share Posted August 8, 2014 Wonder if Declan Sanchez can cure depression as well. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
forever_blue Posted August 8, 2014 Share Posted August 8, 2014 Wonder if Declan Sanchez can cure depression as well. his other granda was palestinian aswell i believe 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bobby_F Posted August 8, 2014 Share Posted August 8, 2014 Actually, the Mash missed something. Not only did Declan score a hat trick (that in itself would have seen Celtic still knocked out), he made two spectacular last ditch goal line clearances to ensure the Celts kept a clean sheet. What a find! 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chipper Posted August 8, 2014 Share Posted August 8, 2014 get it up ye's!!! buzzing!! champions league here we come! 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bing (2) Posted August 8, 2014 Share Posted August 8, 2014 his other granda was palestinian aswell i believe I thought you'd be delighted fb ? After all, rangers are now gonna be showing drive in movies at the Albion Car Park, they 'might' also show our CL games https://twitter.com/Graeme_Macphers/status/497699504314130432 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TheLip69 Posted August 8, 2014 Share Posted August 8, 2014 You could argue that Aberdeen and St Johnstone were up against better quality sides than Celtic faced, they were definitely no worse than Legia. Yet, while Celtic meekly surrendered, both Saints and the Dandies went down fighting. Even Motherwell, who went out in the first round gave a better showing scoring twice in each leg before going behind for the first time in the tie in extra-time to a team already a quarter of the way through it's season. There was no heart, no passion, and very little skill from Celtic in either leg of their tie with Legia. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chipper Posted August 8, 2014 Share Posted August 8, 2014 You could argue that Aberdeen and St Johnstone were up against better quality sides than Celtic faced, they were definitely no worse than Legia. Yet, while Celtic meekly surrendered, both Saints and the Dandies went down fighting. Even Motherwell, who went out in the first round gave a better showing scoring twice in each leg before going behind for the first time in the tie in extra-time to a team already a quarter of the way through it's season. There was no heart, no passion, and very little skill from Celtic in either leg of their tie with Legia. 1/10 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
thisal Posted August 8, 2014 Share Posted August 8, 2014 You could argue that Aberdeen and St Johnstone were up against better quality sides than Celtic faced, they were definitely no worse than Legia. Yet, while Celtic meekly surrendered, both Saints and the Dandies went down fighting. Even Motherwell, who went out in the first round gave a better showing scoring twice in each leg before going behind for the first time in the tie in extra-time to a team already a quarter of the way through it's season. There was no heart, no passion, and very little skill from Celtic in either leg of their tie with Legia. I can see your point re St J and Aberdeen, but Motherwell in both legs were atrocious. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Staggie52 Posted August 8, 2014 Share Posted August 8, 2014 Is this good for our coefficient? 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Drooper Posted August 8, 2014 Share Posted August 8, 2014 Will there be a minute silence at the next match at Celtic Park in memory of Celtic's credibility? 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
craigkillie Posted August 8, 2014 Share Posted August 8, 2014 Hilarious to see "TheLip69" trying to paint Motherwell's defeat to a part-time Icelandic side as anything other than a complete humiliation. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Drooper Posted August 8, 2014 Share Posted August 8, 2014 I'm hearing that Oscar Pistorious has sacked his lawyer and hired Celtic to be his legal team. They lost both legs and still managed to win. [apologies for this, it has no doubt already been posted, but I can't be arsed reading the entire thread] 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bing (2) Posted August 8, 2014 Share Posted August 8, 2014 I'm hearing that Oscar Pistorious has sacked his lawyer and hired Celtic to be his legal team.They lost both legs and still managed to win.[apologies for this, it has no doubt already been posted, but I can't be arsed reading the entire thread] Pistorius lawyer also represents Dave King... 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Drew Brees Posted August 8, 2014 Share Posted August 8, 2014 At least Celtic will still have the plate on which Legia handed them their arses. They can use that for the Maribor games. Why would Legia give their arses to Celtic? 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Crùbag Posted August 8, 2014 Share Posted August 8, 2014 The powers that be come to Celtic's aid again. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
glenrothes 1884 saint Posted August 8, 2014 Share Posted August 8, 2014 Good for spfl clubs, if Celtic reach the group stages, there's a million £ shared between the premiership teams, so I hope they progress, however fortunate they've been 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chipper Posted August 8, 2014 Share Posted August 8, 2014 The powers that be come to Celtic's aid again. You lost lower league boy? 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
forever_blue Posted August 8, 2014 Share Posted August 8, 2014 Will there be a minute silence at the next match at Celtic Park in memory of Celtic's credibility? candles and prayers 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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