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The Simpsons best bits


deadasdillinger

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My favourite episodes are the one with the plant softball team where they get all the MLB ringers (the sideburns scene mentioned earlier is a classic) and the one where Mr Burns opens the casino. Mr Burns is definitely the best character.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eqnXYXmAXq0

I physically can't watch new simpsons. Homer is mentally retarded nowadays - like he can't do basic human functions. He used to be just a below average intelligence guy struggling through life. It made it funnier because it was easier to relate to. The eyes are also too small now IMO.

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Re: simpsons not being as good as it was - have a read through this: http://deadhomersociety.com/zombiesimpsons/

Well worth a look.

As it is - I mean the list is endless.

Hank Scorpio - the newspaper headline "SUPERVILLAIN SEIZES EAST COAST" still gets me at the end of that episode.

Mulder and Scully's appearance; "I bring you love!" "It's bringing us love! Kill it!" - Moe. In fact, most parts involving Moe in the early years were great.

Steamed hams!

Nary a creature alive can outrun a greased scotsman!

FEELS LIKE I'M WEARIN' NOTHIN' AT ALL! NOTHIN' AT ALL! NOTHIN' AT ALL!

Now I can combine my love of helping people with my love of hurting people!

Loneliness and cheeseburgers are a dangerous mix...

Etc.

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Re: simpsons not being as good as it was - have a read through this: http://deadhomersociety.com/zombiesimpsons/

Well worth a look.

As it is - I mean the list is endless.

Hank Scorpio - the newspaper headline "SUPERVILLAIN SEIZES EAST COAST" still gets me at the end of that episode.

Mulder and Scully's appearance; "I bring you love!" "It's bringing us love! Kill it!" - Moe. In fact, most parts involving Moe in the early years were great.

Steamed hams!

Nary a creature alive can outrun a greased scotsman!

FEELS LIKE I'M WEARIN' NOTHIN' AT ALL! NOTHIN' AT ALL! NOTHIN' AT ALL!

Now I can combine my love of helping people with my love of hurting people!

Loneliness and cheeseburgers are a dangerous mix...

Etc.

That's a pretty good site...basically just wasted all day at work reading it.

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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TOx09eKybDg


ujDhP.jpg

I'm on a road. Uh, looks to be asphalt...oh, geez, trees, shrubs...er, I'm directly under the earth's sun...now!

526915_426119677477509_1505095850_n.png

Homer: I always just figured my wife was my soul mate. But if it’s not Marge, then who is it? Where do I begin looking?

Furniture Salesman: This really goes beyond my training as a furniture salesman, sir. Now, if you don’t want the sofa I’ll have to ask you to leave.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5izm9kHeHkg

"Stealing? How could you?! Haven't you learned anything from that guy who gives those sermons at church? Captain Whatshisname? We live in a society of laws. Why do you think I took you to all those Police Academy movies? For fun? Well, I didn't hear anybody laughing! Did you?! Except at that guy who made sound effects [Homer makes some and laughs to himself] Where was I? Oh yeah: stay out of my booze."



553287_428236293932514_1637131893_n.jpg

Hibbert: Now I'm going to do a fat analysis test. I'll start your jiggling and measure how long it takes to stop.

Homer: Woo hoo! Look at that blubber fly!

Hibbert: Yes. Nurse, cancel my 1:00.



7947_427822167307260_733038557_n.jpg

Burns: It was the best of times, it was the BLURST of times?! YOU STUPID MONKEY!



733980_426977900725020_2033540460_n.jpg

Welcome to Lee Carvallo's Putting Challenge. I am Carvallo. Now, choose a club. You have chosen a three wood. May I suggest a putter? Three wood. Now enter the force of your swing. I suggest feather touch. You have entered "power drive". Now, push seven eight seven to swing."
"Ball is in....parking lot. Would you like to play again? You have selected, "No.”





Edited by deadasdillinger
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Dental plan...Lisa needs braces...Dental plan...Lisa needs braces....Dental plan....Lisa needs braces.

WHEN DO WE GET THE FREAKIN GUNS.......im not giving you anything till you tell me your name.....I'VE HAD IT UP TO HERE WITH YOU "RU-ELZ".

Eat the pudding Eat the pudding Eat the pudding.

And a million others

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Homer shows off one of his inventions.)
Homer: Now, here's my everything's okay alarm!
(Alarm beeps loudly)
Homer: (Shouting) This will sound--
(Alarm beeps loudly)
Homer: --every three seconds--
(Alarm beeps loudly)
Homer: --unless something isn't okay!
(Alarm beeps loudly)
Marge: (Shouting) Turn that off, Homer!
(Alarm beeps loudly)
Homer: (Shouting) It can't be turned off!

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Homer: Now, this next one's for the ladies.
How many times have you gals been late for a high-powered business meeting,
only to realize you're not wearing make-up?

Marge: That's every woman's nightmare.

Homer: That's why I invented this revolutionary make-up gun.
It's for the woman who only has four-fifths of a second to get ready.
Close your eyes, Marge.
[Homer fires the make-up gun, which appears to be a shotgun with some containers of liquid attached,
into Marge's face.
After the cloud of dust vanishes, she ends up with way too much on]

Homer: Now you're ready for a night on the town. [holds up a mirror]

Marge: [gasps] Homer! You've got it set on "whore".

Homer: Okay, this time try to keep your nostrils closed.
[Homer points the gun at her, but she pushes it away from her face.
A vaguely face-shaped blotch of make-up stains the wall]

Homer: Oh, look what you did. Now I have to go get my cold-cream gun.

Lisa: Dad, women won't like being shot in the face.

Homer: Women will like what I tell them to like!

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Homer: Oh, Lord! Why do You mock me? (looking up at ceiling). Marge: Homer, that’s not God. That’s a waffle Bart stuck to the ceiling. (Marge pries the waffle off the ceiling). Homer: Lord, I know I shouldn’t eat Thee, but… (munch munch munch) mmmm…sacrelicious.

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