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I'm not actually moving up there sadly, although I wouldn't rule it in the future. I'm looking to move to Aberdeen early next year, but after that who knows.

I genuinely would be up for a night out in Dundee mind!

As Matty said you're guaranteed some fun :ph34r:

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2 things from previous posts (still can't quote or copy.....does someone not loke me?)

Only medication I ever had was low dose sertraline, even taking that before bedtime I'd sleep 12 hours at least, so we stopped that.

Re suicide: never been to that dark place myself, but having seen wife no 2 try 3 times (all overdoses), twice ended up in hospital, last time.........

It must be a really awful place to be, I can only say tell someone.

If someone does tell you they're thinking about it take it seriously. I still blame myself, but as she told the psych at the hospital after attempt no2 "If I'm going to do it I'll find a way even if you take all my meds away..."

Anyway, I'm doing better after last weeks collapse, and have made better plans for Christmas so I don't end up back alone in a big empty house with too many thoughts and any booze!

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I genuinely would be up for a night out in Dundee mind!

Mind and not tell the bouncers you're only 17 this time ;).

Denied entry to after dark, so Mardi it was. What a first night in halls!

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Apologies for messed up posts above. My wife has had problems with depression for years which stems from childhood abuse. I have been with her 16 years and in that time it has got worse and worse.

She can be the most amazing person in the world most of the time, but when she is bad it's hellish to live with.

Shortly after our first was born (late 1999), she had been off the meds for a while, but was getting stressed a lot. I came home from work one day and she hadn't got out of bed and the baby was screaming in her cot, hadn't been fed or changed all day. I gave up work and we lost everything, but it was worth it as she got better and the baby got looked after. After our second it was a lot better for a few years, but she got very self consious and sex was non exsistant for years. No big deal really; she was fine apart from that, but she started accusing me of sleeping with her friends because I wasn't getting any at home, which was totally untrue and extremely hurtful, but we got through it.

We had bouts of it again off and on for years and it was getting harder to live with the constant accusations of cheating and always arguing, but I wasn't going to leave the kids again so I stuck it out.

It's been a long road, and she seems to have been better recently, but this Christmas is going to be hard. We are really toiling for money this year and the kids deserve a good Christmas. I'm getting really close to the limit financially and the strain of trying to keep things ticking as well as having to do things like tidying the house and cooking the kids tea after a long day at work are having a big effect on me now. There are days I have to park the car up and just have a half an hour to chill out and get ready for the stress of going home. I don't know how much longer I can keep doing it like this, but my main concern is the kids. If I don't act normally around them it will spoil their Xmas and I can't find any enthusiasm in myself about it. If I say anything to her about it she will go away into herself again and it will spoil Xmas. I feel like I'm going to explode most of the time and now I can barely hold it in, and that makes me even worse. All my mates are noticing my moods now too and I am a mess at work, making stupid mistakes and not concentrating. I can see all the signs of depression developing in myself but I can't let it. If I get through the month then it will get easier, but I've not been able to talk to anyone about it until I found this thread. Sorry for the rant

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Mind and not tell the bouncers you're only 17 this time ;)

Denied entry to after dark, so Mardi it was. What a first night in halls!

Ha! What a schoolboy error that was! The first of many

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So poignant and inspiring to read through this thread.

Respect to each and every one of you. Best wishes.

Weird, I was just thinking that as I read the last few pages and then I scrolled down to yours.

I've never been depressed but close family members have (being related to me might be a factor) and the overwhelming feeling I can recall is of being helpless to help.

As Davis says, best wishes to everyone.

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Apologies for messed up posts above. My wife has had problems with depression for years which stems from childhood abuse. I have been with her 16 years and in that time it has got worse and worse.

She can be the most amazing person in the world most of the time, but when she is bad it's hellish to live with.

Shortly after our first was born (late 1999), she had been off the meds for a while, but was getting stressed a lot. I came home from work one day and she hadn't got out of bed and the baby was screaming in her cot, hadn't been fed or changed all day. I gave up work and we lost everything, but it was worth it as she got better and the baby got looked after. After our second it was a lot better for a few years, but she got very self consious and sex was non exsistant for years. No big deal really; she was fine apart from that, but she started accusing me of sleeping with her friends because I wasn't getting any at home, which was totally untrue and extremely hurtful, but we got through it.

We had bouts of it again off and on for years and it was getting harder to live with the constant accusations of cheating and always arguing, but I wasn't going to leave the kids again so I stuck it out.

It's been a long road, and she seems to have been better recently, but this Christmas is going to be hard. We are really toiling for money this year and the kids deserve a good Christmas. I'm getting really close to the limit financially and the strain of trying to keep things ticking as well as having to do things like tidying the house and cooking the kids tea after a long day at work are having a big effect on me now. There are days I have to park the car up and just have a half an hour to chill out and get ready for the stress of going home. I don't know how much longer I can keep doing it like this, but my main concern is the kids. If I don't act normally around them it will spoil their Xmas and I can't find any enthusiasm in myself about it. If I say anything to her about it she will go away into herself again and it will spoil Xmas. I feel like I'm going to explode most of the time and now I can barely hold it in, and that makes me even worse. All my mates are noticing my moods now too and I am a mess at work, making stupid mistakes and not concentrating. I can see all the signs of depression developing in myself but I can't let it. If I get through the month then it will get easier, but I've not been able to talk to anyone about it until I found this thread. Sorry for the rant

It's not a rant, it's catharsis. It won't help you to keep these things bottled up.

When you talk to your wife, do you tell her what you want from/for her or do you ask her if there's anything you could do to help her? Sorry if that sounds like a patronising question but the difference between the two things is massive and the way you've said "if I say anything to her" makes me wonder if there's another way you could talk to her that could be more beneficial. Your wife's situation sounds very similar to mine so if there's anything you'd like to ask me or talk about, feel free.

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It's not a rant, it's catharsis. It won't help you to keep these things bottled up.

When you talk to your wife, do you tell her what you want from/for her or do you ask her if there's anything you could do to help her? Sorry if that sounds like a patronising question but the difference between the two things is massive and the way you've said "if I say anything to her" makes me wonder if there's another way you could talk to her that could be more beneficial. Your wife's situation sounds very similar to mine so if there's anything you'd like to ask me or talk about, feel free.

Thanks for the advice, but it's more how she would react. She has been in a happy place these last few weeks, and if I mention money problems or my feelings then it might knock her back and that's the last thing I want.

It's not patronising at all, no offence taken,maybe I do need to phrase my thoughts better when talking to her. It's just hard to always have to be the "strong one" to admit (even to myself) that I'm struggling to cope right now is probably a good thing. Just reading everyone else's stories made me think about things and putting my own thoughts into words has helped me organise my head a bit.

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Thanks for the advice, but it's more how she would react. She has been in a happy place these last few weeks, and if I mention money problems or my feelings then it might knock her back and that's the last thing I want.

It's not patronising at all, no offence taken,maybe I do need to phrase my thoughts better when talking to her. It's just hard to always have to be the "strong one" to admit (even to myself) that I'm struggling to cope right now is probably a good thing. Just reading everyone else's stories made me think about things and putting my own thoughts into words has helped me organise my head a bit.

Living with someone with a mental health issue is hard work and having a outlet will help. The offer's always open if you need it. Sometimes just getting things out is all you need. I hope things pick up for you soon.

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I've hit a bit of a low tonight. I don't even know what to say, just felt I had to post it in here to get it off my chest. I get this quite a lot, although in recent weeks/months I've realised that people I know irl will look down on you when you talk to them about your problems, so I'm posting this in here for just now. :(

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I've hit a bit of a low tonight. I don't even know what to say, just felt I had to post it in here to get it off my chest. I get this quite a lot, although in recent weeks/months I've realised that people I know irl will look down on you when you talk to them about your problems, so I'm posting this in here for just now. :(

What's up bud :(

I take back what i said earlier in the thread my ex hanging about with this another laddie :)

Edited by Isaiah Osbourne

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I've hit a bit of a low tonight. I don't even know what to say, just felt I had to post it in here to get it off my chest. I get this quite a lot, although in recent weeks/months I've realised that people I know irl will look down on you when you talk to them about your problems, so I'm posting this in here for just now. :(

I get that sometimes. PM me if you want.

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What's up bud :(

I take back what i said earlier in the thread my ex hanging about with this another laddie :)

Good to know mate :) It's exam stress really, I'm a bit lonely/socially excluded at the moment. Also my dad has had an accident so that's playing on my mind. Just not having a great semester.

I get that sometimes. PM me if you want.

I might well take you up on that offer pal

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Good to know mate :) It's exam stress really, I'm a bit lonely/socially excluded at the moment. Also my dad has had an accident so that's playing on my mind. Just not having a great semester.

I might well take you up on that offer pal

You can pm me if you want too bud. :)

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And then BANG!

Phonecall this morning from Scotland, my brother is in hospital and unlikely to live much longer

Then I find out my oldest girl here has been in a car accident, as far as I know she's ok, but car is wrecked.

Gimme a fucking break FFS.

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Just had a massive argument with my ex there :(

If anyone warns to hear about it ill add you all in a pm :(

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