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My dad suffers from it, and while its easy for me to say I don't have to put it with it because I don't live with him anymore, it's not that simple. I speak to him (and my mum) at least twice a week. I was really worried about him when my mum had cancer, but I sat him down and spoke to him and explained that If he went off the rails it wouldn't help matters and we all had to be strong.

If that worked, good, but most advice I've read indicates that the "pull yourself together" approach isn't ideal. People suffering from depression will often feel inadequate and guilty as it is.

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The worst thing of it all for me was my dad trying to commit suicide 8 years ago. My mum managed to get our next neighbour to stop him, thank god he did. I just froze. I wanted to kick the shit of him for even thinking about it, but lets face it, what would that have achieved??

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Thankfully I'm not depressed, but I have a question. This thing about some people having it because of situations in their life and some having it as an illness, how would someone know? If someone is suddenly depressed after the death of a close one or if someone is depressed for no obvious reason then it's clear, but surely it's not always that simple? Everyone has every day problems such as money, work stress, insecurities etc etc, if that all got on top of them how would they know if they have an illness or are depressed because of their lives? None of us can fully put into context how happy we should be, surely?

I don't know if this is relevant, but I think a problem in society which isn't addressed enough is the side effects of alcohol. I know more than one person who have had full on panic attacks at least partly related to alcohol, and we aren't talking about alcoholics here. It's a known fact that when we're pished our stress levels decrease, and as a result we're more anxious the next day. Add this to the fact that it makes us forget stuff and act like a twat, and it's a bad combo. I've been told I was talking embarrasing shite in the pub six days ago and I'm still stressing out about it, that's surely not healthy.

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However the chats that I had with my Doc made me feel a hellava lot better.

i haven't been offered any anti depressant, nor do I particularly want them tbh. The GP is a woman and very easy to talk to and has helped me turn a corner.

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I thought you hated swearing?

I do but no one is perfect as human nature is flawed but within the confines of preference, I hate swearing.

I also find you a bit creepy. Sorry about that biggrin.gif

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I also have a question/point. Would it be fair to say that most people who commit suicide (may or may not be due to depression) are those that generally don't open up or cry for help? It seems to me that if that is there mindset, they just go ahead and do it.

Who, apart from his counsellor(s), if he did speak to one (we'll never know) thought Gary Speed would do what he did?

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Thankfully I'm not depressed, but I have a question. This thing about some people having it because of situations in their life and some having it as an illness, how would someone know? If someone is suddenly depressed after the death of a close one or if someone is depressed for no obvious reason then it's clear, but surely it's not always that simple? Everyone has every day problems such as money, work stress, insecurities etc etc, if that all got on top of them how would they know if they have an illness or are depressed because of their lives? None of us can fully put into context how happy we should be, surely?

As I say I'm no expert on this, but it's certainly not simple as you say. I think the answer lies in your question as to how happy people should be. I think the condition is generally very far removed from how happy you are or not. I think if you are aware of what is depressing you, and you can rationalise it, then perhaps it's more environmental. If your condition is particularly acute and you don't recognise anything in your life that should be making you feel as you do maybe that's more chemical.

I don't know if this is relevant, but I think a problem in society which isn't addressed enough is the side effects of alcohol. I know more than one person who have had full on panic attacks at least partly related to alcohol, and we aren't talking about alcoholics here. It's a known fact that when we're pished our stress levels decrease, and as a result we're more anxious the next day. Add this to the fact that it makes us forget stuff and act like a twat, and it's a bad combo. I've been told I was talking embarrasing shite in the pub six days ago and I'm still stressing out about it, that's surely not healthy.

I think you're totally right here. I've had a hellish couple of years with the side-effects of alcohol. Really brutal hangovers that have left me struggling mentally and physically. The worst thing is I was drinking more to try and rid myself of the effects, which was in danger of creating a downward spiral. I had no idea what was happening to me for a long time, and didn't realise that sort of thing happened with alcohol - and I turned forty this year.

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I also have a question/point. Would it be fair to say that most people who commit suicide (may or may not be due to depression) are those that generally don't open up or cry for help? It seems to me that if that is there mindset, they just go ahead and do it.

Who, apart from his counsellor(s), if he did speak to one (we'll never know) thought Gary Speed would do what he did?

I wish people would stop using Gary Speed as an example. The coroner himself said there was insufficient evidence to say whether or not his death was accidental or deliberate. It could just as well have been a w**k that went wrong.

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I had a shitty time of it a few years ago, including an extended period off work, and a week in hospital immediately after my wife died. She was not the trigger, I was probably heading that way anyway, but the day she died the doc had me straight in (as a voluntary, so I couls leave if i wanted). After the week I genuinely did feel better, great help from NHS Highland, and I had a wonderful councillor (is that the right word) who I saw weekly, then fortnightly, then monthly, then "only if you need me".

It really, really did help me getting someone professional to talk to whilst going through the bad times, no judgement, no time-frame to "get better" and I was fortunate that apart from a mild sleeping tablet for a few weeks I didn't need medication. I am also now very lucky that I know the signs to look for in my own behaviour should I be on the way to a "relapse" and I should be able to get myself help before it gets to rock bottom like before. I'm aware that I will probably have this for the rest of my life, but it's not something I really think about these days, I just felt maybe putting my experiences on here might help someone else.

My symptoms to look for? (should anyone want to be on the lookout for similar warning signs)

Sleeplessness (not full-on insomnia); Lack of interest in TV/Reading/Internet/Sport; can't be bothered cooking so eating shite (and not really bothering much with that either tbh); slow but steady increase in alcohol intake 9not these days obviously); feeloing permanently tired; just wanting to "hide away" from the world; not really giving a shit about my appearance (again not to the extent of becoming a total tramp, but maybe I just never got that far) in terms of wearing any old clothes, not shaving etc.

Loke I say I was lucky to have a great NHS Doc and Psychiatrist at the time and I owe them a hell of a lot.

ETA: I never had, or have, suicidal thoughts, I guess one of the reasons I was "voluntary" admission to Newcraigs, i can't begin to imagine just how terrible that must feel. I am, however, more familiar with it than I'd like having lost my wife that way.

Edited by Raidernation

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My symptoms to look for? (should anyone want to be on the lookout for similar warning signs)

Sleeplessness (not full-on insomnia); Lack of interest in TV/Reading/Internet/Sport; can't be bothered cooking so eating shite (and not really bothering much with that either tbh); slow but steady increase in alcohol intake 9not these days obviously); feeloing permanently tired; just wanting to "hide away" from the world; not really giving a shit about my appearance (again not to the extent of becoming a total tramp, but maybe I just never got that far) in terms of wearing any old clothes, not shaving etc.

Uh-oh (although I do normally shave, yesterday being a very rare forgetful exception),

Work can often have me thinking I'm just a drain on them these days and that I can't rule out redundancy in 6 months due to a lack of work coming in my direction over the past year. I've been trying to get an office move for ages in order to start house buying and now I've finally got it, I'm worried about taking out a mortgage with this going on in the background.

I can often leave work in a real bad 'feeling sorry for myself' sort of mood that can easily last the rest of the day and is pretty tricky to break out even though I actively try and think about people much worse off than me and that I'm lucky to have a job, never mind a good one. However, off of that that come the thoughts of "I'm I'm one of the lucky ones, what sort of shitey evil world is this??!" which doesn't particularly help the situation. Come the next morning I'll probably be fine but it often destroys my sleep so I'll be knackered. Just the smallest of downers can kick this off again though.

Where does someone draw the line between 'just needing to snap out of feeling sorry for yourself' and 'depression'?

Ironically, I'm permanently on tablets for something else which is also used to treat bi-polar disorder. I should be permanently jumping about the place in a super-happy way.

Edited by Hedgecutter

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Where does someone draw the line between 'just needing to snap out of feeling sorry for yourself' and 'depression'?

When you, or someone close to you, thinks it has become a serious enough issue either due to change in behaviour or the effect it has on relationships/home life/work.

As I said I know what my warning signs are.......yours will be different. But as a rule of thumb, if you're beginning to try to find ways to avoid things you'd normally do, maybe there's a warning sign?

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When you, or someone close to you, thinks it has become a serious enough issue either due to change in behaviour or the effect it has on relationships/home life/work.

As I said I know what my warning signs are.......yours will be different. But as a rule of thumb, if you're beginning to try to find ways to avoid things you'd normally do, maybe there's a warning sign?

I've tried to avoid doing things all my life, work mostly. Does that count?

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I was depressed before, it took me ages to snap out of it :)

Amazing how that phrase can get peoples backs up but i believe that some people CAN just snap out of it. Its nothing they have done or changed, they just wake up one day and no longer feel depressed.

Of course there will be others who just dont see an end to it and think there is only one way out.

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If it's your normal behaviour then no, obviously!

Avoiding things, drinking heavily and being scruffy are your symptoms. That's me at my happiest.

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Never read the thread so don't know how much of a farce it has turned into.

The wife has been disagnosed Bipolar. What a freaking nightmare this is. Scared every time we go out the front door as I never know how she will react to the simplest things.If a shopping trolley bumps into her then world war three could break out or she may be embarrassingly apologetic.

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I'm not cracking wise but I want to know in the context of mental health what you think a chemical imbalance is and, conversely, what a chemical balance is. I don't think the latter actually exists, so I question the existence of the former.

This isn't to say that depression isn't something that can be treated by medication (of course it can) but the idea of restoring balance is pretty meaningless.

Well, the proposed mechanism of action of Prozac, for example, is to inhibit the re uptake of serotonin into nerve terminals following its release and action. This is thought to work in depression because there is not enough serotonin in the synaptic cleft for long enough following release. In other words, there's an imbalance between release and uptake. Blocking uptake seeks to restore the balance.

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Reading through this entire thread up to here has helped me to understand why there are so many maniacal posts on internet message boards. ph34r.gif No offence intended to any P&B members as i'm referring to the whole internet not P&B. smile.gif

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