Jump to content

Recommended Posts

1 hour ago, pandarilla said:

Hang in there mo. You're in a shite place right now but you'll come out the other end (probably a bit like hearts actually...)

 

1 hour ago, NJ2 said:


Don’t mention Hearts ffs!

This made me laugh tbf 😂

thanks for the advice folks, just a struggle right now. I’m sure I’ll get there. 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Remind me to send you the mug shots of the p&b west coast weirdos so you can stay safe!!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
This made me laugh tbf
thanks for the advice folks, just a struggle right now. I’m sure I’ll get there. 

Mo, there’s something to be said about your folks being very protective & possibly (at the moment) overpowering. They are there for you & although not always welcome, obviously really care for you.
That’s you first day in, huge step! Crying isn’t a bad thing as has been mentioned, it’s a natural release, so don’t worry about it.
Plenty of people on here (me included) will be happy to get a DM from you if you want to vent in a less public way (although we are all strangers).
Just don’t DM me about Hearts woes, not sure anyone can assist there!
Take it one day at a time & look at the below link.
Cheesy as f**k - I know, but it helped one of my friends get through a tough break up....


Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Hi, former poster from long ago here.  Sharing my story  here because I need to put a  physical "promise" of sorts out there that I'll go and get an appointment sorted out, or I'll just talk myself out of it.

Longtime silent sufferer of social anxiety(10 years or so, im mid 20s now) , and due to that silence I believe its mutated into avoidant personlity disorder.

Doing this because I was given the heave ho today by my work(administration type role in an office). Was for general poor performance, which I have zero complaints with, but it all stems from  an utter reluctance and fear of having to approach people with issues needing solved. I siimply wouldn't do it until I absolutely had to, or my line manager asked about said issue and went and solved it himself.  Created untenable issues, and they were right to bag me in all honesty. From a social context, it was a common occurence for me to spend the entire 10 hours of my shift in silence, other than saying hello and goodbye.  I'd only ever talk to my line manager, and that was when he talked to me. When he went on holiday, it was silence from me for 2 weeks. This is a busy and closeknit office of about 15ish folk, where chithchat flowed freely for everyone else, and I was the odd one out. I just have a primal fear of any social interaction with people which requires some sort of prompting on my behalf. 

I simply can't see how I can hold down a job any fulltime job if I don't take action. Hoping by writing this will give me the baws needed to do something about it.

 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Social anxiety is crippling. It impacts so many areas of your life. 

CBT has been found to be really effective for some people. It’s very much a try it and see.

In past I’ve left jobs due to my mental health and for a long time couldn’t see how I could work. I started in September after years out (other factors too) and while I can do the job, I’m now feeling the creeping doubts. But I’ll fight them! It’s onky 15 hrs a week.

Edited by RH33

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
16 minutes ago, RH33 said:

It’s onky 15 hrs a week.

More chilled when the ethnics are in for the rest of the week? :1eye

Edited by welshbairn

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
7 hours ago, Vincent Eyelash said:

Hi, former poster from long ago here.  Sharing my story  here because I need to put a  physical "promise" of sorts out there that I'll go and get an appointment sorted out, or I'll just talk myself out of it.

Longtime silent sufferer of social anxiety(10 years or so, im mid 20s now) , and due to that silence I believe its mutated into avoidant personlity disorder.

Doing this because I was given the heave ho today by my work(administration type role in an office). Was for general poor performance, which I have zero complaints with, but it all stems from  an utter reluctance and fear of having to approach people with issues needing solved. I siimply wouldn't do it until I absolutely had to, or my line manager asked about said issue and went and solved it himself.  Created untenable issues, and they were right to bag me in all honesty. From a social context, it was a common occurence for me to spend the entire 10 hours of my shift in silence, other than saying hello and goodbye.  I'd only ever talk to my line manager, and that was when he talked to me. When he went on holiday, it was silence from me for 2 weeks. This is a busy and closeknit office of about 15ish folk, where chithchat flowed freely for everyone else, and I was the odd one out. I just have a primal fear of any social interaction with people which requires some sort of prompting on my behalf. 

I simply can't see how I can hold down a job any fulltime job if I don't take action. Hoping by writing this will give me the baws needed to do something about it.

 

VE,  when you feel able to get the work thing back to the top of your agenda, check out the Fair Start website i mentioned here yesterday.  It could help you big time.  Good luck mi amigo  👍

 https://www.startscotland.scot/fair-start-scotland 

Edited by hearthammer

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
1 hour ago, NJ2 said:

Hope day two was a success@jambomo

It was, thank you. I had a better day today and have been really busy. I went to view a room in a flat after work, that was hard but I’m ok.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
28 minutes ago, Jambomo said:

It was, thank you. I had a better day today and have been really busy. I went to view a room in a flat after work, that was hard but I’m ok.

You are doing marvelously. In a few years' time you will be absolutely flying - doing even better than you were before this all happened - and you'll look back at yourself now. You will wish you could come back and talk to yourself now and tell her it will be alright. You will wish the you of now, knew how it turns out. And you will feel so proud about how you grew from all of this. 👍

Edited by Margaret Thatcher

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
On 06/01/2020 at 07:07, Dee Man said:

Reminds me of my cocky wee cousin being asked in a job interview what his weakness was and his reply was, "Kryptonite". Got the job as well. 

I've always wanted to answer that question with "redheads" but never had the courage.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
7 minutes ago, Shotgun said:

I've always wanted to answer that question with "redheads" but never had the courage.

I was in an interview once where the candidate said "Peanuts. I'm allergic to them".

I'm still not convinced he actually understood the question

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
8 minutes ago, Mark Connolly said:

I was in an interview once where the candidate said "Peanuts. I'm allergic to them".

I'm still not convinced he actually understood the question

😀  Remember when Keith from The Office answered the question on his performance review with "Eczema"?

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I had a bit of a greet at the bells last week and i’m no entirely sure why. Had no real worries or issues, its go sound strange but it was like a relief that i had made it through a year that had its ups and downs.
I had been thinking about my gran earlier in the day who i lost on hogmany four years ago. Also being on this thread has made me realise how much of a mess i made of that time. Was really close to my gran and despite trying to put a brave face on it for the boys mainly, i was stressed to the maximum with it all. Was particularly close to my gran and she passed away, i went to work between then and the funeral, then back to work the day after. I felt possibly at the time, i was trying to show the boys that you can move on from it all, but now i realise that i just made a c**t of things. Didn’t help that 3 weeks after her funeral i was involved in a bad car crash as well and that just made things worse. If i had just taken the time off and got my head around things etc i maybe would have got on better.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
I had a bit of a greet at the bells last week and i’m no entirely sure why. Had no real worries or issues, its go sound strange but it was like a relief that i had made it through a year that had its ups and downs.

 

Sounds like a lot of pent up emotion and I can totally relate to that. Whilst not having a greet at the bells (was with friends, kids all there etc), me and the wife had a wee greet in the wee hours of New Years Day once we were home.

 

2019 started with us going through a miscarriage and then my father-in-law was diagnosed with cancer in April. (Which, on a cheerier note he appears to have beaten and is in remission with positive feedback from the last few doctors appointments). Going back to New Years Day, I think the wee greet was partly due to having had a great night with good friends and a few drinks, but also a lot of emotion reflecting back on the year we’ve had, whilst also saying goodbye and f**k you to 2019 and hoping for a far better stress-free 2020.

 

So whilst the events in our lives have been different, I don’t think how we were feeling within ourselves was too dissimilar.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
 
Sounds like a lot of pent up emotion and I can totally relate to that. Whilst not having a greet at the bells (was with friends, kids all there etc), me and the wife had a wee greet in the wee hours of New Years Day once we were home.
 
2019 started with us going through a miscarriage and then my father-in-law was diagnosed with cancer in April. (Which, on a cheerier note he appears to have beaten and is in remission with positive feedback from the last few doctors appointments). Going back to New Years Day, I think the wee greet was partly due to having had a great night with good friends and a few drinks, but also a lot of emotion reflecting back on the year we’ve had, whilst also saying goodbye and f**k you to 2019 and hoping for a far better stress-free 2020.
 
So whilst the events in our lives have been different, I don’t think how we were feeling within ourselves was too dissimilar.


Good news regarding the father in law, cancers a crap disease but of it’s caught early can be beaten. Fingers crossed that things are better this year for you.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites


Good news regarding the father in law, cancers a crap disease but of it’s caught early can be beaten. Fingers crossed that things are better this year for you.


Cheers mate and you

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
15 minutes ago, 8MileBU said:

 

Sounds like a lot of pent up emotion and I can totally relate to that. Whilst not having a greet at the bells (was with friends, kids all there etc), me and the wife had a wee greet in the wee hours of New Years Day once we were home.

 

2019 started with us going through a miscarriage and then my father-in-law was diagnosed with cancer in April. (Which, on a cheerier note he appears to have beaten and is in remission with positive feedback from the last few doctors appointments). Going back to New Years Day, I think the wee greet was partly due to having had a great night with good friends and a few drinks, but also a lot of emotion reflecting back on the year we’ve had, whilst also saying goodbye and f**k you to 2019 and hoping for a far better stress-free 2020.

 

So whilst the events in our lives have been different, I don’t think how we were feeling within ourselves was too dissimilar.

Beautiful that you have someone you can greet with, and about the same shared experiences no less. Seems like a magic moment, in a weird sort of way.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
 
Sounds like a lot of pent up emotion and I can totally relate to that. Whilst not having a greet at the bells (was with friends, kids all there etc), me and the wife had a wee greet in the wee hours of New Years Day once we were home.
 
2019 started with us going through a miscarriage and then my father-in-law was diagnosed with cancer in April. (Which, on a cheerier note he appears to have beaten and is in remission with positive feedback from the last few doctors appointments). Going back to New Years Day, I think the wee greet was partly due to having had a great night with good friends and a few drinks, but also a lot of emotion reflecting back on the year we’ve had, whilst also saying goodbye and f**k you to 2019 and hoping for a far better stress-free 2020.
 
So whilst the events in our lives have been different, I don’t think how we were feeling within ourselves was too dissimilar.


It’s brilliant you have someone like that. You’re both able to share your emotions like that. I’m sorry to hear about the miscarriage, That’s a horrific thing for anyone to deal with. I’m glad your father in law is on the up and I hope 2020 is a much better year for you all mate.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

Loading...

  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    No registered users viewing this page.

×
×
  • Create New...