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You're spot ayrmad. You try and put up so many walls and have to hope that someone cares enough to try and break them down. I'm very lucky in that my family are like that and my mum can spot when my mood's low a mile off now.

When I was in action my wife could tell me I was going gambling long b4 it entered my conscious mind, some people appear better able to pick up on small changes in behaviour, as you'll probably guess, I never listened to her.

Edited by ayrmad
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Its quite scary and eye opening reading about people trying to kill themselves. I did try 3 times when i was younger but that was just a cry for help and I'm lucky my mum found me all 3 times and i got the help i needed. When i was about 18/19 i felt depressed for a while but i think i was just being a moody wee shite. Especially considering what some of you guys are going through. Massive respect for opening up about it as well.

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Its quite scary and eye opening reading about people trying to kill themselves. I did try 3 times when i was younger but that was just a cry for help and I'm lucky my mum found me all 3 times and i got the help i needed. When i was about 18/19 i felt depressed for a while but i think i was just being a moody wee shite. Especially considering what some of you guys are going through. Massive respect for opening up about it as well.

I know what you mean but people shouldn't think like this. Saying you're not allowed to feel bad because people have it worse than you is like saying you're not allowed to be happy because people have it better than you. The only experiences you can have are your own.

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I know what you mean but people shouldn't think like this. Saying you're not allowed to feel bad because people have it worse than you is like saying you're not allowed to be happy because people have it better than you. The only experiences you can have are your own.

Nah man i was never depressed i was just down! I know this now but obviously not at the time.

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A night out with Matty at the Rooms and a bag full of drugs and you'll wake up in the Hilltoon 3 days later dazed and confused.

Seriously though, all the best, mate. Just split up with my girlfriend as well. It's always tough regardless of how much you wanted it but in a few days, weeks or months you'll be laughing at how bad you feel right now.

Hive looks really good in photos as well. They both have really good photographers. The good thing about Fat Sams is it's like our Union except the clientele are better looking and there's a strong possibility of getting glassed. Two plus points IMO.

Hive >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> Fat Sams ;)

It's hard mate, it does and will get easier. I'd like to echo the plan of Rooms & Swedgers. You'll not wake up in the hilltoon, you'll wake up in a beautiful waterfront pad in the quay. Trust me. Every fucking time. :lol:

:lol:. f**k it i'm heading up to Dundee for my next night out

How long were you going out with her?

I wouldn't think about leaving training because of her getting it on with some other guy, that's not your fault!

About 2months mate. If it does happen i don't know if i could be on the same pitch as him. Just seeing him there would make me angry :(

If she does just make sure he is always on the opposition team for training...

:lol:.

I'm not that type of guy that's starts fights etc but i would just get my head down, ignore them and get on with it ;)

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Hive >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> Fat Sams ;)

:lol:. f**k it i'm heading up to Dundee for my next night out

About 2months mate. If it does happen i don't know if i could be on the same pitch as him. Just seeing him there would make me angry :(

:lol:.

I'm not that type of guy that's starts fights etc but i would just get my head down, ignore them and get on with it ;)

f**k that, I'm moving up there!

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We should have a night out in Dundee.

:)

I'm not actually moving up there sadly, although I wouldn't rule it in the future. I'm looking to move to Aberdeen early next year, but after that who knows.

I genuinely would be up for a night out in Dundee mind!

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I'm not actually moving up there sadly, although I wouldn't rule it in the future. I'm looking to move to Aberdeen early next year, but after that who knows.

I genuinely would be up for a night out in Dundee mind!

As Matty said you're guaranteed some fun :ph34r:

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2 things from previous posts (still can't quote or copy.....does someone not loke me?)

Only medication I ever had was low dose sertraline, even taking that before bedtime I'd sleep 12 hours at least, so we stopped that.

Re suicide: never been to that dark place myself, but having seen wife no 2 try 3 times (all overdoses), twice ended up in hospital, last time.........

It must be a really awful place to be, I can only say tell someone.

If someone does tell you they're thinking about it take it seriously. I still blame myself, but as she told the psych at the hospital after attempt no2 "If I'm going to do it I'll find a way even if you take all my meds away..."

Anyway, I'm doing better after last weeks collapse, and have made better plans for Christmas so I don't end up back alone in a big empty house with too many thoughts and any booze!

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Apologies for messed up posts above. My wife has had problems with depression for years which stems from childhood abuse. I have been with her 16 years and in that time it has got worse and worse.

She can be the most amazing person in the world most of the time, but when she is bad it's hellish to live with.

Shortly after our first was born (late 1999), she had been off the meds for a while, but was getting stressed a lot. I came home from work one day and she hadn't got out of bed and the baby was screaming in her cot, hadn't been fed or changed all day. I gave up work and we lost everything, but it was worth it as she got better and the baby got looked after. After our second it was a lot better for a few years, but she got very self consious and sex was non exsistant for years. No big deal really; she was fine apart from that, but she started accusing me of sleeping with her friends because I wasn't getting any at home, which was totally untrue and extremely hurtful, but we got through it.

We had bouts of it again off and on for years and it was getting harder to live with the constant accusations of cheating and always arguing, but I wasn't going to leave the kids again so I stuck it out.

It's been a long road, and she seems to have been better recently, but this Christmas is going to be hard. We are really toiling for money this year and the kids deserve a good Christmas. I'm getting really close to the limit financially and the strain of trying to keep things ticking as well as having to do things like tidying the house and cooking the kids tea after a long day at work are having a big effect on me now. There are days I have to park the car up and just have a half an hour to chill out and get ready for the stress of going home. I don't know how much longer I can keep doing it like this, but my main concern is the kids. If I don't act normally around them it will spoil their Xmas and I can't find any enthusiasm in myself about it. If I say anything to her about it she will go away into herself again and it will spoil Xmas. I feel like I'm going to explode most of the time and now I can barely hold it in, and that makes me even worse. All my mates are noticing my moods now too and I am a mess at work, making stupid mistakes and not concentrating. I can see all the signs of depression developing in myself but I can't let it. If I get through the month then it will get easier, but I've not been able to talk to anyone about it until I found this thread. Sorry for the rant

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Guest The Phoenix

So poignant and inspiring to read through this thread.

Respect to each and every one of you. Best wishes.

Weird, I was just thinking that as I read the last few pages and then I scrolled down to yours.

I've never been depressed but close family members have (being related to me might be a factor) and the overwhelming feeling I can recall is of being helpless to help.

As Davis says, best wishes to everyone.

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Apologies for messed up posts above. My wife has had problems with depression for years which stems from childhood abuse. I have been with her 16 years and in that time it has got worse and worse.

She can be the most amazing person in the world most of the time, but when she is bad it's hellish to live with.

Shortly after our first was born (late 1999), she had been off the meds for a while, but was getting stressed a lot. I came home from work one day and she hadn't got out of bed and the baby was screaming in her cot, hadn't been fed or changed all day. I gave up work and we lost everything, but it was worth it as she got better and the baby got looked after. After our second it was a lot better for a few years, but she got very self consious and sex was non exsistant for years. No big deal really; she was fine apart from that, but she started accusing me of sleeping with her friends because I wasn't getting any at home, which was totally untrue and extremely hurtful, but we got through it.

We had bouts of it again off and on for years and it was getting harder to live with the constant accusations of cheating and always arguing, but I wasn't going to leave the kids again so I stuck it out.

It's been a long road, and she seems to have been better recently, but this Christmas is going to be hard. We are really toiling for money this year and the kids deserve a good Christmas. I'm getting really close to the limit financially and the strain of trying to keep things ticking as well as having to do things like tidying the house and cooking the kids tea after a long day at work are having a big effect on me now. There are days I have to park the car up and just have a half an hour to chill out and get ready for the stress of going home. I don't know how much longer I can keep doing it like this, but my main concern is the kids. If I don't act normally around them it will spoil their Xmas and I can't find any enthusiasm in myself about it. If I say anything to her about it she will go away into herself again and it will spoil Xmas. I feel like I'm going to explode most of the time and now I can barely hold it in, and that makes me even worse. All my mates are noticing my moods now too and I am a mess at work, making stupid mistakes and not concentrating. I can see all the signs of depression developing in myself but I can't let it. If I get through the month then it will get easier, but I've not been able to talk to anyone about it until I found this thread. Sorry for the rant

It's not a rant, it's catharsis. It won't help you to keep these things bottled up.

When you talk to your wife, do you tell her what you want from/for her or do you ask her if there's anything you could do to help her? Sorry if that sounds like a patronising question but the difference between the two things is massive and the way you've said "if I say anything to her" makes me wonder if there's another way you could talk to her that could be more beneficial. Your wife's situation sounds very similar to mine so if there's anything you'd like to ask me or talk about, feel free.

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