Depression

[Dons_1988]

2 hours ago, tirso said:

I'm touched by a lot of these issues as well and i think its amazing p&b has this thread.  

i'm  anxious about even discussing this with a doctor.  not even sure what you say to them.  seems hard to me to open up like that.  it's a Scottish man's thing i think.

seems to me keeping yourself busy and having a routine that gets me out the house is the best way to keep it at bay.   when it comes it comes hard though and there's just no way of getting out of it til its passed.  i say passed but it never goes away; just tempered.  

recently ive found a bit of white noise and reading now when i feel it coming on bad.  youtube is good for that kind of thing.  feel for the folk with kids, one thing that i worry about is im sure i will freak out at some point and wouldn't be good at all when kids are there.  its an illness though and i think society is getting better at it.  still a long way to go though.

Glad you found this thread, a lot of good people on here to bounce things off.

I'd get to the doctor though, it's not as bad as you think.  Just don't expect them to have an instant solution straight away.  Everyone's experience of mental health issues is different so it's not as easy as just getting the right pill (in my opinion).

Keep talking and read through this thread, lots of different experiences and ways of dealing with things which hopefully helps you find the right thing for you.

[Raidernation]

Guess what?
Last weekend I relapsed big time.
I have spend a few days in hospital, a lot of times feeling worthless but I am making positive moves.
Spoke to my therapist and was honest. On release from hospital (aye that severe)!was given a list of IOP, PHP, or inpatient options.
Today I stared PHP(partial hospitalization plan) which basically means I attend groups all day but get to home at night.
So far(day one) but so good. I like the facility, I like the people, my daughters support me doing this, work is trying to find a way to push me out on non-medical issues but they are fishing.
I am hopeful this will work

[tirso]

On 2/18/2019 at 14:29, Dons_1988 said:

Glad you found this thread, a lot of good people on here to bounce things off.

I'd get to the doctor though, it's not as bad as you think.  Just don't expect them to have an instant solution straight away.  Everyone's experience of mental health issues is different so it's not as easy as just getting the right pill (in my opinion).

Keep talking and read through this thread, lots of different experiences and ways of dealing with things which hopefully helps you find the right thing for you.

thanks for the reply.  yeah i should; but i'm also worried about getting hooked on these tablets as well and if it will change me in other ways.  on balance its probably worth it.  i agree doesnt' seem to be any easy answers.  

[mizfit]

Not really wrote on this for a while, but I think I need to vent.

 

Last year I moved in with my girlfriend. It was good, I had a good job and I was genuinely happy.

 

This year though seems to have smacked me in the face.

 

My job was punted and I was slapped back into a dead end job.

 

 

My girlfriend also seems to have developed this habit of not tidying up, and leaving everything lying at her arse. This has tonight resulted in me having a breakdown and screaming at her over not doing dishes.

 

I genuinely feel at my lowest ebb in a while.

 

[Bairnardo]

Not really wrote on this for a while, but I think I need to vent.
 
Last year I moved in with my girlfriend. It was good, I had a good job and I was genuinely happy.
 
This year though seems to have smacked me in the face.
 
My job was punted and I was slapped back into a dead end job.
 
 
My girlfriend also seems to have developed this habit of not tidying up, and leaving everything lying at her arse. This has tonight resulted in me having a breakdown and screaming at her over not doing dishes.
 
I genuinely feel at my lowest ebb in a while.
 

Dont be too hard on yourself for losing the rag over something that may seem trivial in hindsight. This is a tad simplistic for this thread maybe, but I am a big believer in the occasional need to vent, and it happens over the silliest things sometimes. Aye it feels horrible at the time. I can mind my wife coming in the kitchen to catch me crying my eyes out because I had previously went ballistic my daughter over something but ultimately it helped I think.

[Pride of Lanarkshire]

Honest question here. Not read much of this thread so it might have been covered. Has anyone who have came out of depression . missed the depressed state they were in

[Pride of Lanarkshire]

i know that sounds strange

[paranoid android]

14 minutes ago, Pride of Lanarkshire said:

i know that sounds strange

I've heard about people becoming almost 'addicted' to lows in the way that some folk get addicted to highs.

[Pride of Lanarkshire]

10 minutes ago, paranoid android said:

I've heard about people becoming almost 'addicted' to lows in the way that some folk get addicted to highs.

i think its more that you think about others more, and other peoples feelings but in your depressed state its only about you.  cheers for pointing out am not crazy saying that

[RH33]

1 hour ago, Pride of Lanarkshire said:

Honest question here. Not read much of this thread so it might have been covered. Has anyone who have came out of depression . missed the depressed state they were in

I used to go to a support group for people but I stopped going as their were people there who had no interest in getting better. 

[Pride of Lanarkshire]

1 minute ago, Rowan said:

I used to go to a support group for people but I stopped going as their were people there who had no interest in getting better. 

sorry man .i think i never worded my post better. i was meaning people who got out of depression. but liked the the feeling. not never getting better

 

 

[RH33]

5 minutes ago, Pride of Lanarkshire said:

sorry man .i think i never worded my post better. i was meaning people who got out of depression. but liked the the feeling. not never getting better

 

 

Ah right, I would think there probably is. 

[Pride of Lanarkshire]

yeah i was one. just asking if it happened with anyone else

[Dons_1988]

11 hours ago, Pride of Lanarkshire said:

yeah i was one. just asking if it happened with anyone else

Do you mind if I ask what you mean by liked the feeling?

[Raidernation]

An update quines and loons;
I’m doing well, I did not drink today, I will not drink tomorrow.
I am very appreciative that I have this chance and the opportunity, hopefully, to have the time to properly sort out my dual diagnosis issues.
I’m not looking to stay in treatment forever but I finally begin to realise that until I am stronger and more stable and believe in my sobriety there’s little point going back to what has put me in this position.
Thanks for all the support

[Stellaboz]

Honest question here. Not read much of this thread so it might have been covered. Has anyone who have came out of depression . missed the depressed state they were in

I know what you mean. I don't know if I enjoy it but sometimes I get into unconscious habits that push me back that way, so that my mental state can be passive and I don't have to think so hard.

It's good to acknowledge what you said though, I don't think enough people really study hard how they feel, which is why they find it hard to get better. It's almost a mental addiction and it's a c**t to beat.

[Dons_1988]

An update quines and loons;
I’m doing well, I did not drink today, I will not drink tomorrow.
I am very appreciative that I have this chance and the opportunity, hopefully, to have the time to properly sort out my dual diagnosis issues.
I’m not looking to stay in treatment forever but I finally begin to realise that until I am stronger and more stable and believe in my sobriety there’s little point going back to what has put me in this position.
Thanks for all the support

Fantastic to hear.

I always get slightly concerned when you post in this thread but delighted to hear all is going well.

[Jambomo]

I don’t know if this is the right place to post, as it’s not depression as such but I am struggling so much at the moment because I feel lonely. Is that stupid? It’s not that I don’t have family who care and my (now ex) partner is great in that we still have a solid friendship and I can talk to him about anything.

The problem is that I find making real friends hard. I know a lot of people but I don’t feel I have anyone that I can message and meet for a coffee or things like that. I have a couple of good friends but they live abroad.

It makes me feel a bit pathetic tbh, even writing this does. I have recently had pretty dark thoughts though, so I think I need to work out something to do.

[DA Baracus]

57 minutes ago, Jambomo said:

I don’t know if this is the right place to post, as it’s not depression as such but I am struggling so much at the moment because I feel lonely. Is that stupid? It’s not that I don’t have family who care and my (now ex) partner is great in that we still have a solid friendship and I can talk to him about anything.

The problem is that I find making real friends hard. I know a lot of people but I don’t feel I have anyone that I can message and meet for a coffee or things like that. I have a couple of good friends but they live abroad.

It makes me feel a bit pathetic tbh, even writing this does. I have recently had pretty dark thoughts though, so I think I need to work out something to do.

That's not pathetic or stupid or even uncommon. Life unfortunately can throw this scenario up all top often. 

Lonliness is an absolute killer and as you've stated yourself can lead to dark thoughts.

It can be hard to sort. I'm in a similar position in that I live alone and don't really have any friends here, so can't just text a pal asking if they want to have a beer or just hang out or whatever. 

I think it's important what not to do. Definitely don't make a habit of drinking alone in your house. Try to remember that social media is a snapshot where everyone is trying to make out what a good time they're having and often isn't reality. I sometimes see things and wonder why I can't be out with friends having a laugh and feel awful for it. Just remember that a lot of the time it's folk sitting in a pub on their phone all night only to take a quick photo and remark that it's the best night ever.

Unfortunately the issue very rarely sorts itself. I know from bitter experience that passivity solves nothing. You will need to do things to try and make new friends. The usual things like clubs and societies are a good start, with the internet being your friend there. Things like pub quizzes can help. Just look out for opportunities and try to take them, and don't give up.

As you can see from this thread you can always speak to folk on here to vent and express your thoughts, and I'm always open to a PM.

 

[Dons_1988]

I don’t know if this is the right place to post, as it’s not depression as such but I am struggling so much at the moment because I feel lonely. Is that stupid? It’s not that I don’t have family who care and my (now ex) partner is great in that we still have a solid friendship and I can talk to him about anything.

 

The problem is that I find making real friends hard. I know a lot of people but I don’t feel I have anyone that I can message and meet for a coffee or things like that. I have a couple of good friends but they live abroad.

 

It makes me feel a bit pathetic tbh, even writing this does. I have recently had pretty dark thoughts though, so I think I need to work out something to do.

 

DA baracus has put it better than I ever can but nothing to be embarrassed about at all.

 

I’m a bit of a loner/selective with friends but when I’ve been at my lowest I’ve regretted not having enough people around me to share with.

 

Again, DA has nailed it. You know yourself you may not be depressed but don’t regress into a shell like I’ve done in the past. Get out and socialise, outside your comfort zone. I’ve found myself hiding at home drinking because I thought socialising was the worst thing for me. I was very wrong. People can surprise you if you just get out and socialise.