Strange dreams

[YassinMoutaouakil]

I dreamt that I went Highland dancing with a goth girl I vaguely know and ended up sprinting from Fortrose to Inverness because I forgot my phone. Was quite a good dream in all honesty.

[banana]

Had a couple of really bizarre ones last night. First was me trying to go down some stairs but the structure was incredibly weak and, despite the two people I was with having no problems descending the stairs, I started having a panic attack and refused to move. The dream then cuts to me at the other side of the floor being calmed down with pieces of haribo. I'm then put onto a bus being driven by raving BritNat Alan Cochrane and, on trying to escape the bus, change my mind just as the door is closing and get stuck.

Second was the results of the General Election coming in. The SNP do brilliantly, but in completely made-up seats. The ticker at the bottom has some incredible results, such as "SNP GAIN BART", and "SNP GAIN INVINTATION IN GYMNASIUM". I'm delighted even though I don't know what the f**k is going on with the constituency names.

Pissing myself at these

[BFTD]

Been ages since I've had a dream I remember, but the last one I do remember had Mrs Mile shaking my shoulder frantically to wake me up cos of the racket I was making. I remember getting a fright too when I woke and heard myself. Then I lay puzzled for a while thinking 'WTF?!'

Basically, I was in a big hall somewhere, like you might find in a sports or community centre, but there were a bunch of young rascals had climbed up on and were messing about on the roof, so I started to shout at them.

Mrs Mile got a fright woke up and spent a minute shaking me by the shoulder and slapping my jaw to wake me and stop me roaring "Haaaaaayyyy!!!! Haaaaaayyyy!!!! Haaaaaayyy!!!!"

Sounds like you're intercepting my real life memories from about seven or eight year ago.

Slightly concerned by this, but thankfully nothing you dream can be used in court

[tongue_tied_danny]

My dreams often have a recurring theme. At least twice a week in my dream I'll have some kind of important appointment, like an exam or a job interview, but no matter how hard I try I just can't get my shit together to get there. I'll be getting dressed or packing my bags or whatever but it just isn't happening and I don't make it on time.

Last night was a slight variation to this theme. In my dream I'd been sucked into the world of Command & Conquer and was hastily trying to arrange my defenses in the face of an imminent attack by the enemy. However I was unable to build any kind of fortifications and could only watch helplessly as the Brotherhood Of Nod easily kicked f**k out of my puny garrison.

Edited April 23, 2015 by tongue_tied_danny

[Hedgecutter]

Last night I discovered a whole new series of passages in a cave system up north and was getting seriously pissed off with the public invading my dig and asking what I was doing. I was also annoyed that they set up a TripAdvisor page for the extra section when it was clearly part of the same cave which already had a page covering it. F***ing tourists.

[Miguel Sanchez]

I have this dream regularly as well except it goes over my house and crashes in the empty land beside it. I then go out with my brother and have a wee poke about the wreckage, luckily there's never any passengers or pilots.

Probably why it keeps crashing.

[Sweaty Morph]

I dreamt the other night that I was playing fives with folk from Pie and Bovril. I only know this because everyone had their username on the back of their shirt. My outstanding memories of the dream are that Throbber wasn't wearing any socks and Binos123sam was a wee fat Chinese guy wearing a Clyde top.

[Derek Patterson]

Just recalled a dream from the other week where I was at a car boot sale on some sort of airfield (Errol maybe?) where the Undertaker had a stall selling 2nd hand motorbike clothing.

Despite being from Texas he had old British police bike jackets and helmets for some reason aswell as related auto jumble. Odd.

Edited April 23, 2015 by Derek Patterson

[Estragon]

Just recalled a dream from the other week where I was at a car boot sale on some sort of airfield (Errol maybe?) where the Undertaker had a stall selling 2nd hand motorbike clothing.

Despite being from Texas he had old British police bike jackets and helmets for some reason aswell as related auto jumble. Odd.

[banana]

Last night, dreamt I went back to uni as a mature student, at Yale of all places. Couldn't figure out when my classes were, nor where anything was despite having a video-game-like mini-map in my view. Two lovely, hottie students were into me. I later figured out there were no classes because it was still fresher's week. I woke up gutted I'd never meet the hotties again.

[Dee Man]

Last night, dreamt I went back to uni as a mature student, at Yale of all places. Couldn't figure out when my classes were, nor where anything was despite having a video-game-like mini-map in my view. Two lovely, hottie students were into me. I later figured out there were no classes because it was still fresher's week. I woke up gutted I'd never meet the hotties again.

[Wardy]

Dreamt the other night, that Rick Grimes from the walking dead had made it to Scotland, where we were still a functioning country. He was beside himself and didn't know what to do.

[Blootoon87]

I dreamt that I woke and had shat the bed during the night. For some reason Katy Perry was in bed with me and was quite rightly disgusted with me, then she threw the shitey bedsheets out the window and stormed out.

[BFTD]

Last night, dreamt I went back to uni as a mature student, at Yale of all places. Couldn't figure out when my classes were, nor where anything was despite having a video-game-like mini-map in my view. Two lovely, hottie students were into me. I later figured out there were no classes because it was still fresher's week. I woke up gutted I'd never meet the hotties again.

I regularly dream that I'm back at school and have no idea where my classes are. I also don't have a clue what I'm doing in the class when I finally get there. WHAT DOES IT ALL MEAN?!

Sadly, it never turns into a Columbine-style situation, so it's quite depressing.

[banana]

I regularly dream that I'm back at school and have no idea where my classes are. I also don't have a clue what I'm doing in the class when I finally get there. WHAT DOES IT ALL MEAN?!

Sadly, it never turns into a Columbine-style situation, so it's quite depressing.

I get them once a year or so where it's exam time in my final year, and I've not been to any classes and have no idea what I'm studying. Really gutting, actually.

No idea what it all means, just glad it's not real

OR IS IT?

[Waspy]

I had a dream about the play off score on Sunday. I missed the game and got home to check the scores on the red button. Alloa win 5-2 with Forfar scoring first.

Might pop down the bookies and get a price for that.

[BFTD]

Last night's dream: I was in an old mansion down in England in the Seventies, and Jimmy Savile was lurking around like the creepy weirdo he was. I kept trying to tell people what kind of person he was, but they'd have none of it. He kept appearing in the background, cackling at my impotence like a silent movie villain. Eventually he crept out of the place, presumably to go and abuse some children, and I couldn't find a way out of the building to go and follow him.

Not the best dream I've had TBH.

[BFTD]

I had a dream about the play off score on Sunday. I missed the game and got home to check the scores on the red button. Alloa win 5-2 with Forfar scoring first.

Might pop down the bookies and get a price for that.

You can buy scores at your bookies?

Count me in - surely we can save up enough for that scoreline between us all.

[DA Baracus]

Had a fucking weird dream last night/early this morning. I had been having a fairly peaceful doze but woke up at what I estimate must have been around 4-5am. I then drifted back to sleep and this is where my dream began. It started off like I was watching a TV show, although the only credits were ‘Guest Starring’ then underneath that ‘Sylvester Stallone’. Both were in blood red. Stallone (dressed like he does in the Expendables) is then seen driving a Mustang but crashes in to another car. To his horror, the driver of the other car is Jason Voorhees. Jason is slumped over the steering wheel. Seeing he is down, Stallone drives away in a massive panic, fearing for his life. Voorhees comes around and then starts to melt through a hole in the smashed windscreen, like the T1000 does in Terminator 2.

Jason then transforms in to a huge bird. I didn’t see this, but the dream cut to a huge shadow of a phoenix on the side of a building. The bird revealed itself, and was called Mr Macaw. It looked like a cross between a parrot and a phoenix though, not a macaw. No idea how I knew it’s name was Mr Macaw, but I just knew. Mr Macaw soon revealed himself to be a fucking psycho. He killed two children, one of which he rolled up in a carpet with his beak and the other he pecked to death against a fence. He started to prowl the streets, and stopped outside two doors that were on the end of a block. He started furiously pounding on the doors with his beak, 3 knocks at a time per door before switching to the other, shouting horrible abuse whilst he was doing it. When the doors were answered (both by guys in their 40s wearing pyjamas, with one of the wearing one of those stupid pyjama hats), Mr Macaw killed the guys with a single peck of his beak, which smashed opened the guys’ heads much like a huge bullet would.

For some reason I was then actually in the dream, instead of watching it like a TV show, although I wasn’t actually me, if that makes sense. It was like I was controlling another person. I had a friend in this dream called Pipe (someone I’ve never seen, and I’ve never heard of anyone called ‘Pipe’). We were close friends, and lived in a wee strange house. Our parents had come over to visit (although my parents were two folk I’ve never seen before), but Pipe was terrified, saying that Mr Macaw was on a rampage and would soon be coming for us. Pipe’s parents thought he was mental and talking shit, and Pipe’s dad started to mock him, shouting for Mr Macaw to come and prove he was real. At this point the house suddenly and for no reason only had walls and a roof over half of it, meaning half of it was uncovered. Mr Macaw appeared and everyone was shocked.

The dream then cut to Mr Macaw walking a dog along the street, as if it was normal. He bumped in to Pipe and Pipe said “Hello Mr Macaw” as if they were friends, and Mr Macaw replied “Alright Pipe!”. The dream suddenly cut again, and me, Pipe and Pipe’s parents were on the uncovered top deck of a double decker bus that belonged to us. Pipe’s dad was being a knob again (it was implied in the dream that he was always a tosser and that Pipe didn’t really like and didn’t get along with him) and doubting Mr Macaw’s existence. Suddenly Mr Macaw was alongside the bus, and had developed telekinetic powers, as he was making the bus go faster. He then focused on Pipe’s dad, and shouted “Out you come!”, and the seat Pipe’s dad was on shot up in to the sky and it was assumed that Pipe’s dad was dead. Everyone seemed pretty pleased by this, and for some reason it seemed that Mr Macaw was now a bit of a good guy, despite having just terrified the city and murdered a load of folk the night before.

Then I woke up and wondered what the f**k I had just dreamed, and for at least 10 minutes genuinely was a bit worried that I was having some sort of mental breakdown. It’s still quite troubling to think of.

[DA Baracus]

No mental dreams last night thankfully