Strange dreams

[D.A.F.C]

I was a boxer and the guy I was fighting was flat sharing but kept pranking me before the press conferences. Replaced razor blades with blunt ones so I turned up covered in wee cuts.

[Hedgecutter]

Last night:  Supposedly killed a guy in my sleep and was sentenced to 12 years in jail.  Dreamt the entire process out from the court appearance through to the prison induction process.  Arrived and was sent outside to play rounders with the other inmates.   Had to say goodbye to my other half, knowing I wouldn't see her for any of that time.  Not a particularly nice dream.  

[Stellaboz]

Had a dream about the Trivago woman last night, we were banging in an infinity pool at the top of the Marina Bay Sands hotel as the sun was setting. Vogue magazine were doing a photo shoot of us from helicopters and I was swigging from a bottle of champagne, what does it mean? 

We've all had a go, kind of walks with a limp now.

[pittsburgh phil]

As good as a really bizarre vivid dream can be, I often have the most mundane dreams which ironically make me chuckle at the sheer shitness of them. A particular highlight was one where I was discussing the prospect of St Johnstone signing Ian Vigurs with my dad. We both agreed it was a poor idea.

[Shandon Par]

Not sure if it was seeing police taping up a murder scene the other day or if it's just having to deal with a couple of really awkward people right now but I've become a terrible murderer in my dreams. The other night I'd hung a couple of folk up inside sleeping bags and set fire to them and last night I chucked someone into a pit of constrictor snakes. Once they'd crushed him a bit the snakes chucked him out and we then deep fried him in a huge vat as they liked their food fried then chucked him back in. Sorry about that. 

[JakeSAFC]

Had a dream the other night I was on a packed Scotrail train and that Ninja guy who plays fortnite was on it making cat noises. Everyone was getting pissed off, so I took it upon myself to start ripping into him. He didn't take it well and started going mental, the whole carriage was laughing at me ripping him. He then took his wig off, unsure if he wears a wig in all honesty, and started waving it about. I then grabbed the wig and threw it off the train.

Woke up pishing myself laughing.

[++Ammo - Airdrie++]

Dreamt last night that me and a guy I used to be mates with about 15 years ago were in Airdrie town centre, just outside Burton's. The streets were rammed, like some sort of fair day. My mate made a throwaway comment to some lassie, quite pretty and her boyfriend appeared with about 4 other guys and proceeded to stamp all over my big mates head while the police watched.
Bizarre.

[nsr]

I dreamed that a massive fireworks display, on the scale of New Year in London, was taking place in the park at the unimpressive wee town in Lanarkshire where I grew up. My wife and I went up in a helicopter to get a good view.

[BFTD]

I was working on building a Fallout-style vault for rich folk when apocalyptic nuclear war broke out on the surface, so I ended up trapped down there with the other folk who'd been working on it. One of them was a young lady that I used to work with IRL (lovely girl, but wid not), who sneaked into my room and did absolutely filthy things. Then I got a phone call that my father had died, and all I could feel was relief that I had the excuse of being trapped in a nuclear bunker for not going to the funeral. Not sure why I was being contacted about his death in particular, or who by, considering everybody on the surface was dead, but you don't tend to think of these questions during coitus.

[welshbairn]

9 minutes ago, BigFatTabbyDave said:

Then I got a phone call that my father had died, and all I could feel was relief that I had the excuse of being trapped in a nuclear bunker for not going to the funeral.

My main concern about relatives getting ill or frail is having to go to their funerals. Think I might be on the spectrum.

[Silverton End]

Not entirely sure if there's a time cycle to dreams. I seem to average one a month, or one that I'm able to remember at any rate.

Latest was in a Veterinary Surgery, & everyone that was coming and going were bringing in stuffed animals for the Vet to see.

 

[nsr]

13 hours ago, welshbairn said:

My main concern about relatives getting ill or frail is having to go to their funerals. Think I might be on the spectrum.

People I know always seem to have their funerals on weekdays. I'd have to really like someone (or really want to make sure they were dead) to take a day off work to attend.

[ICTChris]

My wife had a dream last night that we were on holiday and Pamela Anderson was in the hotel, together with her pet polar bear. She went swimming with it and my wife said to me “that’s an accident waiting to happen” but I said she was being clever and tiring the polar bear out by swimming so it would be too tired to eat her,

[HenryHill]

On 15/03/2019 at 00:43, welshbairn said:

My main concern about relatives getting ill or frail is having to go to their funerals. Think I might be on the spectrum.

Going to the funeral is fine. Its organising one I am dreading.

[Miguel Sanchez]

Had a dream last night Celtic got beat in the UEFA Cup final. They were playing some Lithuanian mob in orange tops, who were winning 3-1 in extra time. One of their players handled a ball into their box, James Forrest's subsequent penalty was saved. He put the rebound into the net, but because the net was so shallow (think about half the depth of the one to the right at Stamford Bridge) the referee didn't notice and never gave it. Liam McLeod went mental at this point. The wheels came off at that point, think it was 6-2 to finish. 

The only reason I joined the match so late is because I was watching highlights of Brian Wilson at TRNSMT on the other channel. 

[Melanius Mullarkey]

Last night I was in the kitchen stirring up a pot of beans which rapidly turned into ceramic baking beads.

A lesson for us all there. 

[Stellaboz]

I shot a bunch of teenagers last night for trying to sleep in our home. This after they partied on the street outside and set an ice cream van on fire.

Not sure what triggered the rage more. Told the missus this morning about it and she started avoiding me.

[Dee Man]

32 minutes ago, Stellaboz said:

I shot a bunch of teenagers last night for trying to sleep in our home. This after they partied on the street outside and set an ice cream van on fire.

Not sure what triggered the rage more. Told the missus this morning about it and she started avoiding me.

You were reading about the ice cream van incidents in the Best School Fight thread yesterday, weren't you?

[HenryHill]

9 hours ago, Stellaboz said:

I shot a bunch of teenagers last night for trying to sleep in our home. This after they partied on the street outside and set an ice cream van on fire.

Not sure what triggered the rage more. Told the missus this morning about it and she started avoiding me.

So you have 99 problems.. 

[Shandon Par]

Had a dream that missus was "looking for a new dance partner". I was a bit taken aback and said I'd take her dancing but as she has a broken leg just now it's not something she can do right now. Then I saw the icon on her phone for this new "dance partner app" on her phone was a big ejaculating cock and I was a bit annoyed. Then the door opened and her new "dance partner" walked in. He was a decent looking youngish lad, black but with quite light skin (a bit like Eazy E in my avatar). She introduced him as virginton from Pie and Bovril. FFS.