Annoying things people write on Facebook

[Shotgun]

Hi [emoji848]Thanks for the tips to bypass FB...it WORKS!! I have a whole new news feed. I’m seeing posts from people I haven’t seen in years. Here’s how to bypass the system FB now has in place that limits posts on your news feed. Their new algorithm chooses the same few people - about 25 - who will read your posts. Therefore, Hold your finger down anywhere in this post and "copy" will pop up. Click "copy". Then go your page, start a new post and put your finger anywhere in the blank field. "Paste" will pop up and click paste. This will bypass the system. Hi new and old friends! Missed you!

[ajwffc]

Wut

It is the latest chain letter style pish. Replacing the post a specific message and you won't be charged to continue to use Facebook

[Gaz]

Yon Lorna is on a roll today:

Aye Andy Stewart you were magical.

You made sweet memories 
Through the years
But now we’re old
There’s many tears.
When thinking back
To those great days 
When clock chimed 12
It was the way.
You’d wish us all
A guid new year
This Hogmanay 
You’d sing, we’d hear.
Your lilting voice
Rise up and sing
A Scottish song
Great memories, bring
A tug of heartstrings 
Lump in throat
Aye many’s the time
You’d hit right note.
The tears 
They would come tumbling out
Inclined to think 
What’s that about.
But Hogmanay 
Brings memories back
We thought were lost
In some big sack.
Just circling round 
The universe
To reappear
Chapter and verse.
Within our minds
Till each year brings
Reminders, just before the bells
Of tunes you used to sing.
‘Come in come in’
‘Scotland the brave’
The dancers twirled
Lots more we’d crave.
We’ll not forget 
The atmosphere 
That stays within
Our hearts so dear.
And come the bells
We all will gather
Enjoy ourselves 
Nothing else will matter.
A new year, Hogmanay 
New beginnings 
Strike up the band
And let’s get singing.
‘Come in’ ‘Come in’
It’s still the one
To just remind us
Another year done.

[ajwffc]

Taken from an old friend:

"It's almost 2019, I'm almost 65 years old and almost worn out and I still have so many unanswered questions!!!! I haven’t found out who let the dogs out...where’s the beef...how to get to Sesame Street... why Dora doesn’t just use Google Maps...Why do all flavors of fruit loops taste exactly the same, or how many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop......why eggs are packaged in a flimsy carton, but batteries are secured in plastic that’s tough as nails...what does the fox say... why “abbreviated” is such a long word; or why is there a D in ‘fridge’ but not in refrigerator... why lemon juice is made with artificial flavor yet dish-washing liquid is made with real lemons and, why do you have to “put your two cents in” but it’s only a “penny for your thoughts” where’s that extra penny going to... why does The Alphabet Song and Twinkle Twinkle Little Star have the same tune... why did you just try to sing those two previous songs... and just what exactly is Victoria’s secret? and where is Waldo?... Can you hear me now?...and do you really think I am this witty?? ... I actually got this from a friend, who stole it from her brother’s girlfriend’s, uncle’s cousin’s who lived next door to an old class mate’s mailman...Now it is your turn to take it from me... Copy and Paste, change the age, and enjoy your day. I needed the laugh. Have an awesome 2019!"
The above from Lorna has the following reply from I assume is a member of P&B

[madwullie]

 

Not Hugh Hainey's best work but an insight into his style. Written for historic Hamilton. 

Edited December 31, 2018 by madwullie

[19QOS19]

I was transferred across 
To the big shop to work
Down under the stairs

I bet the guy who made that decision was forever loved by the other employees.

[DA Baracus]

11 hours ago, ajwffc said:

Taken from an old friend:

"It's almost 2019, I'm almost 65 years old and almost worn out and I still have so many unanswered questions!!!! I haven’t found out who let the dogs out...where’s the beef...how to get to Sesame Street... why Dora doesn’t just use Google Maps...Why do all flavors of fruit loops taste exactly the same, or how many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop......why eggs are packaged in a flimsy carton, but batteries are secured in plastic that’s tough as nails...what does the fox say... why “abbreviated” is such a long word; or why is there a D in ‘fridge’ but not in refrigerator... why lemon juice is made with artificial flavor yet dish-washing liquid is made with real lemons and, why do you have to “put your two cents in” but it’s only a “penny for your thoughts” where’s that extra penny going to... why does The Alphabet Song and Twinkle Twinkle Little Star have the same tune... why did you just try to sing those two previous songs... and just what exactly is Victoria’s secret? and where is Waldo?... Can you hear me now?...and do you really think I am this witty?? ... I actually got this from a friend, who stole it from her brother’s girlfriend’s, uncle’s cousin’s who lived next door to an old class mate’s mailman...Now it is your turn to take it from me... Copy and Paste, change the age, and enjoy your day. I needed the laugh. Have an awesome 2019!"
The above from Lorna has the following reply from I assume is a member of P&B

Most of those have a perfectly reasonable answer.

[ajwffc]

Everyone's favourite poet has had a lot of time on their hands
One last one before the bells later on.
Happy new year when it comes.

Who remembers New Years eve
When we sat round the blazing fire
Glasses clinking, merry songs
Children brought down prior
To the bells, to welcome in
Another Hogmanay
Ever so excited
In the usual childish way.
Someone stood outside the door
With lump of coal to bring
At the stroke of midnight
While Andy Stewart would sing
‘Come in, Come in
It’s nice tae see you’
Everyone was there
They all knew what to do
To keep the bad luck from the house
All through the year to come
And keep the home fire burning
Up the lum.
And all the house was cleaned up
Before, from end to end
Cause that was what you did then
Let’s not pretend.
It was hard work
But worth it all
Then you’d be ready
For a New Year call.
Aye, New Year was a good time
But Hogmanay was what
We folk in Scotland called it
We liked it, aye a lot.
For Auld Lang Syne we’ll meet again
Wherever we may be
In the flesh or in our thoughts
Folk will always see.
This time of year just at the bells
With family, friends and all
Is just the time to celebrate
And really have a ball.
Let’s share a toast this New Years Eve
And make this heartfelt vow
To think of loved ones gone but not
Forgotten, here and now.
Let’s have a happy new year
Filled with peace and joy
Around the world this coming year
For every man, woman,girl and boy.
Lorna Johnston.

[resk]

Pretty much everything on Facebook today.

[ICTChris]

[Bully Wee Villa]

Wid. 

[throbber]

[carpetmonster]

Wid

[philpy]

Decided to jack FB as it's getting worse, especially with all the new year resolutions pish. Sitting have a pint, and the wife is trying to show me every fucking quote/picture thing that appears on her page.

[Gaz FFC]

Posted today.

Original post is Sept 2014

No wonder Brexit happened when you read and believe this.

Best part is some belief that once we kick out these nasty foreigners (who probably didn't come from Europe) then pensioners will get £25k a year.

[Torpar]

On 1/3/2019 at 12:53, philpy said:

Decided to jack FB as it's getting worse, especially with all the new year resolutions pish. Sitting have a pint, and the wife is trying to show me every fucking quote/picture thing that appears on her page.

Good, you were the worst male friend I had for sharing pointless pish

[throbber]

[Boghead ranter]

11 hours ago, throbber said:

That reminds me, I can't wait for May 4th to come round again.

[Shotgun]

3 hours ago, Boghead ranter said:

That reminds me, I can't wait for May 4th to come round again.

Oh god, that's  less than a year away, isn't it?

[Swarley]

Oh god, that's  less than a year away, isn't it?

Seems to be earlier and earlier each year