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kiwififer

Out of the mouth of babes...

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I've noticed my wife asking me this a lot recently -

"What should I say back to *person*?"

Without actually telling me what they've said in the first place.  3 times this week she's done this.

 

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My wife does that too. She seems to forget that she's the one who has actual social skills while I'm an anti-social IT professional. How the hell should I know what to say?

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And when you do give them something to say "Well I can't say that" 

Why bloody ask? 

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I've just spent the best part of ten minutes explaining to Maw Sanchez how Eurovision voting works.

Each country gets 1 to 12 points.

Yes.

Those are based on the jury votes.

Yes.

So how does the public give them 1 point or 200 points?

Each country's public votes are scored in the same way as the jury votes, then added together and announced at once.

792307.jpg

Cue at least four goes of me saying the same thing before it goes in. 

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12 minutes ago, Miguel Sanchez said:

I've just spent the best part of ten minutes explaining to Maw Sanchez how Eurovision voting works.

Each country gets 1 to 12 points.

Yes.

Those are based on the jury votes.

Yes.

So how does the public give them 1 point or 200 points?

Each country's public votes are scored in the same way as the jury votes, then added together and announced at once.

792307.jpg

Cue at least four goes of me saying the same thing before it goes in. 

I don't understand. And you are too interested in Eurovision.

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1 minute ago, Bold Rover said:

I don't understand. And you are too interested in Eurovision.

And worryingly he watches it with his maw.

Probably in the buff.

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2 hours ago, Melanius Mullarkey said:

And worryingly he watches it with his maw.

Probably in the buff.

:lol: Photies or gtf.  

On second thoughts, nah.

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At the zoo yesterday and we were trying to remember the name of the different types of penguins.

Wife: "Kingfisher"

Me: "No, that's not a type of penguin"

Wife: "Yeah, you're right, that's a bird"

Me, pointing at a penguin : "So's that"

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Mrs could be a sports commentator. She saw Deontay Wilder’s latest victim getting smeared over the canvas and said “it must get really boring for him knocking people out so quickly”

 

92392E54-06FE-43DA-9302-1A27442C3FF6.gif

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7 minutes ago, Shandon Par said:

Mrs could be a sports commentator. She saw Deontay Wilder’s latest victim getting smeared over the canvas and said “it must get really boring for him knocking people out so quickly”

 

92392E54-06FE-43DA-9302-1A27442C3FF6.gif

I'm not a massive boxing fan or particularly knowledgeable about it but when I first saw that embarrassing KO the first thing I thought of was Marsellus Wallace having a word in Breazeale's ear before the fight. 

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Mrs could be a sports commentator. She saw Deontay Wilder’s latest victim getting smeared over the canvas and said “it must get really boring for him knocking people out so quickly”
 
92392E54-06FE-43DA-9302-1A27442C3FF6.gif.e3d0f5cd79956c93630f080da03c7b72.gif
I know wheres shes coming from tbh. You wouldnt understand.....

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Her (reading an article): This is interesting it's saying this thing called koh is good for cleaning.

Me: how do you spell it?

Her: KOH

Me: That's potassium hydroxide. It's lye.

Her: It's not a lie it says so here!

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47 minutes ago, MixuFixit said:

Her (reading an article): This is interesting it's saying this thing called koh is good for cleaning.

Me: how do you spell it?

Her: KOH

Me: That's potassium hydroxide. It's lye.

Her: It's not a lie it says so here!

HE'S NOT FINISHED, HE'S ONLY 28!!

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"Did cavemen drink coffee?".

I’m not certain I believe everything you write about what your wife says, but if true, she is as thick as f**k.

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8 minutes ago, Brother Blades said:


I’m not certain I believe everything you write about what your wife says, but if true, she is as thick as f**k.

I suppose I should be proud that she thinks I will know, without resorting to googling on my phone, who designed Boney M's outfits or what cavemen drank for breakfast, or what the difference is between the sun or the moon. 

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I suppose I should be proud that she thinks I will know, without resorting to googling on my phone, who designed Boney M's outfits or what cavemen drank for breakfast, or what the difference is between the sun or the moon. 

Fair do’s, she must be some ride, I couldn’t put up with that shite tbf.

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Just now, Brother Blades said:


Fair do’s, she must be some ride, I couldn’t put up with that shite tbf.

Nae takin though.

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4 minutes ago, Brother Blades said:


Fair do’s, she must be some ride, I couldn’t put up with that shite tbf.

She makes good cakes too. 

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23 minutes ago, Shandon Par said:

"Did cavemen drink coffee?".

If they lived in Ethiopia and had invented fire, they might well have.

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