Shandon Par Posted October 3, 2022 Share Posted October 3, 2022 I’ve painted a random person’s front door and a random person’s windows. In both cases they were white to start with anyway and ended up more white and a bit smarter. Still wonder if the folk on either place ever noticed. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zetterlund Posted October 3, 2022 Share Posted October 3, 2022 I went to the scrappies for a part years ago and ended up stripping the dash out of the boy in the office's car. Imagine not seeing the potential problem with driving an old banger to your job in a scrapyard and parking it next to piles of other old bangers. 8 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scottsdad Posted October 4, 2022 Share Posted October 4, 2022 14 hours ago, Shandon Par said: I’ve painted a random person’s front door and a random person’s windows. In both cases they were white to start with anyway and ended up more white and a bit smarter. Still wonder if the folk on either place ever noticed. They'll be pissed off when they try to look out their windows and somebody has come along and painted all over them. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shandon Par Posted October 11, 2022 Share Posted October 11, 2022 episode #465 of Mrs Par not Onowing the difference between sun, moon etc.. Currently somewhere on an island far, far south of Fife… “When will we see the sunrise?” We won’t, we are facing west and there are big mountains behind us, I explain. ”Yeah but the moon was up there not long ago” she fires back. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mathematics Posted October 11, 2022 Share Posted October 11, 2022 Just asked Mrs Mathematics what her favourite rap song is: Ini Kamoze: here comes the hotsteppa. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
beesher Posted October 17, 2022 Share Posted October 17, 2022 On holiday in Cyprus and there was a wee quiz on, me and the mrs performed terribly. We were out in a bar the next night and she says we should brush up on our general knowledge for the next quiz (not seriously it was just a daft way to pass a bit of time when we were sitting drinking). her: ‘what do you call a group of cows?’ me: ‘a herd’ her: ‘no…a murder’ 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
peasy23 Posted October 17, 2022 Share Posted October 17, 2022 Just asked Mrs Mathematics what her favourite rap song is: Ini Kamoze: here comes the hotsteppa.Can't see any mention of that song now without thinking of this. 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Florentine_Pogen Posted October 17, 2022 Share Posted October 17, 2022 On 03/10/2022 at 20:54, Zetterlund said: I went to the scrappies for a part years ago and ended up stripping the dash out of the boy in the office's car. Imagine not seeing the potential problem with driving an old banger to your job in a scrapyard and parking it next to piles of other old bangers. This is epic.....howling like feck................ 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bold Rover Posted October 18, 2022 Share Posted October 18, 2022 9 hours ago, beesher said: On holiday in Cyprus and there was a wee quiz on, me and the mrs performed terribly. We were out in a bar the next night and she says we should brush up on our general knowledge for the next quiz (not seriously it was just a daft way to pass a bit of time when we were sitting drinking). her: ‘what do you call a group of cows?’ me: ‘a herd’ her: ‘no…a murder’ A muder of cows, pehaps? 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hk blues Posted October 18, 2022 Share Posted October 18, 2022 9 hours ago, beesher said: On holiday in Cyprus and there was a wee quiz on, me and the mrs performed terribly. We were out in a bar the next night and she says we should brush up on our general knowledge for the next quiz (not seriously it was just a daft way to pass a bit of time when we were sitting drinking). her: ‘what do you call a group of cows?’ me: ‘a herd’ her: ‘no…a murder’ Maybe she misherd you? 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shandon Par Posted October 20, 2022 Share Posted October 20, 2022 At my mum’s funeral. Mrs goes up to this lady and says “Hello, I’m Shandon’s wife. How did you know his mum? Are you an old work colleague?”. “No” she says. “She and I were friends and then he dumped my daughter to go out with you”. 13 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Melanius Mullarkey Posted October 20, 2022 Share Posted October 20, 2022 On 17/10/2022 at 23:06, beesher said: On holiday in Cyprus and there was a wee quiz on, me and the mrs performed terribly. We were out in a bar the next night and she says we should brush up on our general knowledge for the next quiz (not seriously it was just a daft way to pass a bit of time when we were sitting drinking). her: ‘what do you call a group of cows?’ me: ‘a herd’ her: ‘no…a murder’ Did she work in an abattoir with a hammer by any chance? 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
strichener Posted October 20, 2022 Share Posted October 20, 2022 4 hours ago, Shandon Par said: At my mum’s funeral. Mrs goes up to this lady and says “Hello, I’m Shandon’s wife. How did you know his mum? Are you an old work colleague?”. “No” she says. “She and I were friends and then he dumped my daughter to go out with you”. To which Mrs Shandon responded - "Let your daughter know she was the lucky one." 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shandon Par Posted October 20, 2022 Share Posted October 20, 2022 2 hours ago, strichener said: To which Mrs Shandon responded - "Let your daughter know she was the lucky one." She definitely dodged a bullet! 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bairnardo Posted November 22, 2022 Share Posted November 22, 2022 Belter today..."There's been an earthquake in India.... Well, Indonesia but that's the same place eh?""Ehhhhh.... No. No it isn't. "Well thats confusing, they shouldn't be called the same then!""Eh.... They arent""Aye but I thought India was short for Indonesia"*fucking hell* 10 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
coprolite Posted November 22, 2022 Share Posted November 22, 2022 39 minutes ago, Bairnardo said: Belter today... "There's been an earthquake in India.... Well, Indonesia but that's the same place eh?" "Ehhhhh.... No. No it isn't. "Well thats confusing, they shouldn't be called the same then!" "Eh.... They arent" "Aye but I thought India was short for Indonesia" *fucking hell* Have you explained Australia and Austria? 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shandon Par Posted November 22, 2022 Share Posted November 22, 2022 (edited) Some Attenborough nature show on TV. He’s talking to a CG dinosoaur. ”wow, where did they get that dinosaur from?” asks Mrs. Edited November 22, 2022 by Shandon Par 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Curmudgeon Posted November 22, 2022 Share Posted November 22, 2022 5 hours ago, Shandon Par said: Some Attenborough nature show on TV. He’s talking to a CG dinosoaur. ”wow, where did they get that dinosaur from?” asks Mrs. He's been doing nature programmes on the BBC for decades. 15 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bully Wee Villa Posted November 22, 2022 Share Posted November 22, 2022 Yep. You missed an open goal there. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shandon Par Posted November 27, 2022 Share Posted November 27, 2022 Watching some boxing on tv.. Mrs: “who is that?” Me: “George Groves. He was a decent super middleweight” Mrs “Supernoodle weight?” 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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