Boo Khaki Posted December 9, 2021 Share Posted December 9, 2021 (edited) The end credits are rolling having just watched an episode of 'Unsolved Mysteries', and she pipes up with - "I hate how you never find out what happened at the end" My retort of "You need the series Solved Mysteries for that" did not go down well. Edited December 9, 2021 by Boo Khaki 6 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WhiteRoseKillie Posted December 9, 2021 Share Posted December 9, 2021 On 27/09/2021 at 14:58, Jacksgranda said: One and a half beasts 665.95 - retail price of the Beast. 666.000 - the High-precision Beast. 666i - BMW of the Beast. 333- The Semi-Christ. (shamelessly nicked from Bing Hitler's Tron set) 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Richey Edwards Posted December 23, 2021 Share Posted December 23, 2021 My 10 year old nephew is here and sitting playing FIFA. Out of the blue, he turned to me and said "do you know that Joe died?" I know a couple of people called Joe, so I asked which Joe he meant. "JOE MAMMA" he replied. So basically, I got trolled by a ten year old. 9 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Minertaur Posted December 23, 2021 Share Posted December 23, 2021 My brother in law got one of those Krups beer machines for the house. A couple weeks ago discussing Christmas presents I suggested we order a couple of bottles for him. I'm told by my wife and her sister that it's not a good idea. Last night. My wife turns to me and says: "is there anywhere online that would deliver the beer bottles for Will?" "it's not on Amazon so no chance it arrives before Christmas - that's why I said to order months ago" "well why didn't you order?" 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scottsdad Posted December 31, 2021 Share Posted December 31, 2021 Talking about a meek workmate of hers... "wouldn't say boo to a ghost" 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FuzzyBear Posted December 31, 2021 Share Posted December 31, 2021 9 minutes ago, scottsdad said: Talking about a meek workmate of hers... "wouldn't say boo to a ghost" Loads of folk say that - does my head in 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FK1Bairn Posted January 3, 2022 Share Posted January 3, 2022 She was showing me an article earlier today about twins who were born either side of midnight meaning one has a 2021 birthdate and the other a 2022 birthdate. Because they have different birth dates she believed they couldn't be classed as twins 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
alta-pete Posted January 7, 2022 Share Posted January 7, 2022 Watching The Chase this evening and the contestants set a score of 15. Then Big Anne comes on to chase them down. ‘Why is the Chaser getting it so easy this time? Last time they had to get to 21?’ Trying to explain the mechanics of how the game works after it has been on the telly (for what, 15 years?) has proved rather more difficult than expected. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shandon Par Posted January 15, 2022 Share Posted January 15, 2022 New phone arrived for Mrs. ”if you die, do you think if I take it in to the shop they’d set it up for me?” Good morning to you too dear. 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sergeant Wilson Posted January 15, 2022 Share Posted January 15, 2022 3 minutes ago, Shandon Par said: New phone arrived for Mrs. ”if you die, do you think if I take it in to the shop they’d set it up for me?” Good morning to you too dear. I wouldn't even make your dinner until you actually come in. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shandon Par Posted January 15, 2022 Share Posted January 15, 2022 24 minutes ago, Sergeant Wilson said: I wouldn't even make your dinner until you actually come in. She wouldn’t make my dinner full stop. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sergeant Wilson Posted January 15, 2022 Share Posted January 15, 2022 1 minute ago, Shandon Par said: She wouldn’t make my dinner full stop. I would normally say you could do better, but in your case it would be untrue. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shandon Par Posted January 15, 2022 Share Posted January 15, 2022 2 minutes ago, Sergeant Wilson said: I would normally say you could do better, but in your case it would be untrue. My granny used to sit her down and earnestly tell her she was far too good for me and that she could do better. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
buchan30 Posted January 16, 2022 Share Posted January 16, 2022 New phone arrived for Mrs. ”if you die, do you think if I take it in to the shop they’d set it up for me?” Good morning to you too dear.Sounds like she’s planning for you to have another “accident” 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
coprolite Posted January 18, 2022 Share Posted January 18, 2022 Spent some quality bonding time with my 11 year old at the weekend, teaming up to rip the piss out of the wife for claiming that ivor the engine was one of Thomas the Tank engine's mates. Fairly low level faux pas which she made worse by doubling down and insisting we look up. 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shandon Par Posted January 19, 2022 Share Posted January 19, 2022 Our house trolling Mrs Par 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Oystercatcher Posted January 19, 2022 Share Posted January 19, 2022 Last week Mrs oystercatcher said, "He doesn't know if it's shrove Tuesday or pancake Wednesday" 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shandon Par Posted January 23, 2022 Share Posted January 23, 2022 “You know, if I was a psycho I could cut your cock off in your sleep” 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BFTD Posted January 23, 2022 Share Posted January 23, 2022 17 minutes ago, Shandon Par said: “You know, if I was a psycho I could cut your cock off in your sleep” Best sort the light situation out sharpish. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sergeant Wilson Posted January 23, 2022 Share Posted January 23, 2022 1 hour ago, Shandon Par said: “You know, if I was a psycho I could cut your cock off in your sleep” You'd probably cut your own off. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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