Jump to content

Out of the mouth of babes...


kiwififer

Recommended Posts

Sat around the other day bored, we stuck on Challenge on the TV for a laugh. An episode of Bruce's Play your cards right from 1996 comes on, cue her saying 'He's no changed a bit eh?' 

 

We were at a Haven park with the wee one for a wee weekend break last week too. Bear in mind there's loads of Haven's across the country. She believed the people inside the characters (Barney Bear and the gang) costumes are employed specifically to play the part. She couldn't work out in her head how it was possible for all 6 of them to get around and do all these shows.

I obviously told her that the likelihood is, every park has all the costumes in a back room and that it's just part of the staff duties to do the shows in them.  Apparently that was stupid and a real waste of money.

Edited by Connor1874
Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • 2 weeks later...

My 5 year old daughter just said to me "You promised you'd show us your willie books!!" 

After a moment of utter panic I realised she meant my Oor Wullie annuals.  The kids got their picture taken with one of the sculptures at Silverburn yesterday and I told them I had books of his at home. 

Edited by KnightswoodBear
Link to comment
Share on other sites

56 minutes ago, KnightswoodBear said:

My 5 year old daughter just said to me "You promised you'd show us your willie books!!" 

After a moment of utter panic I realised she meant my Oor Wullie annuals.  The kids got their picture taken with one of the sculptures at Silverburn yesterday and I told them I had books of his at home. 

Ha. What a humorous misunderstanding! 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

2 hours ago, KnightswoodBear said:

My 5 year old daughter just said to me "You promised you'd show us your willie books!!" 

After a moment of utter panic I realised she meant my Oor Wullie annuals.  The kids got their picture taken with one of the sculptures at Silverburn yesterday and I told them I had books of his at home. 

Expect this to appear as the comic strip in the Sunday Post next week as a humouros misunderstanding between the bairn, the family and Granpa that they are so fond of doing

Edited by Wile E Coyote
Link to comment
Share on other sites

We drove up to Perth recently and just before the roundabout at the Porsche garage there’s a road sign with “the earth is flat” scrawled over it in spray paint.   The kids and I had a wee chuckle about it, when I then turned to the wife I could see that she was deep in thought.  As I could hear the gears turning in her head I burst out laughing, the following is word for word.

me: f**k right off,  you can’t be serious

wife: no, no I know the earths not flat, I’m not fucking stupid.

me: what you thinking about then?

wife: was just wondering, how long have we known it’s not flat?

me: - silence, waiting in anticipation...................

wife : like 30 years or something?

tears and snotters everywhere. 

My 14yo in the back is crying and choking with laughter, stammering out “Galileo!!!!!Galileo!!!!” In between gasps.

Edited by the aggressive beggar
Link to comment
Share on other sites

3 hours ago, KnightswoodBear said:

My 5 year old daughter just said to me "You promised you'd show us your willie books!!" 

After a moment of utter panic I realised she meant my Oor Wullie annuals.  The kids got their picture taken with one of the sculptures at Silverburn yesterday and I told them I had books of his at home. 

^^^ Getting his defence in before the polis come round.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

5 hours ago, the aggressive beggar said:

We drove up to Perth recently and just before the roundabout at the Porsche garage there’s a road sign with “the earth is flat” scrawled over it in spray paint.   The kids and I had a wee chuckle about it, when I then turned to the wife I could see that she was deep in thought.  As I could hear the gears turning in her head I burst out laughing, the following is word for word.

me: f**k right off,  you can’t be serious

wife: no, no I know the earths not flat, I’m not fucking stupid.

me: what you thinking about then?

wife: was just wondering, how long have we known it’s not flat?

me: - silence, waiting in anticipation...................

wife : like 30 years or something?

tears and snotters everywhere. 

My 14yo in the back is crying and choking with laughter, stammering out “Galileo!!!!!Galileo!!!!” In between gasps.

Shocking language in the company of children.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Watching England vs Cameroon in the Women’s World Cup earlier. Trying to figure out where Cameroon is, she asks “I take it they’re from near Africa or something?”

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Driving on Saturday, my wife had to pop into a shop while me and my two boys stayed in the car. I put on some kids songs from youtube on my phone to appease the youngest one.

As I was doing that I opened my window as it was stifling. My eldest (6) said to me "Why are you opening the window Daddy, is that to let the internet in?"

Link to comment
Share on other sites

My wife has quite a fear of birds, even screaming out if one flies close to her. Anyway, we were watching a wildlife show about Antarctica and she says that she loves penguins, so cute etc.

 

Me: "I thought you didn't like birds?"

Her: "Penguins aren't birds".

Me: "Yes they are".

Her: "But they swim and don't fly".

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

Loading...
  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    • No registered users viewing this page.
×
×
  • Create New...