Living with a Woman

[JMDP]

Don't get pressured into it, just do what you feel what's right. If you've got a decent relationship it should work well, if not, t'll be a nightmare.

I lived with my ex for about two years - six months in Sweden and 18 months here - and it was great. We were both pretty young(I was 22, she was 23) and seemed like the natural thing. It was strange at first after living with three male flatmates for 5 years, but I got used to it pretty quickly.

I've been living with my current girfriend for just over a year. Never really had the choice, she was only my flatmate when I moved in.

Good luck whatever you do.

[city_gord]

I moved in with my Mrs after a year of seeing her. I too had concerns about it as I had lived with friends for the last 4 years. What scared me the most was knowing that moving in with her meant, all going well, she would be the person I live with for the rest of my life. I had a great laugh over the previous 4 years living in different places with different people, and the thought of living with the bird forever scared the shit out of me.

Its now 16 months we have lived together and I dont regret it one bit (mainly cause we live a lot closer to my work!), and there has not been any mention of marriage/kids as of yet. I say just go for it. Whats the worst that can happen...?

[Guest]

The mooses has been hinting a couple of times about renting a place together and it alarms me slightly. I've seen a mate get a woman and have moved in and been wed in under a year.

For those who are in serious relationships (living with someone, engaged, married etc) when did your woman start talking about such craziness?

What would people consider a reasonable length of time in between these things? I was discussing this with my housemate and he said a lot sooner then I thought on the moving in together thing. I said i'd wait at the very least a year but he claimed he'd happily move in with a woman anywhere between 3-6 months into the relationship.

It wouldn't be any more or less convenient money wise. I guess it'd save her time trailing to my house most days but then on the other hand she wouldn't sit watching Neighbours with me listening to the indecent things i'd like to do to Donna.

Now don't get me wrong, i'd miss the woman if she were to go & we do get on very well. I would equally though miss living with a mate.

I don't have any advice to offer you about your misses but it sounds like your flatmate wants you out pronto.

[BalhamPar]

Next time she hints, don't pretend you haven't heard, or act non-committal. Just be honest with her and tell her you're not ready for that yet. It doesn't mean you don't love her, but it's a big step you have to be sure about. If she goes off the hook about it then you'd have to consider whether she's the one for you.

I'd been with my other half for 18 months when she suggested it, but I simply wasn't ready and told her so. She was cool about it (obviously, I'm a catch) and we moved in together last August after 3 years of being together. I was definitely ready by then and it's gone really well. So my advice is bide your time.

[Tryfield]

I was never going near the co-habitation/wedding thing, not a chance. But when I met the wife I knew that was it, no doubt.

Bet it was the chebs that did it.

[rajpelt]

Lived with 3 burds, suffice to say it's a safe bet that the sexy jammies will quickly change to comfy jammies, candles will appear in random places. The bit I missed the most was the random acts of stupidness when I lived myself, for example you notice a titanic match in the blue square premier is on and you've had a shite day at work, before you know it there is 13 of you in your living room downing cans and eating takeaway on a Tuesday night.

[kiwififer]

Lived with 3 burds, suffice to say it's a safe bet that the sexy jammies will quickly change to comfy jammies, candles will appear in random places.

Oh I hear you brother! The babydoll never sees the light of day, you seem to end up watching Eastenders for some strange reason and you every month, you have a night doing the budget together.

You know what though? I love every minute of it, and I wouldn't swap it for all the tea in China.

Oh aye, you get access to stuff from Clarins, sex is on tap and yer diet will improve

[Lisa Cuddy]

Oh I hear you brother! The babydoll never sees the light of day, you seem to end up watching Eastenders for some strange reason and you every month, you have a night doing the budget together.

You know what though? I love every minute of it, and I wouldn't swap it for all the tea in China.

Oh aye, you get access to stuff from Clarins, sex is on tap and yer diet will improve

Stop lying to the lad!

When you move in with a woman, the other thing that happens once a month is that you become the most annoying person on the planet. I know what you're thinking, but you're wrong. It's not PMT. It's you.

[rajpelt]

Oh I hear you brother! The babydoll never sees the light of day, you seem to end up watching Eastenders for some strange reason and you every month, you have a night doing the budget together.

You know what though? I love every minute of it, and I wouldn't swap it for all the tea in China.

Oh aye, you get access to stuff from Clarins, sex is on tap and yer diet will improve

Towels that your not allowed to use, explain that one to me. Current missus moved in, chuck out my fave towel (you know the one, got it free in Magaluf, covered in various team-mates blood stains and of course those cosy sat afternoon before Jeff Sterling stains) Anyway, I'm digressing, she chucked that out, bought new fluffy ones that I have been banned from touching!?!?

[thejailender]

The mooses has been hinting a couple of times about renting a place together and it alarms me slightly.

Your doomed !

The fact that she is hinting means that she is ready for the big step. If you don't decide to get a house together then she will simply step by step start moving into your house.

After her nightly stays become more frequent, the first thing you will notice is a couple of cusions appearing on the sofa.... Then probably a new duvet cover / bed sheets (most likely with a floral design). Once a few candles begin to appear it's too late... The final sign that she has "officially moved in" is when random shells/pebbles start appearing in the bathroom.

One good thing about living together is that you lose the need for the decision making part of your brain, because she'll make all the decisions for you

[chico]

Just cause no-ones said it yet 'get her pumped.'

before you move the bint in, check if she can iron, work a washing machine and cook without a microwave.

[kiwififer]

Stop lying to the lad!

alright, Saturday night becomes 'cuddle night', you retreat into the laptop to watch the Pacific while she hogs the telly for Shortland Street, you eat far, far too much salad than is normal for a man, you have to take turns at ironing and you she ends up shouting 'ELBOWS' at you at 2 in the morning when you are turning in yer sleep (which wakes you up).

We role play actually now - we pretend we're married. She goes to bed early with a headache, and I sit up surfing the net for porn.

[Middleton Mouse]

It was around 7 months after we started seeing each other that Steven moved in with me. Then again we were kind of forced as he ill at the time and really needed someone who could make meals etc.

Chances are if he hadn't been so ill we'd have waited a wee while as I'd only moved into my flat about 4 months earlier and I'd have liked more time to enjoy it on my own.

It's not been a problem mind you as we get on well aside from when I'm hormonal. The one thing I'd suggest though is learn how to do housework properly, this has been a big problem with all the males I've lived with. You lads just don't seem to have a clue how to do much more than hang the washing out and do the dishes.

[Is that my @rse?]

Me and my OH have been together just over four years, and he's only just moved in. Going well so far, but I'll get back to you in a week

To the OP: I would say, like others, if you're having to ask other people then it's quite clear you don't feel ready. If you were ready it would just feel right. Cliche perhaps, but it's not a good idea to move in together too soon. It doesn't necessarily mean the relationship's not going anywhere, I don't agree with the people who've said that. You maybe just need a while to get to know each other's annoying habits before you're stuck with them every single day. You need to know exactly what to expect from each other, otherwise you're doomed to failure.

[Monster]

Bet it was the chebs that did it.

Pished again?

[Law Stud]

Is that how people do it these days?

"Hmm, I fancy her"

"Want a shag"

"Ooh that was alright, lets live together"

"You're dumped......hang on though I just need to pack my bags and go live on the street corner"

I thank f**k my life was less complicated. I met my wife, then after several years of being together the next natural step was to get engaged, and then to find a place that would be our marital home. I lived in the house on my own for two years, and then the wife moved in with me after the wedding.

[djchapsticks]

I've been with my girlfriend coming up on 4 years this July. I'm finally moving in with her this October (after holiday to Florida), she said she'd have done it a year ago, but like others, I enjoy my own space. Still, I'm 26 now, think it's time to finally grow up and enter the everyday adult world of running a household.

[Reynard]

I met the wife. We started going out. We got engaged. We arranged to get married. We bought a flat. We got married. We moved in together. None of it seemed all that traumatic a decision to make.

[Nick_BCFC]

Yes thanks. I don't really want to move in with her (yet). I was more curious as to when other people's women started mentioning it. I'll not be going anywhere for the forseeable future nor will she be coming to live with me.

[stuart.]

I think people are bonkers to consider living with a woman, I think people are stark raving mad to get married too however. And have children, what's that all about? The true strong ones in society are the ones that can make it on their own!!