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1 hour ago, Mr. Alli said:

Got pulled up in work by a colleague because this week (and the past 20 years) I've been screeching "Oh bless your heart, on my soul" 

THE SONG IS EVEN CALLED PLACE YOUR HANDS. 

Idiot. 

 

Used to know a lassie who was convinced Deacon Blue were singing about a chute called Dignity.

Didn't even get it when I asked how you could sail a chute up the West Coast.

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4 hours ago, Boghead ranter said:

Used to know a lassie who was convinced Deacon Blue were singing about a chute called Dignity.

Didn't even get it when I asked how you could sail a chute up the West Coast.

Who sang "chikka chikka Sam Shady" at school to the ridicule of his peers?

<<< this c**t

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My uncle sang "We'll drink tequila and look facetious, now doesn't that sound sweet?" to the song Jessie.

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"Woah-oh here she comes,
Watch out boy, she'll cheer you up,
Woah-oh here she comes,
She's a maneater."

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43 minutes ago, bennett said:

 

I'll have chips with chips..

 

E3mtY-uWEAEm6fB?format=jpg&name=900x900

 

Does the vegetable burger not come in a bun?

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7 hours ago, Mr. Alli said:

Got pulled up in work by a colleague because this week (and the past 20 years) I've been screeching "Oh bless your heart, on my soul" 

THE SONG IS EVEN CALLED PLACE YOUR HANDS. 

Idiot. 

 

'My Lovers got no money, he's got his Trumbelice'

What the f**k is a Trumbelice?

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'My Lovers got no money, he's got his Trumbelice'
What the f**k is a Trumbelice?
Might be a brand of domestic appliance? After all, isn't the chorus "Freed from desire, do you sell air purifiers?"

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I'll have chips with chips..
 
E3mtY-uWEAEm6fB?format=jpg%26name=900x900&key=724408c9fc896adf5ef442d36e92515f264d625930676c65ea4fd7f413d6ff8f
 
If they've specified the cod is fresh I'd steer clear of the plaice...

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I'll have chips with chips..
 
E3mtY-uWEAEm6fB?format=jpg%26name=900x900&key=724408c9fc896adf5ef442d36e92515f264d625930676c65ea4fd7f413d6ff8f
 
Cheese without chips is cheaper than chips without chips.

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The chippy I was in the other week had a Chip Supper on the menu, I assume they just meant a large bag of chips.

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1 hour ago, johnnydun said:

'My Lovers got no money, he's got his Trumbelice'

What the f**k is a Trumbelice?

That was another one I've had. My lover had a trampoline though. 

Same with "is this luv?" by Bob Marley. I got huckled in a hoose perty for going on about a "roof rack over my head". 

Thought the song was about being in love with his car. 

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43 minutes ago, parsforlife said:

Tbf if someone asks for chips without chips they deserve to be charged

They will be.  £1.90

ETA does a bag of chips really cost £1.90 these days?

Edited by Left Back

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59 minutes ago, parsforlife said:

Tbf if someone asks for chips without chips they deserve to be charged

Do you want to share a single sausage?

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I really hope Italy or France win the Euros because they have the best anthems. 

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I really hope Italy or France win the Euros because they have the best anthems. 
They are both fantastic. I hope France win it as I have them in the sweep.

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5 minutes ago, Sergeant Wilson said:

Do you want to share a single sausage?

Oh Serge,  I never thought you’d ask.

 

Sesame Street Fainting GIF

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Jim white has just left sky sports news. He's just announced it's his last night, with a wee compilation.

He's an annoying p***k but that was actually quite nice.

Any idea if he's an arsehole in real life? Or a good guy?

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