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Mrs Biggie is a charge nurse, according to her the sweat off your arse when wiping could contaminate it, and it wouldn't be a 'pure sample'.

I cannot recall the last time I had a sweaty arse whilst having a shite, anyhoo, the doc writes back to you and says(hopefully) 'I could not detect any blood in your stool'

Not, 'you must be a fat b*****d as your shit was diluted by your sweaty arse'

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I cannot recall the last time I had a sweaty arse whilst having a shite, anyhoo, the doc writes back to you and says(hopefully) 'I could not detect any blood in your stool'

Not, 'you must be a fat b*****d as your shit was diluted by your sweaty arse'

f**k knows. I assumed she knew what she was talking about so took her advice.

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