Florentine_Pogen Posted May 27, 2014 Share Posted May 27, 2014 "f**k the Pope !!!" followed by a wee sax rendition of The Sash..........funny then, funny now, funny forever !! 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Enigma Posted May 27, 2014 Share Posted May 27, 2014 Tbh, I quite like that wee sax solo. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
superwellfan Posted May 27, 2014 Share Posted May 27, 2014 Aye, the sax solo was my favourite part too 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tinkerbelle Posted May 27, 2014 Share Posted May 27, 2014 Lockdown at work here in Dundee. Some c***s threatened to go Radio Rental. Are you deid yet? 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bert Raccoon Posted May 27, 2014 Share Posted May 27, 2014 Are you deid yet? Nah, the boy shat it. Mozza got him telt. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
afca32 Posted May 27, 2014 Share Posted May 27, 2014 Just killed a wasp with deodorant. GIRFUY ya filthy scumbag. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dee Man Posted May 27, 2014 Share Posted May 27, 2014 Just killed a wasp with deodorant. GIRFUY ya filthy scumbag. I hope it was Wasps1 and his shite rumours died with him. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hedgecutter Posted May 27, 2014 Share Posted May 27, 2014 Every time I see DA Baracus' new Orgazmo avatar, I get this bloody song stuck in my head... ... and it won't go away. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KD1711 Posted May 27, 2014 Share Posted May 27, 2014 A wee list of things that I've heard constantly the last few days that can get to f**k. 1. Kanye West2. Kim Karjshbdkdndbd3. Their wedding4. Her wedding dress That is all. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CityDave Posted May 27, 2014 Share Posted May 27, 2014 For B-Movie fans Mega Shark vs Crocosaurus is on 4Music Ch18 freeview right now. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CityDave Posted May 27, 2014 Share Posted May 27, 2014 Just killed a wasp with deodorant. GIRFUY ya filthy scumbag. We had a wasps nest in our loft years ago and the buggers were getting in and out through a hole under the guttering but found a way into the bathroom through the hole for one of the pipes, every couple of hours one would be trapped in the bathroom. After taking a shower one evening I realised I was sharing the bathroom with one of them, so I picked up a can of hairspray and sprayed at it. The wasp went mental and into attack mode hovering right in front of my face stinger pointed at me but unable to get close due to the continuous blast from the can. Then suddenly the hairspray on the wasp hardened and it was hurled onto the window sill in a fatal cacoon of Boots own. Teenager vs wasp, teenager won. Now a days I prefer to remove them from the house without harm as they are useful in eating pests like aphids and house flies, same goes for spiders. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hedgecutter Posted May 27, 2014 Share Posted May 27, 2014 We had a wasps nest in our loft years ago and the buggers were getting in and out through a hole under the guttering but found a way into the bathroom through the hole for one of the pipes, every couple of hours one would be trapped in the bathroom. After taking a shower one evening I realised I was sharing the bathroom with one of them, so I picked up a can of hairspray and sprayed at it. The wasp went mental and into attack mode hovering right in front of my face stinger pointed at me but unable to get close due to the continuous blast from the can. Then suddenly the hairspray on the wasp hardened and it was hurled onto the window sill in a fatal cacoon of Boots own. Teenager vs wasp, teenager won. Now a days I prefer to remove them from the house without harm as they are useful in eating pests like aphids and house flies, same goes for spiders. I took out four wasps nests in the garden sheds a couple of weeks ago... with a broom handle. One also went into attack mode but got itself stuck in a spiders web before I beat it to death with a frisbee. Not checked the loft yet... which has a hole leading outside. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zen Archer (Raconteur) Posted May 27, 2014 Share Posted May 27, 2014 I took out four wasps nests in the garden sheds a couple of weeks ago... with a broom handle. One also went into attack mode but got itself stuck in a spiders web before I beat it to death with a frisbee. Not checked the loft yet... which has a hole leading outside. I'm sure you'll be fine, it's the holes leading inside you have to watch. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tinkerbelle Posted May 28, 2014 Share Posted May 28, 2014 Now a days I prefer to remove them from the house without harm as they are useful in eating pests like aphids and house flies, same goes for spiders. I do that also. The guy that has my mums old house had 4 beehives that he kept for the honey. It was mental watching him collecting the honey whilst he was dressed in all the protective gear. The little feckers were always mega angry at him. He got rid of them a couple of weeks ago when a load of them attacked his wife in the garden and tried to create a new nest in her hair. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Smurph Posted May 28, 2014 Share Posted May 28, 2014 Found out yesterday that, directly from the treadmills, I can access the internet - meaning I can tag myself at the gym on Facebook telling people that I'm getting my #gainz on and how much #lifting I'm doing. Pretty dece tbh. Not done it yet though. I was too busy playing solitaire and watching You've Been Framed. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KnightswoodBear Posted May 28, 2014 Share Posted May 28, 2014 I took out four wasps nests in the garden sheds a couple of weeks ago... with a broom handle. One also went into attack mode but got itself stuck in a spiders web before I beat it to death with a frisbee. Not checked the loft yet... which has a hole leading outside. A wasps hive is called a bike, is it not? 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jan Vojáček Posted May 28, 2014 Share Posted May 28, 2014 I hate going to the barbers, always ends up with the same conversation: Barber: "So who do you support" Me: "Dumbarton" Barber: "Aye?" Me: "Aye" *Deathly silence* *Continuation of deathly silence* Barber: "What league are they in" Me: "Championship" Barber: "Aw right, so you'll be looking forward to playing Rangers next year" Me: "Nope not really" *10 minute deathly silence as we both try not to make eye contact in the mirror* I'm going this afternoon and desperately trying to think of interesting/different conversation to spark up. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Swarley Posted May 28, 2014 Share Posted May 28, 2014 I hate going to the barbers, always ends up with the same conversation: Barber: "So who do you support" Me: "Dumbarton" Barber: "Aye?" Me: "Aye" *Deathly silence* *Continuation of deathly silence* Barber: "What league are they in" Me: "Championship" Barber: "Aw right, so you'll be looking forward to playing Rangers next year" Me: "Nope not really" *10 minute deathly silence as we both try not to make eye contact in the mirror* I'm going this afternoon and desperately trying to think of interesting/different conversation to spark up. Tell him you are gay. I'd guess he'd still say something like "Aw, I kent a lad who was gay, followed the Rangers...." 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Florentine_Pogen Posted May 28, 2014 Share Posted May 28, 2014 I hate going to the barbers, always ends up with the same conversation: Barber: "Whit aboot the Hibs, eh" Me: "Dinnae fuckin' start, ya Jambo basturt" Barber: "Well, it wis bound tae happen......" Me: (in pathetic attempt at defensive deflection) "Well at least we went doon in a sportsmanlike Corinthian spirit, unlike youse cheatin', bill dodgin' c*nts. We just happened to be shite...... " *Deathly silence* *Continuation of deathly silence* *Sounds of parents removing children from premises due to bad language* Barber: "Still goat the Derby next season though, eh ?" Me: "Oh aye......cannae wait" Barber: "Be great if the Embra teams absolutely fuckin' stuffed the Sevco and we bounce right back up, eh ?" Me: "That would be lovely" Barber: "D'you ever go oan that Pie n' Bovril forum ?" Me: "Have done...." *10 minute deathly silence as we both try not to make eye contact in the mirror* 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jan Vojáček Posted May 28, 2014 Share Posted May 28, 2014 Well that went as expected... I actually managed to stick to the script I wrote on here almost perfectly, good job my hair takes ages to grow gives me another month and a bit before I need to dread going through that again. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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