Things you want to share with P&B

[Sergeant Wilson]

46 minutes ago, GordonD said:

Hitler probably enjoyed a spag bol when he visited Mussolini though

 

37 minutes ago, sjc said:

As long as it was kosher......

As long as it was vegetarian.

[tamthebam]

16 hours ago, Stellaboz said:

I'd happily burn that man alive.

[Sweaty Morph]

8 hours ago, DA Baracus said:

We've had a new safe put in at work to house various keys. It's one of those ones that required you to input a code to open.

Today the manager was putting the batteries in the door for the panel and was setting up it, which requires a code to be selected.

I made a suggestion to the manager for the code and am pleased to inform you all that the code for the safe in the office is now

  Hide contents

1690

 

 

^^^ Wee team found

[AsimButtHitsASix]

17 hours ago, GordonD said:

Hitler probably enjoyed a spag bol when he visited Mussolini though

Mussolini hated pasta. Thought the introduction of pasta to the Italian diet led to Italian men being less masculine.

He was the original wannabe alpha calling everyone else "Soy boy cucks"

[buchan30]

I had a dream that caused to me wake laughing. I now have the dentist at 10.45, when i am getting treatment my mind tends to wander and i now fear that halfway through my appointment i’m going to think about that dream and be trying to stiffle my laughter.

[GordonD]

6 minutes ago, buchan30 said:

I had a dream that caused to me wake laughing. I now have the dentist at 10.45, when i am getting treatment my mind tends to wander and i now fear that halfway through my appointment i’m going to think about that dream and be trying to stiffle my laughter.

Look on the bright side. Maybe you'll be in so much pain that even seeing Nigel Farage fall down a manhole wouldn't make you laugh

[Bully Wee Villa]

7 hours ago, buchan30 said:

I had a dream that caused to me wake laughing. I now have the dentist at 10.45, when i am getting treatment my mind tends to wander and i now fear that halfway through my appointment i’m going to think about that dream and be trying to stiffle my laughter.

Best thing to do to avoid laughing is spend the whole time concentrating really hard on trying not to get an erection.

Edited November 14, 2018 by Bully Wee Villa

[Hedgecutter]

5 hours ago, GordonD said:

Look on the bright side. Maybe you'll be in so much pain that even seeing Nigel Farage fall down a manhole wouldn't make you laugh

 

I saw a business woman disappear up to her middle in a rain-filled pothole near Wall St, NY last week, no more than 2m in front of me (would have been me otherwise). 

Leg straight down up to waist, followed by her falling onto her back in what you would think was nothing more than a small puddle. Every garment from fancy coat through to knickers undoubtedly soaked through with manky water, exactly what you want in your lunch break.  In an ideal world it would have been nothing but hilarious, but as reality would have it, she had fcuked her ankle and I needed to give her a hand before her friends ahead of her took over the show.

Type of thing straight from a cartoon that I'll probably never see the likes of again.

Edited November 14, 2018 by Hedgecutter

[buchan30]

Best think to do to avoid laughing is spend the whole time concentrating really hard on trying not to get an erection.

If anything i would class going to the dentist as a definite passion killer, don’t have to concentrate on that. Good job, because it was a new dentist i had, really didn’t want him thinking i like going there.

[buchan30]

Look on the bright side. Maybe you'll be in so much pain that even seeing Nigel Farage fall down a manhole wouldn't make you laugh

That would just give me an enormous smile.

[tamthebam]

2 hours ago, Hedgecutter said:

 

I saw a business woman disappear up to her middle in a rain-filled pothole near Wall St, NY last week, no more than 2m in front of me (would have been me otherwise). 

 

Leg straight down up to waist, followed by her falling onto her back in what you would think was nothing more than a small puddle. Every garment from fancy coat through to knickers undoubtedly soaked through with manky water, exactly what you want in your lunch break.  In an ideal world it would have been nothing but hilarious, but as reality would have it, she had fcuked her ankle and I needed to give her a hand before her friends ahead of her took over the show.

 

Type of thing straight from a cartoon that I'll probably never see the likes of again.

 

the capitalist boot should have paid her taxes then.

[Shandon Par]

3 hours ago, Hedgecutter said:

 

I saw a business woman disappear up to her middle in a rain-filled pothole near Wall St, NY last week, no more than 2m in front of me (would have been me otherwise). 

 

Leg straight down up to waist, followed by her falling onto her back in what you would think was nothing more than a small puddle. Every garment from fancy coat through to knickers undoubtedly soaked through with manky water,

 

“And that officer is my story of why I was rolling about the alley with the screaming woman when you found us”. 

[Stellaboz]

 
I saw a business woman disappear up to her middle in a rain-filled pothole near Wall St, NY last week, no more than 2m in front of me (would have been me otherwise). 
Leg straight down up to waist, followed by her falling onto her back in what you would think was nothing more than a small puddle. Every garment from fancy coat through to knickers undoubtedly soaked through with manky water, exactly what you want in your lunch break.  In an ideal world it would have been nothing but hilarious, but as reality would have it, she had fcuked her ankle and I needed to give her a hand before her friends ahead of her took over the show.
Type of thing straight from a cartoon that I'll probably never see the likes of again.

How do you know she was wearing knickers?

[supermik]

42 minutes ago, Stellaboz said:

6 hours ago, Hedgecutter said:

 
I saw a business woman disappear up to her middle in a rain-filled pothole near Wall St, NY last week, no more than 2m in front of me (would have been me otherwise). 
Leg straight down up to waist, followed by her falling onto her back in what you would think was nothing more than a small puddle. Every garment from fancy coat through to knickers undoubtedly soaked through with manky water, exactly what you want in your lunch break.  In an ideal world it would have been nothing but hilarious, but as reality would have it, she had fcuked her ankle and I needed to give her a hand before her friends ahead of her took over the show.
Type of thing straight from a cartoon that I'll probably never see the likes of again.

How do you know she was wearing knickers?

When he tried to pick her up like a bowling ball probably gave it away.

[Bold Rover]

On 13/11/2018 at 15:46, DA Baracus said:

We've had a new safe put in at work to house various keys. It's one of those ones that required you to input a code to open.

Today the manager was putting the batteries in the door for the panel and was setting up it, which requires a code to be selected.

I made a suggestion to the manager for the code and am pleased to inform you all that the code for the safe in the office is now

  Hide contents

1690

 

 

Guess the price of a rail day return Ayr-Hamilton Central.

[Hedgecutter]

1 hour ago, Stellaboz said:

6 hours ago, Hedgecutter said:

 
I saw a business woman disappear up to her middle in a rain-filled pothole near Wall St, NY last week, no more than 2m in front of me (would have been me otherwise). 
Leg straight down up to waist, followed by her falling onto her back in what you would think was nothing more than a small puddle. Every garment from fancy coat through to knickers undoubtedly soaked through with manky water, exactly what you want in your lunch break.  In an ideal world it would have been nothing but hilarious, but as reality would have it, she had fcuked her ankle and I needed to give her a hand before her friends ahead of her took over the show.
Type of thing straight from a cartoon that I'll probably never see the likes of again.

How do you know she was wearing knickers?

A fair point seeing as I've seen The Wolf of Wall Street.

[19QOS19]

Found out I can retire in 2051. Something to look forward to.

[Shandon Par]

3 hours ago, MixuFixit said:

I go cold turkey from time to time but never stick at it. Currently having one coffee in the morning and replacing the rest with swanky cocoa.

Good on you though, sounds like its working well for you.

These are pretty tasty - green tea that tastes like cocoa.

 

Edited November 14, 2018 by Hand As Porn

[Dee Man]

11 minutes ago, 19QOS19 said:

Found out I can retire in 2051. Something to look forward to.

The retirement age will probably be pushed up another 20 years by then. 

[19QOS19]

The retirement age will probably be pushed up another 20 years by then. 

Had a conversation along those lines today actually. An older guy said I'd have a concession card soon enough to which I responded they probably won't exist when I'm his age and I'll not be allowed to retire either.