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2 hours ago, BigFatTabbyDave said:

Time to varnish the fence again while the weather's halfway decent.

Is there any sensible way to put the squirrels off using it as a launch pad while it dries? I'm not erecting a Chernobyl Shroud type monument or anything, but I feel bad that the poor wee buggers might end up with possibly toxic substances on their wee paws.

No, murdering them all beforehand is not an acceptable answer, you monster.

A plastic hawk might do. Or a plastic Smudger.

Of course you'll have to improvise with what you have available in the house although I don't think Squirrel Nutkin is going to be terrified by a blow up doll..

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2 minutes ago, tamthebam said:

A plastic hawk might do. Or a plastic Smudger.

Of course you'll have to improvise with what you have available in the house although I don't think Squirrel Nutkin is going to be terrified by a blow up doll..

Or he could play his Brotherhood of Man CDs at maximum volume - that would make them keep their distance.

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Just now, GordonD said:

Or he could play his Brotherhood of Man CDs at maximum volume - that would make them keep their distance.

I went to a Cowdenbeath v Arbroath game in the late 80s. The pre-match music included "Tie a yellow ribbon". Perhaps they'd just been given a pile of unsold records from the local charity shop 

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8 minutes ago, tamthebam said:

I went to a Cowdenbeath v Arbroath game in the late 80s. The pre-match music included "Tie a yellow ribbon". Perhaps they'd just been given a pile of unsold records from the local charity shop 

I remember back in the day that singing “I Did It My Way” was a favourite by das and uncles at social occasions.

Invariably sang by guys who had done fùck all with their lives and had struggled to achieve that.

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  • I don't have a blow-up doll yet.
  • I don't own any Brotherhood of Man CDs, although I was wondering if Leonard Nimoy might work just as well.

Think I might start in the morning once they've had their morning exercises, drop some nuts down under their trees to keep them occupied, varnish the fence, then start the incinerator going nearby. Fire ought to put them off for the rest of the day, and the heat will help the fence dry.

Alternatively, I could just burn the fucking fence down and eat the nuts. We'll see.

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9 hours ago, tamthebam said:

I went to a Cowdenbeath v Arbroath game in the late 80s. The pre-match music included "Tie a yellow ribbon". Perhaps they'd just been given a pile of unsold records from the local charity shop 

Well, it serves you right.

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59 minutes ago, Raidernation said:

Tie A Yellow Ribbon was by Tony Orlando not BoM

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Aul bugger fa minds the 70s pop music here.

 

Cowdenbeath DJ found

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21 hours ago, BigFatTabbyDave said:

Time to varnish the fence again while the weather's halfway decent.

Is there any sensible way to put the squirrels off using it as a launch pad while it dries? I'm not erecting a Chernobyl Shroud type monument or anything, but I feel bad that the poor wee buggers might end up with possibly toxic substances on their wee paws.

No, murdering them all beforehand is not an acceptable answer, you monster.

Hey simple! Go along to your local supermarket and ask to see their full range of squirrel repellant!

Problem solved. 😀

Actually it might be easier to order some online.

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18 hours ago, BigFatTabbyDave said:
  • I don't have a blow-up doll yet.
  • I don't own any Brotherhood of Man CDs, although I was wondering if Leonard Nimoy might work just as well.

Think I might start in the morning once they've had their morning exercises, drop some nuts down under their trees to keep them occupied, varnish the fence, then start the incinerator going nearby. Fire ought to put them off for the rest of the day, and the heat will help the fence dry.

Alternatively, I could just burn the fucking fence down and eat the nuts. We'll see.

Get a chimney, they fucking love a chimney. Well the Dundonian ones do.

Spoiler

3CA4892A-E7A5-439E-BB68-0944FE5829EF.jpeg.322d7938080188cc27a89f87a89dafe3.jpeg

 

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MOT is due next month (14th June to be specific) so I'm assuming this new grace period will see my car included - have they put an end date on this 6 month rule?

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1 hour ago, Dele said:

813ysZjlllL._AC_SX569_.jpg.deb697a71953a63f45f234fee1bf89f4.jpg

Has anyone tried this stuff? 

Reviews swing from fucking awful to absolutely glorious. 

Americans and Ocado shoppers seem to enjoy it most, Tesco and Brits seem to despise it. 

The drink of choice for Funsters.

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7 minutes ago, Granny Danger said:

The drink of choice for Funsters.

Dundee fans drink refreshing sparkling water. 

Dundee United fans batter their pus in with wine at 10am.

And I guess that why they call them, the blues. 

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Just now, Dele said:

Dundee fans drink refreshing sparkling water. 

Dundee United fans batter their pus in with wine at 10am.

And I guess that why they call them, the blues. 

Ah Dele, you’ve been relaxed these last few weeks and been willing to trade banter.  

What’s happened to set you down this provocative path?

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