Quick Question Thread

[Melanius Mullarkey]

17 minutes ago, Silverton End said:

That's a buttery^^^ jimmy, North East/Moray delicacy, warm it up & apply jam. Other pics were crispy morning rolls, insert a filling (lorne sausage) & enjoy.

Jesus wept

There’s no helping some folk.

[Silverton End]

1 minute ago, Melanius Mullarkey said:

There’s no helping some folk.

Amen to that

[Shandon Par]

2 hours ago, ICTJohnboy said:

I would slide a couple of soft fried eggs into that one.

 

 

[pandarilla]

That's true. *Morton's crispy morning rolls are the business.
 
*nothing to do with greenock morton

I get a dozen of these every time I'm through West and stick them in the freezer.

Fucking glorious.

[heedthebaa]

1 hour ago, Angusfifer said:

Doesn't every decent-sized town in Scotland have a local baker that produces a morning roll these days?

Pretty sad state of affairs if you have to rely on a supermarket... 

Supermarket rolls are decent enough, but the local bakers rolls here are the mutts nuts, 40p each, but worth every penny 

[jimmy boo]

That's a buttery^^^ jimmy, North East/Moray delicacy, warm it up & apply jam. Other pics were crispy morning rolls, insert a filling (lorne sausage) & enjoy.
Jesus wept [emoji38]

And that is the Aldi ones?[emoji106]

[HenryHill]

16 minutes ago, MixuFixit said:

This is a weird one.

My postie has always been a bit hard work, he can't just give you your post, he has to make some shit joke before handing it over. I've always done my best to discourage him by just going "oh right" and never laughing.

Today he knocked on the door and the missus answered. She has a brace on her arm just now and he goes "oh you've hurt your arm" and she explains how she's hurt it picking up our son. He goes "hang on", reaches into his jacket, pulls out a wee box, takes - I shit you not - a wee toy violin out, pretends to play it then hands over our post.

Am I a grumpy auld basturt for thinking this veers into OFTW territory? Has he clocked her brace and brought it specifically to engineer this uncomfortable interaction, or is he a wannabe comedian with a prop for every eventuality? Would you phone up to ask his boss to tell him to stop being such a weirdo and just give us our post, or am I just being a killjoy about an eccentric character?

You cant argue with him as he will just destroy your post. He needs to go straight under the patio.

[Mark Connolly]

20 minutes ago, MixuFixit said:

This is a weird one.

My postie has always been a bit hard work, he can't just give you your post, he has to make some shit joke before handing it over. I've always done my best to discourage him by just going "oh right" and never laughing.

Today he knocked on the door and the missus answered. She has a brace on her arm just now and he goes "oh you've hurt your arm" and she explains how she's hurt it picking up our son. He goes "hang on", reaches into his jacket, pulls out a wee box, takes - I shit you not - a wee toy violin out, pretends to play it then hands over our post.

Am I a grumpy auld basturt for thinking this veers into OFTW territory? Has he clocked her brace and brought it specifically to engineer this uncomfortable interaction, or is he a wannabe comedian with a prop for every eventuality? Would you phone up to ask his boss to tell him to stop being such a weirdo and just give us our post, or am I just being a killjoy about an eccentric character?

The violin bit is quite funny, and I think you're probably a bit annoyed at yourself for not thinking of it.

He does sound a bit odd though.

[GordonD]

33 minutes ago, MixuFixit said:

He goes "hang on", reaches into his jacket, pulls out a wee box, takes - I shit you not - a wee toy violin out, pretends to play it then hands over our post.

Are you going to tell his boss that he's at the fiddle?

[Sergeant Wilson]

40 minutes ago, MixuFixit said:

This is a weird one.

My postie has always been a bit hard work, he can't just give you your post, he has to make some shit joke before handing it over. I've always done my best to discourage him by just going "oh right" and never laughing.

Today he knocked on the door and the missus answered. She has a brace on her arm just now and he goes "oh you've hurt your arm" and she explains how she's hurt it picking up our son. He goes "hang on", reaches into his jacket, pulls out a wee box, takes - I shit you not - a wee toy violin out, pretends to play it then hands over our post.

Am I a grumpy auld basturt for thinking this veers into OFTW territory? Has he clocked her brace and brought it specifically to engineer this uncomfortable interaction, or is he a wannabe comedian with a prop for every eventuality? Would you phone up to ask his boss to tell him to stop being such a weirdo and just give us our post, or am I just being a killjoy about an eccentric character?

Kill him. He'll murder you both in your beds if you don't.

[Dee Man]

46 minutes ago, MixuFixit said:

This is a weird one.

My postie has always been a bit hard work, he can't just give you your post, he has to make some shit joke before handing it over. I've always done my best to discourage him by just going "oh right" and never laughing.

Today he knocked on the door and the missus answered. She has a brace on her arm just now and he goes "oh you've hurt your arm" and she explains how she's hurt it picking up our son. He goes "hang on", reaches into his jacket, pulls out a wee box, takes - I shit you not - a wee toy violin out, pretends to play it then hands over our post.

Am I a grumpy auld basturt for thinking this veers into OFTW territory? Has he clocked her brace and brought it specifically to engineer this uncomfortable interaction, or is he a wannabe comedian with a prop for every eventuality? Would you phone up to ask his boss to tell him to stop being such a weirdo and just give us our post, or am I just being a killjoy about an eccentric character?

Are you Ricky Gervais in After Life?

Seriously though, he sounds like a right creep. I'd go with the advice to kill him.

[NJ2]

Here's a fine example of the species, a slab of orkney mature cheddar in a well fired is a real favourite
 

Stick a lovely scotch pie in that roll and we’re talking!

[Silverton End]

8 minutes ago, NJ2 said:

Stick a lovely scotch pie in that roll and we’re talking!

Wee van at Alloa Athletic does a roll n pie

[Bairnardo]

Stick a lovely scotch pie in that roll and we’re talking!

Thin layer of beans, held on by the rim of pastry... Thats peak.

[mathematics]

1 hour ago, MixuFixit said:

This is a weird one.

My postie has always been a bit hard work, he can't just give you your post, he has to make some shit joke before handing it over. I've always done my best to discourage him by just going "oh right" and never laughing.

Today he knocked on the door and the missus answered. She has a brace on her arm just now and he goes "oh you've hurt your arm" and she explains how she's hurt it picking up our son. He goes "hang on", reaches into his jacket, pulls out a wee box, takes - I shit you not - a wee toy violin out, pretends to play it then hands over our post.

Am I a grumpy auld basturt for thinking this veers into OFTW territory? Has he clocked her brace and brought it specifically to engineer this uncomfortable interaction, or is he a wannabe comedian with a prop for every eventuality? Would you phone up to ask his boss to tell him to stop being such a weirdo and just give us our post, or am I just being a killjoy about an eccentric character?

Two options:

(a) Be a snide w**k and report him;

(b) Knock f**k out of him for insulting your wife.

[welshbairn]

1 hour ago, MixuFixit said:

This is a weird one.

My postie has always been a bit hard work, he can't just give you your post, he has to make some shit joke before handing it over. I've always done my best to discourage him by just going "oh right" and never laughing.

Today he knocked on the door and the missus answered. She has a brace on her arm just now and he goes "oh you've hurt your arm" and she explains how she's hurt it picking up our son. He goes "hang on", reaches into his jacket, pulls out a wee box, takes - I shit you not - a wee toy violin out, pretends to play it then hands over our post.

Am I a grumpy auld basturt for thinking this veers into OFTW territory? Has he clocked her brace and brought it specifically to engineer this uncomfortable interaction, or is he a wannabe comedian with a prop for every eventuality? Would you phone up to ask his boss to tell him to stop being such a weirdo and just give us our post, or am I just being a killjoy about an eccentric character?

Out weird him. Answer the door stark naked and ask what he's got in his pocket this time.

[jimmy boo]

We need a gif of Colin the unfunny office bore from The Fast Show if someone could oblige.

[Guest Moomintroll]

Out weird him. Answer the door stark naked and ask what he's got in his pocket this time.

Would that not be an open goal for him to get the violin out again?

[NJ2]

Wee van at Alloa Athletic does a roll n pie

And yet there’s folk that think Alloa’s success is down to Jim Goodwin?!

Thin layer of beans, held on by the rim of pastry... Thats peak.

Sounds a needless risk imo

[Silverton End]

29 minutes ago, jimmy boo said:

We need a gif of Colin the unfunny office bore from The Fast Show if someone could oblige.