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  1. An old trope but as the theatres are shut which clubs or players would take which roles in a Scottish football pantomime? Cinderella will be played by Queens Park who have gone from rags to riches thanks to Fairy Godmother Willie Haughey Greeting Puss in (football) Boots is being played by Neil Lennon The Genie from Aladdin is Sir Steve Clarke for granting all our wishes to see Scotland qualify for a tournament Baron Hardup is being played by Morton's treasurer The Ugly Sisters are being played by, well, the Ugly Sisters of Scottish football At this point Dundee's vote has just been delivered to audience shouts of "Oh no it isn't, oh yes it is" King Rat by popular choice of the Morton fans is being played by Ray McKinnon The Scottish League management committee are being represented by the 7 Dwarves but all of them are Dopey Rod Petrie's wallet is doubling as Aladdin's Cave but not even the Genie can get it to open
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