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About Leewood

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    Sunday League Starter

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  1. No Surprise that the The Kinky man is hoping England win their first Euro's, in the same year "The_Rangers" finally win their 1st scottish title...
  2. The only people that talk about "55" are Rangers fans amongst themselves. (Things Insecure People Do to Try to Seem Important). Everyone else KNOWS it's the first major trophy the new club "The rangers 2012" have won after 9 banter years of trying.
  3. A guy sits down at a bar. "Is everything okay?" the bartender asks. "My wife and I got into a fight and she said she wasn’t going to talk to me for a month.” The bartender says, "Well, maybe that's a good thing... a little peace and quiet?" "Yeah but today is the last day.”
  4. My girlfriend just told me that I'm pretty. Well, the whole sentence was "you're pretty fukin annoying", but I like to focus on the positive
  5. I've been teaching my dog to beg. It's going well, and today he came home with 35 pounds and 50 pence!
  6. I was born a boy. Now I'm a man. However, according to Tesco's sticky toffee pudding label, I am a family of 4.
  7. These constant extentions to the Coronavirus restrictions are really starting to get on my nerves! I think we are all a bit fed up with it now! Just give us a wee bit of light at the end of this tunnel, that we might be able to go out for a pint or a meal sometime in the not too distant!
  8. I saw an old guy with a fishing rod outside my local pub, sitting fishing in a puddle. He looked so cold! So I said to him to come in to warm up a bit and I'd buy him a drink. As we sipped our double whiskeys, I thought I'd just humour him a bit. So i asked "How many have you caught today then?" He replied, "Well, your the 8th one, so far!".
  9. Whoa!!! I think you've forgot about wee Alfie Morelos there!
  10. Nice of you to say that bennett! Yes, celtic won today, but this current side is not as good as Rodgers invincibles team were back in 2016/17.
  11. I saw some guy wearing a t-shirt today that had the following print on it. I don't have any need for Google.... as my wife knows fukin EVERYTHING! 😄
  12. A busty blonde girl had heard that milk baths would make her really beautiful. So She ordered 60 pints of milk to be delivered. When the delivery man read the order he felt there must be a mistake. He thought she probably meant 6 pints, so knocked on her door to clarify the point. The blonde girl answered the door and the guy asked her "Did you really mean 60 pints or was it 6 pints? The girl said: I want 60 pints. I'm going to fill my bath up with milk and take a milk bath. "Pasteurized?" he asks She replies: "No. Just up to my tits. Then I can splash it all over my face!
  13. I just caught your comment here out the corner of my eye, while looking at the front page of P&B, and thought it said "When Edouard came to live in Scotland he was told there'd be No 10 in a row!"
  14. Cash has been terrific for Villa. Pepe hasn’t been able to get any change out of him all game.
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