Thatsvulgar

I know Spank has previously written a short piece of poetry about John as well as an erotic novel. Watch this space!

So his old school reports say! Little did those teachers know that he would go on to become a very successful and passionate junior football manager

I've spoken with Spank and he is still happy with me to post some of his drawings. In his own words "Managers come and go but art will always remain". Just to let you know, he has also written a bit of poetry about his time at Girvan

Anybody know who has taken the reins at Airdrie?

Of course not but Spank eats his porridge! He turns up with a full belly when most mangers wouldn't! They'd claim they didn't have access to fresh oats and say they were starving!

Do you think a manager has ever tried their worst?

What's the background to playing whiskey in the jar? Sounds like there's a right funny story behind it maybe?

I'd like to point out I was making a joke about the way country songs tend to follow a pattern of tragic events and in no way referring to the private life of DL. I'm kind of freaking out about the whole legal advice thing that got mentioned! I know a guy who slagged off hit comedian Andy Cameron on Twitter for having a sub-standard face and ended up doing 7 month in Polmont!

Actually got the makings of a decent country song there with those lyrics! Fire in a drink problem and a deid spouse and it's ivor novello time for DL!

Clown feet?

No way do Darvel players work? Why? That's pure greed! What's the point? Surely they veer into the supertax bracket if they work as well as those famous wages?? I just can't get my head round it. There's players who are rumoured to be on a triple pony and donkey a week but still choose to work?? I'm not buying that. Something ain't right!!

Literally just as I posted that Murdock and Face appear online!!!

I think I've missed something here?? Was it my Budget Mr T comment that has caused this? If so, I apologise. It was Saturday night and I had a wee drink in me. P.S I also made up the part about him being afraid of flying.

That's the one! He wears a lot of jewellery too! He's like a budget Mr T. The more I think of it he actually has a fair bit in common with him!! He's loud, aggressive, nothing without his backup men and believe it or not he is also afraid of flying!

Couldn't have put it better myself. I was reading his comment and couldn't quite work out what you had done wrong? I'm heading to the Kelty forum immediately.

*you're

Was that a question?

Oh the irony!

Has anybody read this report in the Record yet? Some interesting comments made. I don't know how much to read it into them though!!

Wee sacs! Deary me!!! Hahahaha! In one single week you have came out with so many horrific pieces of 90s patter. It's actually astounding! You must be doing it on purpose now? Surely?

I Genuinely think The Roxy was being quite nice there. Absolutely no need for the fruity language. 'Dig deep and see if you can find a pair?' See, it's chat like that that makes you appear uncouth and predominantly 90s patter based. You should probably be showing The Roxy a bit of respect for using the word carnaptius on a junior football forum. Aggression can be a good thing IF it's controlled. In your case, I think you struggle with it! I commented that 'Time will tell' whether or not Darvel would be promoted and you proceeded to send me a match report as well as a never ending fountain of bad language. That's not the behaviour of a man who shares a nickname with Sammy Cox! That's the behaviour of a man who is far too easy to wind up.

Still not calmed down then Darvel Keegan? Loving you bringing back all the old 90s phrases though. 'Giving it large' was good but you have really upped your game with 'jog on'. I'm half expecting you in your next post to use the words cowabunga and rad! I will love it if we beat them. Love it!!!