Doctor Manhattan

Aye, that would be my guess, especially given he's moving halfway across the world. I mean, imagine we gave him a 2 year deal and he turned out to be complete Danzaki-style bobbins. Nuclear level heads gone would ensue.

Miller does this thing where he passes the ball to another Motherwell player. It's pretty cool. He should put on a seminar for the rest of the team.

Oh, I wouldn't put much faith in anything the BBC say...

Either that, or Sturm Graz have signed him up. Injured it is, then.

OK, I know he's not Austrian, but close enough surely?

Is this rancid old witch not dead yet? (Jones, that is, not the fragrant "Catherine".)

Traumatised by the continual stream of bad news on the Motherwell thread I was reading back through this one and came across the "Grail Watches" discussion. This one in particular caught my eye because by happy coincidence I'd just been looking at a video featuring the A. Lange & Söhne 1815 Tourbillon, which makes me go all wobbly in a very good way. I've added that video here, not just because of that watch but also because it is perhaps the most dryly funny watch review video I've ever seen, with a few actual laugh-out-loud moments. Sadly, even if I won the lottery I'd be afraid to actually wear that beauty. However, there are some nice looking tourbillons in the extensive Sugesss range...

This'll never work - the "Toby" jersey is currently already filled.

I can't be 100% sure many decades after the fact, but I don't think I ever so much as took a piss in the school lavvies in all my years at the high school. In fact, I couldn't tell you where the toilets even were.

Ha, he's a year younger than me then, and if I can do it anybody can do it! For a novice like me it's time-consuming and fiddly, and you've got to be pretty careful when the movement's exposed, but it's not really that hard as I'm sure the regulars on this thread can vouch. FWIW, it took me about 5 hours to build, although a fair bit of that was watching the instruction videos. Then after I'd finished it the second hand started sticking when all three hands were aligned so I had to disassemble it and redo them. (It was much quicker/easier the second time.) The one thing I definitely WON'T be doing is taking it underwater. It has a gasket and a screw-down crown, but I wouldn't trust anything I'd built myself in the bath, let alone in the Red Sea. Purely decorative!

Unless I've missed something, Halliday hasn't actually signed? If and when it actually happens, I'll get my panties wet/in a bunch then.

The kids clubbed together and bought me a dive watch kit for Xmas, which I finally got around to tackling yesterday. The watch itself is reasonably decent quality with a a Seiko NH35 movement. The face is British Racing Green, and they chose a steel bracelet with a glidelock clasp. I'm sure it cost them a lot more than the sum of its parts, but I guess you're paying for the experience and support as much as for the parts. Movement, face, hands, case and bracelet all came separately and needed cobbling together, and I was a bit apprehensive as I'd never done anything more complicated than replacing a battery or a strap before. My eyesight isn't what it once was, and my hands aren't as steady, but it it was surprisingly enjoyable nonetheless. (f**k me, though, those hands were fiddly!) The instruction booklet was spot on, and there are a series of videos to follow online as well, and it came with every tool needed and a few more besides. I'm wearing it now as I type, and feeling remarkably smug and unjustifiably pleased with myself. The kids are definitely in the good books this year.

We had one of them, and he was a complete c**t. Granted, it's not a statistically significant sample, but I think we can reasonably hypothesise on this basis that everybody who does it is also a c**t.

So, if we'd knocked it up in-house for a fiver it would be shit, but because we spunked £25k on it (amount made up for dramatic effect) it's somehow a work of genius? Fucking creatives! And the first rude sketch that the world had seen was joy to his mighty heart, Till the Devil whispered behind the leaves, “It’s pretty, but is it Art?” - Rudyard Kipling

Bollocks to Chris Hemsworth, surely Robert Downey Jr was there for the taking. The clip at the end should have been Steelman saying something like "Iron, eh? Fancy an upgrade?"

Excerpt from Jim McMahon's email: We have worked with Scotland’s leading advertising agency to produce this 90-second video, featuring players and fans, which we hope strikes the right balance of authenticity, quirkiness and humour. It’s most definitely tongue in cheek. To give us the best chance of success, we need to get this viewed as widely as possible. We will use a number of different channels to do this but can I also ask that you share this with as many of your friends and contacts as you can Got no friends left now, Jim, sorry.

Suddenly administration, insolvency, then liquidation doesn't seem such a bad alternative.

I'm getting strong "Will hang out by the docks offering blow jobs to passing sailors" vibes from that video.

Unless that "etc" includes a big, hairy spunking willy, The Thread must stay open.

That chin! The top 3/4 of his face looks perfectly normal, but then it's as if he's unhinged his jaw like an anaconda to swallow a coypu whole.

Spookily, I was re-reading one of the early "Bosch" books last night, which explained that frequent licking of the lips is a sign that customs teams use to pick out possible mules who are smuggling drugs packed into condoms which they've swallowed and/or inserted. It's a side effect of the large quantity of anti-diarrhetic drugs they take to ensure they don't make an early exit. I'm sure this is just a coincidence.

They can't even fall back on that traditional refuge of the thick, graphic design. Even Father Dougal could knock up a better looking sign.