Doctor Manhattan

Alexander left partly due to 'toxicity' from fans - Liam Kelly Good.

I get what people are saying about how binning Alexander might be too little too late, and it might not make any difference, but even if that's true there would still be one massive benefit - it would make ME feel better, tonight at least.. Revenge, like pakora, is a dish best served hot.

I would never be so rude as to call him a clown. This c**t can only aspire to reach those dizzy heights.

I might book up for a long weekend anyway (in Prague rather than Stavanger) as it would be a more enjoyable jaunt without any of that eye-bleeding fitba pish to spoil it.

Q. Which game is McFadden describing here? A. It's tonight's, but if you answered any other game this year, give yourself a bonus point. I almost wouldn't mind getting dumped out of Europe by a bunch of Irish jobbers if we'd been even a bit unlucky, but we been so absolutely fucking woeful in every single aspect of our game for so fucking long now that I'm seriously considering giving the whole thing up.

Okay, who leaked the business plan?

Remember, we lost a home leg to fucking Llanelli once, but went through after the second leg. (AKA "doing a Lincoln Red Imps".) I'd be lying if I said I had any confidence in us turning this one round, though.

Did somebody say the other day that they hoped Mugabi DIDN'T get sent off in the first minute again? Pros and cons, eh?

Yep, I mean, they're OK and all, just nothing special - even in Dublin, with a Guinness chaser. I have a soft spot for these bubbled beauties, although I've never tried them in a roll. I don't know what they put in the flavouring, but you can still smell them on your fingers several days later, no matter how often you wash your hands. I'm not sure whether that's a good sign or a bad sign.

We are definitely winning the fucking league this year!

The sight of a Celtic or Rangers top in an airport provides an early visual warning to stay clear and avoid the olfactory assault. The smell itself is so that blind people can hate them too.

You don't need to pay road tax if you ride on the pavement.

Ever the cheery c**t. Crewe Alexandra Twitter

Limited run or not, that kit is one of the few things I've seen that makes me envy Helen Keller. (Joss Whedon's "Justice League" was another, along with pretty much all of Motherwell's performances in 2022 to date.)

A little bit of sick just came up in my mouth. And by "a little bit", I mean "quite a big bit".

I thought you'd finally come up with a scenario that even Rule 34 didn't cater for, but that blow-up doll tells a different story.

Aye, it did cross my aging mind that it might just be weans who don't know any better, despite either sitting in or having sight of the POD - but it's probably roasters.

I mean, we all know that Twitter has its share of fucking roasters, but even so...

When you see it all laid out like that it's more like some insane Jeux sans frontières comeback.

I get the worrying feeling that that might be HIS cum face!

Are the half-and-half scarves available yet?

A small part of me has a sneaking admiration for anybody that keen to follow Motherwell, but the rest of me thinks, "What a bunch of total wallopers."

You'd think a woman commenting on gender equality would be cut some slack but, as J K Rowling found out, the ability to menstruate counts for very little on social media these days. If anything, it's an actual disadvantage.