NorthernJambo

Happy 40th Card. The doctor will be taking an unhealthy interest in your arse soon.

You shut yer puss, arsehile. Even if I did know where teuchtar station was I wouldn’t tell you. Anyway, this morning I booked train tickets for my next trip to Fife in a few weeks - still don’t have the refund (or response to my email) from the tickets I was charged twice a couple of weeks ago. Looking forward to the cans on the train though.

“LEAVE ALL YOUR STUFF”. f**k off, Brian...

Similarly, in Fife bus drivers give (or gave, not been on a bus in Fife for about a decade) change but Aberdeen buses don’t (contactless will bankrupt the c***s hopefully). Anyway, first time after I’d moved I got the bus and gave the driver a five note. Boy went off his nut shouting that I should know it’s not in to him to carry change. How would I know this mate, I’ve just moved here. He apologised and had change on him anyway? Weird types, bus drivers.

8/10. Think I knew 4, couple of educated guesses, couple of lucky guesses. That’ll do pig, that’ll do.

Joe Joyce v Ian Lewison is on Dave on Friday night. Think the winner becomes mandatory [emoji57]. Joking aside, interesting debut. If Lewison is fit it’s a very tough debut for Joyce. Big ‘if’ though.

Certainly not ideal!

Particularly feel for the bairns in this scenario. Bad enough the turmoil of the break up now their dads in a bad way too. They old enough to understand or just kids?

It’s long, doesn’t rhyme and doesn’t mention bees...not sure you’ve got the hang of this. Nah, it’s good! You’ve a knack for painting a picture with words.

I completely agree with this. FWIW, I’d rather see Joshua v Takam than Joshua v Whyte 2 just now. It’s slim pickings though and honestly, who deserves a shot most? f**k knows.

Could always share them on here for us to take the piss. Sorry, for us to tell you how good they are...

Is it just fair to say that AJ, same as Klitschko’s didn’t, doesn’t really have great fighters fight against? Maybe that’s a good thing as he’s obviously less likely to lose but maybe it’s bad as he’s less likely to have a career that we’ll be able to look back and think he really was one of the best... Basically, this isn’t a new problem for the HW division

Supermik alias found

I hope your mother makes a full and speedy recovery! All the best.

And subsequently we can put the world to rights. You’re in.

Fucking starving now as well.

It should be and, shouldn’t it? Fucking hell, this is confusing. Just said it aloud and and is the only one that seems right. The roll is neither in nor on the sausage. The sausage could be considered in and/or on the roll though.

Indeed, hence our official recommendation. It’s a bylaw that if the filling comes first on or in must be used. Nobody wants to receive a sausage roll when they were after a roll n sausage. I can’t wait to kick f**k out a cafe now.

Motions stands. ‘N’ rather than either of them. If the filling comes first either in or on can be used but we advise put the “roll ‘n’ filling”. It’s tricky being in charge but this is an example of how we’ll listen, evolve and make sure we make this world a better place for all of us. Thanks for your help.

So far it’s cafes using on rather than in, anyone buying or selling mushroom suppers, people bad mouthing tennents and white male studenty types with dreadlocks that are on the hit list for the P&B Task Force. I can see why KarlMarx is a mentalist. I’m already getting giddy with just the thought of the power and it’s been an hour. He’s been pretending (I assume) to be in the police for years.

Too long and started thinking maybe something bad happened to Salman. I’ve let Simon know he has the wrong number.

How did you find out all this stuff about me?! Do you want to join mine and Shandon’s force? Could use a guy like you.

Right, on a serious/genuine note I just received a text saying the following; “Hi Rob, just a quick Traffic Cops update. The final run of this Year's series begins next Monday (23rd) 8pm Channel 5. Next week's show includes the abandoned 4x4 story and Salman Din's accident. Salman is blurred out, but if you wouldn't mind informing him and his family, that would be really helpful. Fyi I can also send you downloads to all your episodes if you want me to. Hope you are well, best, Simon.” Unfortunately the photo thing still wasn’t working last I checked so I can’t send a screenshot but it’s real. How I do reply? Edit: tried uploading a photo, still not working [emoji35]

It’s one of the problems with our society, consider it included!

I don’t mean to speak ill of the dead but I bloody knew there was something about him!