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Everything posted by coprolite

  1. Nobody goes into journalism because they like effort. After "artist" it is the job that most lazy b*****ds think will be a doddle.
  2. A goalscorer is a very rare commodity. I think our last proper finisher was Stavrum. Trying to find one at our level is quite tricky. Trying to find someone who can regularly get 20 a season and play a bit is even trickier. I'm sure it's occurred to management that such a player would be a good thing. Trying to find, sign and pay that player is a bit harder. If there is anywhere on the park that all round ability is inessential, it's up front.
  3. Croatia v England - semi final

    Historically, it was Jews and Gays.
  4. Croatia v England - semi final

    I am really looking forward to work today, in England. I hope the wall chart's up to date. hahahahahaha! hahahaha! (thank f**k)
  5. Rangers latest statement is a bit of a let down tbh. A reminder of previous high standards: https://rangers.co.uk/news/headlines/scottish-cup-tie-statement/ https://rangers.co.uk/news/headlines/club-statement-60/ https://rangers.co.uk/news/headlines/club-statement-83/
  6. The Celtic 2018/19 thread

    Ok, thanks. I take back the jibe about poor comprehension skills. This article does explain why he has raised the issue now though: “when asked”.
  7. The Celtic 2018/19 thread

    he is a don, after all.
  8. The Celtic 2018/19 thread

    Not sure i get this. I mean: i got it in context in the film but it seems irrelevant here. unless the joke is that Logan is black too, like the sherriff? in which case, i think you proved brendan wrong.
  9. The Celtic 2018/19 thread

    Has Logan actually said that he was racially abused on the last day of last season or are the greatest fans in the world battering the f**k out of a straw man due to their poor comprehension skills?
  10. The Hibernian Thread

    All good players. no idea what your fans thought of them. You rated fergie so highly you sacked him. My hypothesis wasn't admittedly very well developed. I just wanted to be gratuitously insulting to your fans. The big fannies.
  11. Lock Ibrox from the outside on an OF derby day then fill it with water and piranhas. If we miss any they should be flayed and their heads placed on a pike in the town square. Then we move on to the Celtics.
  12. Our history of selling Uk sourced players isn’t fantastic either. Maybe we’re a bit shit at that bit of our asset management? Agree we can’t realistically cover all of Europe, or elsewhere, but some focused scouting in well chosen locations should be feasible and could pay for itself if we get good at the other bits too.
  13. The Hibernian Thread

    I wouldn't get too excited on the say so of St Mirren fans. I'm still bitter about being duped by friends who assured me that Ricky Gilles would be a cracking signing for the dons. They have low expectations and low standards, even compared with hibs.
  14. Work colleagues

    Some moany faced p***ks at my work have got together and formulated a “workplace etiquette” document which is being rolled out. This includes prohibition on eating lunch at your desk, talking about anything other than work, mobile ringtones and probably smiling. Fortunately there is no restriction on gbh.
  15. Unpopular opinions.

    Was he not also the old minister guy who had the gym. Or was that in the bill.
  16. i hope this is insider knowledge about Tansey.
  17. England v Colombia

    They created a couple of chances from open play.
  18. England v Colombia

    I work in (middle) England, with a load of (middle) English people. I wanted to see them humbled and crying. Now they are going to be unbearably smug about overcoming Colombia's cheating with good old fashioned fair play. I am going to have to spend all day explaining that they didn't create a chance from open play and did more play acting and diving than Colombia. They will not accept this. Maybe one or two actual football fans will. The majority are premiership/ champions league "fans" who buy into the hype. Colombia were horrible c***s and did plenty whingeing and pulling, but there are no Colombians at my work. I would like to give Hoddle extra credit for myopia in commentary when one of Englands second-row shoved a colombian blatantly and right in front of the ref. "he must have been pushed first and he's reacted".
  19. How does plastic get in the ocean?

    Don't want to sound like a dick but he did jest and it made me laugh, you sir did not, so please leave failed
  20. How does plastic get in the ocean?

    You jest but high levels of Dihydrogen Monoxide are often associated with large bodies of water. Large doses of this chemical have previously been linked to mass fatalities. It is found in the bodies of victims of anthrax poisoning and in the lungs of people killed by mustard gas. This is the real danger.
  21. Things That Don't Particularly Make Sense

    Surely only cold water freezes? Unless we’ve introduced another variable like changing pressure, the freezing point of water is about 0 degrees. Water that is just above that will freeze almost instantly when cooled. Water that is at say 90 degrees will take some time to cool to immediately above zero degrees. I call bullshit. Mpemba and Aristotle are having a laugh with this one.
  22. Petty Things That Get On Your Nerves...

    is there a button that rotates whole documents? admin seem to struggle with scanning things the right way up (amongst many other things) and manually rotating 100 plus pages gets irritating. I have tried a hardware based fix but my screen only rotates ~150°.