Jimmy Shaker

No point looking on the BBC website for the Scottish Cup scores. There's information presented but it's so wrong as to be a complete waste of time.

Their support hasn't realised this yet. Gonna be interesting when they do.

My cat Suzie. She's 14 next month and came to us from the Cats Protection League. We should have taken another one to keep her company as I think she's a bit bored during the day. Wouldn't advise getting a kitten unless you've all day every day to play with it and train it. Suzie came to us fully ready to eat, sleep and shite in the right places (most of the time), to hell with going through that with a kitten.

Zoolander 2 What an atrocity of a film. Penelope Cruz just about makes going worthwhile but holy shit, that's a bad film.

Well, you did.

Except that they aren't.

No they're not.

How can Caley keep growing when they were killed off?

The Imitation Game Benedict Cumberbatch plays Alan Turing in what could be known as 'Sheldon Cooper - The Movie', at least the first half anyway. Yet again Hollywood forgoes the hard work of making something up and instead goes for an adaptation of an interesting person/situation and does a hell of a job of making a movie about a hutful of geniuses sitting about breaking codes during the Second World War II. Both Cumberbatch and the young lad hired to play Turing in his school days give their roles their all, while Charles Dance does a stellar job as the Navy suit desperate to fire Turing and his associates and Keira Knightly overdoes her frightfully posh accent. The scenes of cheery youngsters having a good time at Turing's engagement party, when all other evidence suggests the days were as bleak for codebreakers as they were for everyone else in the war, seemed a bit out of place but did little to distract from the film as a whole. The Yanks will hate it as they get no credit for anything throughout the film, but I've not seen much, if anything, better at the cinema this year.

Todays Fake Polling Day ballot is running at 61-39 in favour of Yes.

Always a major player in the public opinion market, the Fitba North polls went as follows... With 41 days to go, the poll looked like this... YES - independence from the Union 56% [32] NO - remain as part of the Union 44% [25] With a month to go, it looked like this... YES - independence from the Union 68% [15] NO - remain as part of the Union 32% [7] On the morning of the first day of the month in which the election takes places, it looked like this... YES - independence from the Union 57% [13] NO - remain as part of the Union 43% [10] With one week to go, it looked like this... YES - independence from the Union 66% [23] NO - remain as part of the Union 34% [12]

I believe it'll make some kind of difference. Not sure how much but I actually think it will. Whether that means we're not taking this seriously enough, or take football too seriously, is for someone else to decide. In other poll news, every time I've opened up a discussion with the 17-19 year olds who pass through my classroom, 'No' comes out on top, although mainly because there's only ever a mix of 'No' and 'TOWIE', and TOWIE ain't on the ballot paper.

I don't know about Aberdeen. There's a shortage of flags, badges, etc. on the go in town itself, but the occasional splash of graffiti promoting 'Yes'. I've seen little in the way of campaigning on the streets except for a small 'No' stall which stood shivering in the rain last weekend while all their materials were soaked and ruined. Tubes. Were one to judge the vote on presence of Yes/No imagery hiding inamongst the monied dwellers of Kingswells, Yes would take the area, but it's hard to say how the Yanks and English kicking about would vote. I get the feeling there's an apathy in the city that's not present elsewhere. Meetings, marches, gatherings, etc., all seem to be on a smaller scale or less publicised than elsewhere. A solid effort this month could swing it, but after two years of horseshit from politicians, I have a feeling the result v Germany the week before the vote will make more difference than any last minute campaigning in some places up here. In the Shire things are a bit more 'No', with more flags and badges promoting the negative seen at The Turriff Show last weekend, although the Better Together and Yes Scotland stalls were perched next to each other and the latter was making may more effort to approach punters while the BT lot stood idle trying to hand out Union Flags to loaded farmers who are already committed unionists. Along the coast, Yes seems to be more prominent, but we're a shy type in the north-east and not known for actively taking an interest in anything bar moonshine and cousins. The Yestival evening in Lossiemouth drew a big crowd despite being forced to change venue at the last minute when the original venue refused to open their doors to them or even answer the phone, while the No campaign in town is run exclusively by Tories and thus is having a hard time. Burghead is full of Rangers fans who have defaulted to the expected position of having spent the entire week shouting 'What's Plan B?' out of their windows at passing cars. It's all quite quiet. I think folk (myself included) have stopped involving themselves in the debate as much as possible and just want it done. Perhaps that was the plan all along for some.

The company which makes (or originally made) Toblerone is called Tobler, and the mountain shaped chocolate have the name Toblerone because they were the first thing the company ever produced. Hence the name, which is very often pronounced incorrectly, ToblerONE. The product was so successful they didn't bother making anything else, avoiding the silly idea of having a product called Toblertwo.

What are you talking about? These guys have all been die hard Brora fans for years. They just happened to be working every weekend since about forever. I posted three photos of Brora players taken in the past few seasons on Fitba North and none of the support knew who they were.

Agrees with everything I said then says I don't know what I'm talking about. What a balloon.

Grant Street ain't too far from the main streets in Inverness so you can get a pint there and walk out to the ground. The nearest pub to the ground is the Nip Inn, a well #dece boozer that's only a hundred yards or so from the pitch. As for this forum, that's explained in another thread.

I'm confused.

When has anyone ever stood in my place at Clachs ground? Why would I even have a place at Clachs ground?

Why are all the people involved with Strathspey Thistle so angry all the time.

'Decimated'. Aye, ok.

How'd that pumping go? Or were you one of the many Clach fans who'd a court appearance yesterday and couldn't make it?

Behind The Candelabra. Two hours of bling bling as the miserably extravagant story of Liberace is told to camera. A comedy with apparent tragic undertones, but the latter are rendered meaningless as the lifestyle of the two leads is so overblown. Features Michael Douglas in the lead role, in what must be his best outing in years, while Matt Damon sighs about in his company while occasionally hanging out the back of him. Dan Ackroyd does a fine (if brief) turn as Liberace's exasperated manager, but the show was stolen by Rob Lowe who put in a spectacularly sleazy take on the pianists plastic surgeon. The budget for this was $23 million. There are individual scenes that look so gaudy they must have cost a quarter of that. Such is the quality of make up and prosthetic hooters etc. in use in the production it's difficult to pinpoint the exact moment at which Matt Damon turns into a fat Gordon Ramsay, but he does, reverting to his own appearance only for the closing scenes, while the scene where Douglas is seen without wig makes you appreciate the effort the hairpiece squad were making. 4/5, with a full mark just for Rob Lowe.

Haven't watched this in ages. Every time I do I remember why I don't. 6 folk on the panel is one too many, especially if you're going to have terrific thundercunts like Galloway on board. Will give it a look tonight to see if there's fireworks in the first 15 but chances are Family Guy and American Dad will be on by the third subject.