Jimmy Shaker

They’ve had one for at least two seasons. Some droll canary yellow thing.

Well, you’ll be here a while so we’ll see you again soon.

Last team to lose, game number, who they lost to, who won the league 2023/24 - Brechin City / 13 / Fraserburgh / TBC 2022/23 - Brechin City / 24 / Formartine United / Brechin City^ 2021/22 - Fraserburgh / 14 / Rothes / Fraserburgh 2019/20 - Fraserburgh / 12 / Inverurie Loco Works / Brora Rangers+ 2018/19 - Cove Rangers / 17 / Fraserburgh / Cove Rangers 2017/18 - Cove Rangers / 32 / Forres Mechanics / Cove Rangers* 2016/17 - Buckie Thistle / 16 / Keith / Buckie Thistle** 2015/16 - Cove Rangers / 19 / Brora Rangers / Cove Rangers 2014/15 - Brora Rangers / Completed the season unbeaten / Brora Rangers 2013/14 - Brora Rangers / 15 / Fraserburgh / Brora Rangers^ ^ - only league defeat that season; + - season abandoned due to Covid; * - lost after the title had been won; ** - well, kind of. Still looking good for Brechin on the pitch, if not financially.

We’re all talking about Brechin losing, but Brechin fans seem strangely absent this weekend.

Dunno what it’s like for you lot locally, but counting is taught in schools across the country, Brechiners.

I dunno about this show now. Channel 4 have done something to it which isn’t agreeing with me. It’s almost certainly the fault of the producers for running out of tasks, but the casts are just not made up of funny people any more, with far too much emphasis on getting a good spread of people sat in the seats. There’s too much acting and performing going on and it’s all a bit polished. The COVID-affected seasons excluded for obvious reasons, the last couple just haven’t worked for me. The one just finished was entirely the fault of Lucy Beaumont. Imagine being the weird one in a marriage which involves Jon Richardson. That accent. Sam Campbell’s ‘child of divorce’ line was the highlight, probably It’s fine that no-one’s come on and been as wide as Iain Stirling, but at least his stupidity was memorable. I don’t think I’ll remember anything about the last season come the turn of the year.

Oh f**k.

Clubs tend not to report attendances and haven’t for some time. Brechin being the recent exception, and even theirs have had doubt cast upon them.

Will he be required to put his own money into the club and then spend the rest of his time clawing it back one way or another?

Not sure why he’d know a thing about the SHFL because he was at Elgin. The club has only rarely been interested in players from the SHFL in as long as I can remember.

I had hoped to have gone through the papers to get all this by now but well.. babies. I got as far back as 1978/79 and hope to restart proceedings soon.

The 1897/98 season table I have is missing five games in total. Only the top two (champions Clach and runners up Caledonian) player all 16 games.

Indeed.

Oh mate.

Brechin potentially two games away from overtaking Strathspey in the 2009-2023 league table.

The cup used to be played early doors back in the day - group stages and everything - with the regional trophies played on Saturdays in spring. There’s plenty time for games, providing certain clubs keep an eye on their pitches. Being shot of those clowns from Fort and Cove means we’re in a better place.

Games at Brora, Buckie, and Rothes are off. Everything else is still on, for now. Raised eyebrows at the fact Locos and Huntly seem so confident of action this afternoon.

Clach beat Vale 2-0 at GSP the season they won the league.

I can’t remember if herself watched Big Brother when it was on TV previously. Based on the spectacular array of shite she watches currently, I am guessing… probably. Sakes.

Clach have been skint forever. It's part of their character. The last time they topped the table was the final day of the 2003/04 title winning season - Saturday, May 15th, 2004. Of the clubs in the league just now, that's the second-longest run without topping the table at any point in the years since, with only Strathspey Thistle - who have never been top - going longer.

The only shocker there was the fact Lossie let them away with a point, despite the best efforts of the Kincorth referee nominally in charge of proceedings.

Really? Thirteen days? Anyway. There's a tape measure on the floor of the bathroom. Just lying in the middle of the floor. I know it doesn't live in that room, or even belong in there. There's no logical reason for it being in the vicinity. I also know I didn't drop it. It has been there since Sunday evening. I dunno if this is laziness on her part, as she's walked around it about two dozen times since dropping it there, or if this is some kind of art installation, or what. Will keep you up to date on how long it stays there because I'm not picking it up. Also - used teabags have been found this week in the following locations... - in the ceramic resting spoon used for ladels, big spoons, etc; - in an otherwise clean cereal bowl hauled off the draining rack next to the sink; - in a pan; - on a slice of loaf; - on an empty crisp packet; - on top of another tea bag on the worktop. Literally everywhere but the fucking bin.

And yet there you are, hammering out a response again. Imma needing a bigger boat!

He rinses a response out of you lot almost every time, so I'd say he's doing a bang up job.

Made an arse of this, haven’t you. Vale will almost certainly get telt.