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About BFTD

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    Jazz Fiend

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    Alloa Athletic
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  1. Do resignations count? What about being offered a job at The Ran...err, another club?
  2. Bear in mind they were seriously accused of creating a sex simulator with full homosexual penetration back in 2007, all because there's a brief glimpse of blue alien arse. America, lol. The Witcher games were censored over there too. The copious amounts of gore and blood were fine, of course, but the tits had to be taken out.
  3. Inventing Mr Whippy cancels all of that out, surely.
  4. We'll have our cake and eat it too. ...just as soon as the shops have flour and sugar back in.
  5. It sort of speaks volumes for a relationship if one of you disappears to the loo at the start of a film and the other doesn't bother their arse to see what's happened to you until the credits roll.
  6. Realistically, taking anything from our games against them would be excellent, as evidenced by them demolishing Austria 4-0 in their own back yard. But if the ancient kingdom of Macedonia can turn over Ze Germans at their own gaff, anything's possible. Let's be optimistic. If the team plays well and keeps concentration, who knows. (two heavy defeats and a draw with Moldova it is)
  7. I would happily murder anyone using a phone during a film, or refusing to shut the f**k up. I'd happily murder most people at the best of times TBH, but those c***s would get extra murdered.
  8. My worst ever toilet story comes from that Cineworld, so that doesn't surprise me.
  9. Not enough people remember the excellent old rhyme, "thirty days hath September, April, June, and November...err...all the rest have thirty-one...except for February, which has twenty-eight, except on leap years...when it has twenty-nine for fun?" Who could forget.
  10. During the occasional re-opening between lockdowns, the cinemas were actually asking people to leave their rubbish at their seats rather than taking it with them (well, Vue were, anyway). I remember it because it seemed about as useful as putting up signs reminding people to breathe out after breathing in.
  11. Maybe put them into a kennel. You've no proof that it wasn't you.
  12. Sneeze on it before it kills your family. It'd have no effect on 99.99% of the human population. Your body apparently seeks out interesting new ways to hurt itself.
  13. Just bought the wean one of these as a joke, as he had one years ago and thought it was hi-larious. Farting - heh. Noticed on the back that something appeared to have been covered with a sticker...what could it be?
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