SEETHING

BINVERNESS WALLYDONIAN WHISTLE 1 - 1 CHAMPIONS Like me, FOLLOWERS, you have no doubt been BAMBOOZLED and CONFUDDLED at the very occasional performance from the Champions that does not amount to a STEAMROLLERING of the opposition. Well, I have CRACKED the mystery. Your 2020-21 Champions have been indulging in PERFORMANCE ART. "HARK", they say, "QUIVER in terror at our GARGANTUAN lead at the top of this MEAGRE LEAGRE, despite employing a NINCOMPOOP manager and deliberately playing terribly very occasionally!" The message could not be clearer, FOLLOWERS. The CAPITAL CONQUERORS are demonstrating their obvious superiority by CAKEWALKING their way to the title with one hand tied behind their collective back. Quite MAGNIFICENT and POWERFULLY EROTIC, I'm sure you will agree. When the Champions decide to call a LONG OVERDUE INTERLUDE to said performance art, I will put EQUIVALENT EFFORT into my corresponding match report.

Tbf Dundee and its citizens/service users exude the air of rampant drug misuse, so there may be something to that characterisation too.

Yeah sorry; I'm an Edinburgher so the silent red dot is a characteristically passive-aggressive way of marking my disapproval of your awful opinion viz Leith.

Glaswegian "friendliness" is a thin veil that barely conceals the constant internal strife to be The Most Gallus. A sickening affliction.

CHAMPIONS 1 - 1 GREENOCK MARTIN Like me, FOLLOWERS, you have no doubt been BAMBOOZLED and CONFUDDLED at the very occasional performance from the Champions that does not amount to a STEAMROLLERING of the opposition. Well, I have CRACKED the mystery. Your 2020-21 Champions have been indulging in PERFORMANCE ART. "HARK", they say, "QUIVER in terror at our GARGANTUAN lead at the top of this MEAGRE LEAGRE, despite employing a NINCOMPOOP manager and deliberately playing terribly very occasionally!" The message could not be clearer, FOLLOWERS. The CAPITAL CONQUERORS are demonstrating their obvious superiority by CAKEWALKING their way to the title with one hand tied behind their collective back. Quite MAGNIFICENT and POWERFULLY EROTIC, I'm sure you will agree. I trust that Greenock Martin will enjoy his souvenir point from the home of the Champions; a well-deserved reward for parking his JALOPY in the Tynecastle goalmouth like he was playing Hearts circa 2014. The juggernaut rolls ever onwards.

Three Hearts LEGENDS in that picture (and Craig Gordon).

Josh Ginnelly - our only competent winger despite having signed five of late - gubbed his hamstring (ending his season) a couple of weeks ago.

Ah yes, the natural position of one's left leg when running.

Queen of the South 1 - 1 Champions Despite Robbie Neilson's Sub-Par Management This is the key shot. Jones' leg going back and to his left, deliberately manoeuvred from the front and right. Totally inconsistent with a foul from Stephen Kingsley. Again, back and to the left. Back and to the left. Back and to the left. Back and to the left. FOLLOWERS, I am a patient man (how else could I ENDURE your INANE posts?) but this CONSPIRACY against the EDINBURGH EXCELSIOR is really getting beyond a joke. The CHAMPIONS were trapped deep within DIVEY JONES' LOCKER tonight, clearly unable to string two passes together as a result of the BLATANT INJUSTICE meted out by a whistler acting on instruction from SFA ONANISM ONANISM ONANISM HEADQUARTERS. Not even PHIL COLLINS could imagine the sort of odds that were against the CHAMPIONS. Regardless, after a late, HEROIC HEIST, a DELICIOUS point was secured; another step towards INEVITABLE TITLE GLORY.

"How would you sum up Hearts' performance?" "Rubbish."

Don't think any of your posts had an impact on the result mate.

What did I tell you, readers. What did I tell you.

Would still back Hearts (-1) at this point tbqhwy.

With Robert Neilson at the helm you might be right. Tbf I quite enjoy our brief flirtations with the silly league.