Addie

No 30 Sgt Wilson 'Sergeant Wilson - How many good threads does this guy have to kill with shite jokes before the mods take action? Is a bad influence on Mozzamozza who seems to see himself as protege of sorts.' Billy Dynamite 'Wilson was born in 1887, and is carefree, cheerful and well-spoken, although more complex than he first seems. He has a vague and dreamy personality and an aura of mystery.' Wikipedia Sgt Wilson joined the Pie and Bovril Army in 2005 and has served in several Tours of Duty including any thread that involves a tragedy and of course the Depression thread. Here are some of his highlights on there. And his sparring partner on here... I doubt Sgt Wilson needs a slow cooker recipe.

No 31 Jagfox 'Jagfox - Posting style consisting entirely of shit memes and crap jokes. The emoticon is now the mark of the devil.' Sloop John B In at No 31 is Jagfox. A poster who has been on here since 2004. He seems to enjoy doing three things on here: 1. Posting bollocks 2. Using smillies 3. Giving me green dots. I like the c**t. 'He's the only guy I like that I have on ignore' Lex Collector '' StuartTaylor I actually like the lad, but anyone who calls fitba 'footie' deserves a place on the list.

No 32 Bobby Skidmarks Really???? Ser Bobby? Njord voted for Sir Bobby and failed to give an acceptable reason. So did a few others and I was tempted to ignore them as Bobby is amy buddy, but hey ho. The thread must go on... 'Boring' wisbit 'Wisbit - He called me boring, he lives at home with his Mum eating Dairylea lunchables in his St Mirren PJs which have an ironed crease in the trousers. He once tried to leave home but didn't trust the teenagers hanging around at the end of his street. He claims to have been in the army but he was collecting outside Marks and Spencer's for the Salvation Army when he was a boy, his Mum was with him in case he got into bother.' Sir Bobby Bobby's wrath didn't just end there though. Oh no. 'Bobby Skidmarks , gone downhill rapidly' Njord Dazzle voted for him too. Bobby was not impressed... 'Dazzle probably lives in a bedsit blowing spunkbubbles to the tune of Total Eclipse of the Heart famously perfomred by Wales' finest singer (before H from Steps) Bonnie Tyler' What can I tell you about Bobby? He lives in Auld Reekie and despite his hatred for board games, he does enjoy Trivial Pursuit at Xmas time. Should he be on the list? Should he f**k.

No 33 White Rose Killie 'Norman is a decent guy IRL (in real life, yo') who turns into a fucking disgrace as soon as he logs onto P&B. Drags the good name of Killie fans into the mud. I mean, we're all closet Rangers fans not closet Celtic fans. Pffft.' QLP White Rose Killie is fondly known as Norman to his beloved friends over on the BRALT. A thread that Norman himself admitted to being the only reason for joining Pie and Bovril in the first place.. See - who says the BRALT was a bad thing? Thanks to me and Norm, the BRALT is no longer the worst thread ever started on here. However in WRK's defence he did state this... What does WRK bring to the forum though? Bennett would be lost without him... The_Kincardine disnae like to miss out on the Normanator though... I think Norman's place is a bit harsh, but mainly due to his football team. Two things I have learned from this thread; 1. Killie fans hate each other. Truly. 2. Confirmation that wisbit is a knob. Norman works as a Data Entry Clerk for a family run hardware store in Wakefield. He is married to his wife of 40 years and they both enjoy outdoor pursuits, fine wine and necrophilia. Norman once drank a pint of his own urine as a bet, and won a packed of Wrigley's Juicy Fruit as a result. He enjoys Corrie, but not Eastenders. 'No Norman, no necrophilia' Forever_Blue

I dinnae want to give the game away, but can you pas on your signature to WeeperDee please?

No 34 and 33 The Messiah and Zen Archer. Why? The Messiah is a Junior thicko fan and Zen is a poor man's The Phoenix. Can't be arsed writing about them tbh.

No 35 Surpas / Supras or whatever the f**k he's called. Cuntometer Reading: lower than expected Reasons 'His posts on the Misc Fitba Forum were similar to the auld guy having a massive fart in the dance floor.' StuartTaylor 'The guy is a tool' Ched Evans 'I miss him so much' H_B 'He's a better poster than wisbit' Pie and Bovril Surpas sneaked into the Top 50 and would have been rated higher had he not received a ban. His comeback aliases were shittier than any on here anyhow. What can you say about this poster? Not much, other than he spent yers at the London School of Economics and failed to predict the credit crunch as he was too busy posting about Gary Neville being better than Messi.

Just wait until I announce the Top 5...

Ach f**k it. Supras is next. Grimbo...do the honours...

Good point. I think I might rattle through the list over the next day or so. I have delegated the task tonight already though.

'WISBIT - a mummy's boy, who murders plants' Deeboy

Shitting Christ.

Sol Milhoose or whatever.... Get the f**k off my thread. You don't feature until, much, much later on. You will have your moment.

'f**k it, I don't care if he doesn't post much anymore. Number 1 is The Phoenix. An abomination of a poster who seems to exist to post shite, unfunny puns. Reminds me of the cringey uncle everyone has who keeps making shite jokes around the dinner table when everyone just wishes he'd f**k off.' Gaz

'VikingTON: Brutal patter and all-round internet bellend and compulsive liar. Also talks complete and utter shite about football.' 8mileBU

'Eoin Doyle/SOL/Whatever else - P&B's answer to Milhouse.' CraigKillie In tribute to Sol, here is a fitting, and yet, shitty gif

No 39 Spain Whoa! Hauld the bus!!! Cuntometer Reading: too high Reason f**k knows. I think he's pretty sound. 'Spain - Boring b*****d who doesn't appreciate humour; as evidenced by his boring username story and his boring attempt to start a second Highland Derby thread after one had already been created as he deemed my one to contain too much patter.' Stephen Malkmus; a poster who claims: Spain is the Deputy Leader of the famous FUN Party who cruised to power on the Pie and Bovril election. Show some fuckin respect Stephen. He wasn't the only one who voted obviously, but he was one of the few who gave me reasons at least.

'The Clamidyia Kid - A new poster who claims that he spends his time lifting weights and doing protein shakes when he's actually a fat Rangers fan who lives in bedsit. He has never had sex and sits behind unsuspecting females on the bus so he can smell their shampoo. He once got ejected from the Buchanan Galleries for shitting his pants on a Tuesday afternoon.' Sir Robert Skidmarks

No 40 The OP Cuntometer Reading - 10 Known for: Scotland's answer to Harvey Specter (he has 7 years experience as a paralegal you know?) The OP makes the top 40 of this year's poll and is arguably the most regressed poster on here. He has a post count of over 5k and has amassed a rep of over 1100. Can't be that bad, but 2015 has seen a turn for the worse. 'The OP - for a long time the one good Celtic poster on here, he has in the last year descended into a constantly seething frothy mess.' Sue Perkins Quitongo's Left Peg 'The OP. Suffers from delusions of adequacy. Happy to post how much he knows about the law and never fails to play the victim card.' WillieMillersmoustache Tbf, he got that annoying p***k H_B telt on the James McLean thread though. Too little, too late though.

'Romeo - In a word, utterly boring. Which is actually 2 words.' Cardinal Richelieu

Do you want pizza? I've ordered pizza.

Iiiiiiiinnnnn First Place....... ...a close second.... ...round for another lap of glory.... ...and like a transatlantic phone call in the 80's, Zen is in with more than 15 minutes delay.

I wonder who will be the arsehole to post unedited with an 'ETA' My money is on Zen or The Phoenix.

I like Grimbo - he did a cracking job last night.