Jacksgranda

One of his minions will do it for him

4/10 for Wednesday, Wonderful 2/10 for Tuesday Phenomenal 2/10 for Monday Woeful The Wooden Spoon Committee has had a meeting...oh, wait I've already tried that one

The Wooden Spoon Committee has had a meeting and decided to not award The Spoon for the last 4 weeks, but it's back to business this week.

This has taken a lot out of my wife, too, I think she needs to recover nearly as much as I do. I was oblivious to what was going on in the initial stages whereas she knew I was very seriously ill and had all the worry and had to give permission for procedures etc as I was out of it.

I've always felt he was very over rated as an international. Not a popular view, I know.

I was 26. It was incredibly disappointing. Quite frankly I think it knocked the national psyche for 6 for years after.

I know what you mean but I only related that anectode* because it actually happened. Quite frankly when you're lying in hospital wired up to various devices you don't give a damn who's looking after you. * anecdote

True dat

I don't think things are that bad...

My wife told me the night whenever she looked at me in the ambulance she didn't think I'd be coming home.

Queen's Park, Ayr United, East Fife...

I may not have been entirely serious with the last bit...

Is it not a Simpsons reference for a handwringing, knicker wetting, pinko liberal?

Makes you very lazy

Nae snaw yet.

"Reports of my death have been greatly slightly exaggerated" Although my wife did say "You gave everyone a bit of a scare" For those of you who haven't got 45 minutes to spare, skip to the end. Thanks to all who asked after me and sent messages, special thanks to @welshbairn who wrote me a letter, much appreciated. It all started on Saturday 6th November, when we were to go for our covid booster, and I decided not to take it as I thought I was starting a cold, and I was still swithering about getting it when my wife and daughter were in getting theirs, but decided against it, which is probably just as well as the way I felt on Sunday would probably have initially been put down to the covid reaction. Sunday I had great difficulty breathing and it just got worse as the day wore on, I had absolutely no energy. My wife got concerned when I couldn't walk from the hall chair to the living room a distance of some 5 steps, she finally got me oxtered into the living room. She kept saying "Do you want me to get the doctor?", and I just sat there flapping my hands and going "No, no. no", so she realised I was going to be of no help and phoned the doctor on call and was told he would ring back in 4 hours, so she immediately phoned an ambulance. I can vaguely remember the ambulance man being in the living room, but have no recollection of my stepdaughter, a granddaughter and a neighbour who is a nurse also being there. The last thing I remember is lying in the ambulance with my wife looking in the door (stepdaughter and granddaughter were also there but all I remember is my wife) and the ambulance man talking to me "Stay with me buddy, keep talking" or words along those lines when they want you to stay conscious. The next thing I remember is coming to in a side ward of the E&A in Antrim hospital with a chest drain in and catheter in, having lost about 5 hours. My wife says the doctors were very good, ringing every couple of hours to inform her of progress. I had a collapsed lung. Then I was whipped off to a ward where I was constantly getting blood samples taken, iv drips, saline drips, blood pressure taken and hooked up to the oxygen machine, I was pretty ropy for a couple of days. However, things began to improve and after over a week I started to eat, I put the loss of appetite down to the medication, saline drips and stress. X-rays, scans, ultra sounds - you name it I got it, treatment was first class. The first Saturday I was in the chap in the next bed decided to bless us all with his jug of water which he had made holy water and I got soaked, along with the doctor on call and 3 of the nurses. The doctor was a bit annoyed about it and asked "Why did you bless that man and him not even a catholic?", I asked how she knew that (it was likely on my notes) and she more or less said I didn't look like one, so maybe there is something to the old trope about the eyes being too close together after all @LongTimeLurker. I think the poor chap was out of his head on medication, he was very apologetic in the morning, but I don't think he remembered very much about it. Another night 3 members of staff had to restrain another patient, who would not stay in bed, he was trying to remove his cannula plus he was hooked up to oxygen and had a catheter in, he could have done himself serious damage. Eventually they got him injected with something and he calmed down. I drifted off to sleep but woke in the middle of the night to see his bed was gone. Moved to ICU. Or so they said... They have a funny way of telling you things - "Do you know you've got an irregular heart rhythm, Mr Jacksgranda?". Well I do now, God knows how long I've had that, they must have picked it up from the ECG. I went in on 3 inhalers and a nasal spray, and came home on 3 inhalers, a heart tablet, fluid tablets (they are deadly, up at the toilet every half hour), a blood thinning tablet and antibiotics. Got the chest drain out after 4 days and made steady progress, but every time I was to get home there was another setback - my temperature went through the roof the afternoon before I was to get home so that knocked that on the head, I could have got home but with the district nurse coming in to administer an iv antibiotic but I didn't fancy that, and then yesterday they decided to keep me one more day, but the consultant was very pleased with my progress this morning and was happy with the ultra sound, so that was me on the road, can't say I was sorry, I know I was in the right place but it was a bit wearisome at the end up. What can you say about the staff? Consultants, doctors, nurses, ancillary staff, cooks, cleaners, porters, ambulance men - magnificent. The things they have to do (especially the nurses). Cleaning shitey arses, fetching the commode, emptying urine bottles and catheter bags, changing beds, reassuring anxious and fractious patients (including this one) and relatives, cutting up food, feeding patients, administrating drugs, taking blood pressure and checking oxygen levels all the while with the highest degree of compassion, empathy and professionalism, constantly n their feet, all with the threat of covid hanging over them, every MP, MLA and MSP etc should be made to shadow an NHS person's shift (I mean the whole 13 hours, not just a smiley 10 minute facebook post Our wonderful NHS staff), maybe then something would get done about proper funding and training. The Indian nurses are the best, such gentle natures. Finally I'm home after 4 weeks and 3 false starts. TL/DR As I've already said my wife said "You gave us all a bit of a scare" but I'm all right now, thanks to the incomparable NHS.

I don't see how failing to score from 18 attempts and conceding 2 from 2 attempts will have us right up there. If this was a one off, I could see your point, but this sort of result seems to have been a recurring theme this season.

They're playing Everton shortly, so no...

Happy now?

Home win in the Cup, 2-0 against Horsham (who they?). ETA: Level 7, should have been no problem at home, so result as expected, thankfully.

F****** b********** c****** hell

F*** me, the Tommy f****** Pearson f****** era wouldn't be f****** in it. F****** joke.

Normal service resumed. F****** hell

Did they not win the Diddy Leagues Cup, too?