Pol

Brechin defender @GerryMcLauchlan is a class act on Twitter. Good banter and quite a comedian. EDIT to add: Brian 'Limmy' Limond is a complete c**t! Utter moron and tweets shite.

Definite winner! It was a Lewis Coult RT that brought her to my timeline.

David Hasslehoff followed me on my old account before it was hacked. Now I have lots of followers who are adamant on having sex on the moon next year! Follow me if you like - @pdw_13. I tweet quite a lot, usually about football or nights out.

Can't believe Dusk in Stirling has not come up more often!! Below we have a fine example of horrendous tan ... Followed by horrendous hair ... Then some Ronaldo teeth from the Ox in the purple dress ... Someone get the guy in white some toothpaste! Wow, just wow ... Who wants to give her a birthday kiss?

I was playing football last Sunday, got tackled, flipped and landed on my head. I thought nothing else of it till the pain got increasingly worse over the duration of the week. Went to the Dr's on Friday to find out I have very minor brain damage and spasm'd neck muscles. I got a dose of diazepam and a day off work on Saturday. Pain came back yesterday, went to the Dr's again today and got a double dose of diazepam. Not to drink, drive or work till Friday at the earliest

I got one last Christmas - N13 PDW. N13 is my birthday (Nov 13th) and PDW are my initials.

Did someone shite in it?

The Karate Kid (2010) Went on Sunday night to see the previews and it was breathtaking!! Jaden Smith was tremendous in it - he really has the potential to be a better actor than his father Will. Jackie Chan was superb as Mr Han. Dre Parker (Jaden Smith) is a 12-year-old living in Detroit when his widowed mother gets a job in China. Once in China, Dre misses home and wants to go back to the US. His mother tells him that China is home now, and he must learn to accept his new home. Dre begins to like China when he falls for his classmate Mei Ying (Wenwen Han). Dre's feelings for Mei Ying are seen by Cheng (Zhenwei Wang) the class bully who is out to stop it. Cheng puts Dre to the ground with ease using his Kung Fu training. Dre doesn't have a chance using the little karate that he knows, and Cheng proves it the next time he sees Dre. Dre is getting beaten badly when Mr. Han (Jackie Chan) the maintenance man, secretly a Kung Fu Master, stops the fight. Dre and Mr Han visit the school of Kung Fu Cheng attends to confront his master and tell of his attack. The master then gives Mr Han an ultimatum as they leave - one of you fight, the boy (against Cheng) or you (against Cheng's master). Mr Han then proposes Dre competes at a Kung Fu championships on the condition the Kung Fu students leave Dre whilst he trains, which the master accepts. Now Mr Han, who originally refused to teach Dre Kung Fu, is doing so. The scenes of Mr Han training Dre are heartwarming yet funny at times. Also, both actors done their own stunts and Jaden went through a vigorous Kung Fu course in order to do the film without a stunt double. I'd give The Karate Kid (2010) a rating of 8 out of 10. It would have easily got a 9 or higher had

Toy Story 3 (2D) What a truly awesome film from start to finish! I went on opening night with my pal (I think this may be the only exception to ever seeing a film on opening night with a pal without it being 100% homosexual!!) and I've never seen Cineworld so busy! Cant believe how close to tears I was at the end though - twice!!! The last line of the film sums up the whole trilogy. What a fantastic trilogy Toy Story has been - with the second film being as good as the first and the third film being as good as the second. The only thing I disliked about Toy Story was them leaving out some characters however it made way for older characters like the Aliens to really take the spotlight. Toy Story 3 gets 10 out of 10 from me because the original Toy Story was the film of my childhood (along with the Lion King) and even 15 years later, I feel Disney Pixar has done it justice. 10/10!!! Edit: Going to see Toy Story 3 in 3D tonight and The Karate Kid on Monday night.

I don't find the fact of paying my respects petty and irritating, its more the fact that she's gone and her cremation is her final farewell if you will.

WOW! Thats pretty shit jeffro, good luck with the meeting mate! Hope all goes okay and they withdraw their accusation. My PTTGOYN is its my pals mums cremation tomorrow

PTTGOYN - girlfriends/life ect! f**k them!

I suppose

Went into the Crown before the I got the bus to the game today, went up to the bar ... Pol: Can I get a Miller please? Barman: Aye, nae bother ... *hands Miller over* Pol: *Gives over £5 ... Receives x amount of change* Cheers. Pol: *Walks over to FrazzyAKL, drinks the neck* f**k me that tastes watery. FrazzyAKL: *Takes said Miller, tastes, nods* Bet its aff date. Pol: Hah, nah it cant be ... *Checks for date ... 18/02/10* It fucking is!! I'm taking it back. Barman: Aye? Pol: Millers aff date. Barman: Eh?! *Glaiket expression across mug* Pol: Aye, look *hands Miller over * Barman: Aw aye *walks over, checks a few Miller, comes back over* Can a get yi oanyhin else son? Pol: A Miller? Barman: There aw off Pol: Gies a Bud then. Barman: *Walks over, gets Bud, hands it over* Pol: *Turns to walk away* Barman: Ahem, son Pol: *Turns round* Barman: The Bud? ... *Puts hand out in expectance of money* Pol: Eh? The Miller was aff date! Barman: Aye, but the Bud isnae. Pol: *Stands for a second to consider is this guy being serious ...* Dae you know what trading standards would do tae yous? Selling off date products, and then not removing the others after knowin that there are more aff date? Barman: *Grunts, turns away, chats to another punter* Some people, eh?!