Old Diamond

FIFA 2020 - the football strategy game that gives your computer/console a virus three quarters of the way throught the league

A flight attendant sees a suspicious looking couple on board, so she reports it to the Captain immediately. “Sir, I think we have a case of human trafficking! There is a very pretty, hot & sexy looking female passenger on board, who looks sad & quite frightened. The man sitting beside her is a fat old slob, who looks like a letch, very sullen, mean, and dangerous!". The captain responds..., “Patricia, I’ve told you this before. This is Air Force One...”

Donald Trump goes on a presidential tour of Israel. While he is on a tour of Jerusalem he suffers a heart attack and dies. The undertaker tells the American diplomats accompanying him, "You can have him shipped home for $50,000, or you can bury him here, in the Holy Land, for just $100.” The American diplomats go into a corner to discuss for a few minutes. They return with their answer to the undertaker and tell him they want Donald Trump shipped home. The undertaker is puzzled and asks, "Why would you spend $50,000 to ship him home when it would be wonderful to be buried here and you would spend only $100?” The American diplomats reply, "Long ago a man died here, was buried here, and three days later he rose from the dead. We just can't take the risk."

Dumbarton 2 - 2 Forfar East Fife 1 - 0 Stranraer Falkirk 3 - 1 Montrose Peterhead 0 - 2 Airdrie Raith Rovers 4 - 0 Clyde

Delighted to be proved a pish talker, curse lifted, onwards and upwards

Beginning to wonder if Andy Ryan is cursed, we were going well, then his loan signing was announced and everyone was elated thinking we would score at will, but since he came on as a sub against East Fife we have not scored a single goal!

I remember clearly the old strips with the numbers within the diamond, the first team strips had a solid number, the reserve team strips were different, and had the number in red outline only

I was checking out at Tesco today when I noticed the man in front of me put one thing on the conveyer belt... A box of condoms. Not only did he notice me staring but decided to make super uncomfortable eye contact. So to lighten the mood I put my bottle of ketchup on and said "looks like we've both bought something to put on our sausages"

Wid - but I'd need someone to put me up to it

Innes Murray to come in on loan from HIbs? https://www.dailyrecord.co.uk/sport/local-sport/airdrie-boss-ian-murray-prepares-21399962

OK I am of the Pink Floyd/Led Zeppelin Generation, but I do know of the DKs , so yes a whooshette

Some of those shirts cost more than the players that wore them

The Sex Pistols? (alledgedly)? The Damned (they were)?

Would be great if they reopened the old "town! station and shut the harbour station, the old station was almost right behind the stand.