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About Dilbert

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  1. Can you imagine a wee three line Gers match summary, hidden among the 3rd Division results. That would be bliss indeed Never gonna happen though
  2. First steady girlfriend, way back in the early 70's. She was 17, I was 19, and home on leave from the army. I stayed at her mum's house and kipped on the couch for the night (aye right). Anyway, sitting down for breakfast, thinking "this is the biz, I got a shag last night, and her maw thinks the sun shines out ma erse". Up pipes the girlfriend, " Mum! do you both have to cum at the same time to get pregnant?". Cue the coughing fit wi cornflakes spewing out ma nose. Her mum gives her a straight answer and disnae even flinch. That was one crazy fucked up family, and thankfully I ditched her before I ended up stuck wi her. Having seen her in the street recently, time hasnae been very kind tae her, after 6 bairns and too much bevvie and drugs Narrow squeak
  3. On holiday in Corfu a few years back with the family. Me and the other half were enduring the "hotel entertainment" (loose description). Anyway, I happened to look up and comment that the moon looked "huge tonight". A few moments silence, then up she pipes, "I know it might seem stupid, but is that the same moon we see back home?". What planet are they from?
  4. Somebody take the poor sheepie a laptop for fuksake. If this thread doesn't lift his spirit, nothing will. Reel him in Ric
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