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dundeebarry

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dundeebarry last won the day on November 16 2013

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About dundeebarry

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    f**k sake

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    http://www.tecklebooks.co.uk

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    Male
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    Parts unknown
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    Dundee

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  1. I hit the bookies today and threw mad cash at Dundee to win, Moussa to score anytime, Hooly to cry anytime, a Derry pitch invasion after the fourth goal which, bizarrely, will be scored by a deeply emotional Hooly, and more than seven corners. I got odds of 4/7 on it, because Ladbrokes ken all that shit is highly likely. Thankyou.
  2. Dundee have Dundee'd the f**k out this situation. Which, as ever, is as commendable as it is entertaining. I reckon he changed his mind because Nelms offered him a wardrobe filled with the highly stylish and fetching cardigans Oor Neil was rocking on match days. Money talks, but cardigans fucking shout.
  3. This is up there with ideas such as fielding a hologram Albert Kidd in games against Hearts and bringing back Caballero.
  4. The whole ball has to cross the line.
  5. God help Neil McCann's wife. Her mad shagger of a husband is demanding enough in the bedroom at the best of times. Tonight he's coming home with an unprecedented erection, a resurgent Scott Bain and a docile but eager Marcus Haber. All three will have their fun. Bain will keep his goalie gloves on throughout. I'll be keeping an eye out for new additions to Pornhub's "Derry Rhumba" category in the hope they film and share the action. Dundee FC: Staying up.
  6. Be interesting to see what physical approach McCann takes, also. Will he be a dugout-leaner or a technical area patroller?He may even choose to run the show from the tv gantry, as that's where he's most used to watching the match from.
  7. Sounds like a title for a sitcom. Hartley moping about being shite at stuff, everything going wrong. Burning the toast, stubbing his toe, slipping on a banana skin. He doesn't talk, he just becomes increasingly miserable until it finishes with a close-up of his pus for one final weary sigh and slump of the shoulders. A jingly theme tune comes on as the end credits roll. Poor Paul.
  8. His attitude is no doubt at the heart of it. For whatever reason, he gives less of a f**k and it shows. Which is a real shame, because he has been and still can be a brilliant goalie. Speaking of goalies, my wee brother works for an oil company up in Aberdeen. He text me during the week to say Jim Leighton was in his work selling lifeboats. Jim Leighton is a lifeboat salesman. Apparently he still greases his napper with Vaseline, tae. Seems unnecessary to me, but maybe sweat still threatens one's eyes when you sell fucking boats for a living. I text him back saying I might enjoy receiving a lifeboat as a present. I eagerly anticipate my next birthday.
  9. This is a little controversial, but Bain has conceded goals that have made me consider the possibility he's purposefully not trying as hard as he might. Like he did enough to make an effort to make a save but didn't go 100% at it. It is most likely wildly misplaced and inaccurate, but my gut feeling has suggested there's something amiss with him.
  10. Hiya pal! Long time no speak, I trust you're well. Apologies if you already used that aine. It was almost too obvious, I suspected it may have been done. "Why am I not surprised" was unwarranted and I expect an apology, you shite-futba-teamed c**t.
  11. I took a moment to consider Papa Shango's voodoo penis there, Boo. I haven't done that in weeks. Thank you for the reminder.
  12. "Lads, the name's Neil McCann, not Neil McCannot. Think about that. Also, if any of you were born in Edinburgh in the mid-to-late 90s there's a 87% statistical chance I'm your dad. Get out there and do it for your old man."
  13. Neil McCann has previous for answering the emergency hotline and sorting shit out for Dundee. We've grabbed him out the telly and thrust him into the midst of a crisis with teckle results before, and as such his appointment as Big Chief at Dens makes absolute perfect sense. Good luck, Neil McCann. As an aside, Neil "Big Chief" McCann has a reputation as a top shagger. There's no denying he's a suave looking c**t. Those suits he rocks on the telly aren't from Primark, they are at least from an M&S outlet store and possibly even Slaters. Well dressed is well prepared, aye. Rumour has it that he pumped half of Edinburgh when he played for Herts. I personally ken seven people from the nation's capital and five of them admit to taking a length off the Big Chief. Two of them are straight males. One is mildly disabled. Neil McCann doesn't give a f**k. Dundee FC: Staying up.
  14. Controversial as it may be, I'm of the opinion Jim McLean is the man to step in and sort shit out at Dens. 107 years old and demented as he may be, the baldy f**k has pedigree. Decent player in his day, tae. If he steps in as player/manger him and Gowser would form a formidable midfield.
  15. I have the basis of a special edition update to the Leigh Griffiths Blog in my head already, should the situation take a turn for the Jocky. I'm good to go here, Twinkle. I'm just waiting on word from Davie Nelms, or whatever the American c**t's called, before getting tore in.
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