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"My CV blows everyone else's out the water. Does yours?" "My CV says I'm currently employed."

How it started How it ended

Good work

Who is this Peter Grant? I am Grant Peter.

A few weeks ago, when i said "Glass out" i hadn't finished. I was going to say "Glass out-performed all the other candidates in a rigourous and impartial selection process and we should give him more time." Called it.

Just want to let you guys know, at the moment all is going well.

Surely a ban for suggesting bates.

He will be replaced by someone who knows nothing about Scottish Football and doesn't care about it to provide consistency with the rest of their coverage.

There are a stunning number of older men who seem obsessed about a wee 18 year old Swedish lassie, to the point of absolute rage. That this includes the likes of Putin and Bolsonaro is outstanding enough but her total rinsing of Trump was god-tier level trolling. Glorious.

Someone on the match thread (@Hank Scorpio?) asked for the stats on our goals conceded with BRS on the park compared to without as there seems to be a strong link between his sub appearances and goals conceded. I think he has his uses and he has had some good performances (Morton & Livi away, second half vs Aberdeen, Forfar at home) but he seems like the type of player that really struggles to get up to speed when coming off the bench, looking totally lost and the stats really back that up. Below are the goals against record with and without BRS as well as his record when starting compared to coming on as a sub. This is done purely on minutes on the field and goals conceded in that time: With (All competitions) Goal against every 60.7 minutes Without (All competitions) Goal against every 132 minutes With (League) Goal against every 45 minutes Without (League) Goal against every 101 minutes BRS Starts (In all competitions) Goal against every 123 minutes BRS sub appearance (In all competitions) Goal against every 17.5 minutes (6 goals conceded in 105 minutes across 7 sub appearances) So basically, he has his uses but for the love of god, don’t use him as a sub…

Significant birthday coming and Mrs a-p was determined to treat me. Cue much online searching and twisting of melon. Decided I’m a wee bit past pretending to be some sort of diver or James Bond but I do think I can make a reasonable fist of being an urbane man about town so settled on:

Aww, there he goes now..

Aye but whit wan?

It will be the one that floats around the southern ocean cadging fags off boats, asking what school penguins went to and repeatedly telling the world that “icebergs make the Antarctic”.

Bit of a cock up from Tesco....

Following on from the post just earlier from thommohawk , I have this in my house. Passed down from the grandfather (something no DAB could say). Think it's from the 60s although maybe any older heads in here could clarify that. Few marks on it, pulled it out there and it had gathered more dust than Granny Dangers salad box. Still in decent nick though. It runs in the blood. Thank you.

My golf towel. No idea how old this is but guessing 20 odd years!

She seems incapable of asking a question without nervously rambling for another 30 seconds and potentially throwing a second question out mid ramble.

You could see that coming a mile off. He's looked increasingly frustrated the whole game and Bet365 had crazy odds for a guy already on a yellow.

I have a very big headache

Penalty to Rangers! Just getting in some practice.

Well done to John Beaton in managing to piss off and dumbfound both sets of fans in equal measure yesterday Probably his worst bit yesterday was when Oor Charlie lost possession on the halfway line, dived and grabbed the ball with both hands then feigned a headknock to try and prevent a booking only to get the freekick decision in his favour

Week 12 results A range of scores across the board this week but it was dynamo_rumble who topped the weekly league with 8 points. Name Correct Score Correct Result Total Points dynamo_rumble 2 2 8 CRFC Blue 2 1 7 esortnom 2 1 7 fifer67 1 3 6 flyfifer48 1 3 6 laughing gravie 1 3 6 Ammo - Airdrie 1 2 5 AndyDD 1 2 5 Glenmavid Diamond 1 2 5 roman_bairn 1 2 5 Wilson92FFC 1 2 5 Chapelhall chap 0 4 4 CoveRangers1922 1 1 4 Grangemouth Bairn 1 1 4 Jaggy Snake 1 1 4 Mon_The_Fife 1 1 4 Mr November 0 4 4 shawfielder 1 1 4 watdeadlyone 1 1 4 williebraveheart 1 1 4 Bairney Rubble 0 3 3 C. Muir 0 3 3 cb_diamond 1 0 3 fatdoug1938 0 3 3 scottsdad 0 3 3 African Sunset 0 2 2 Angus of the Mo 0 2 2 Bairn in Exile 0 2 2 BFTD 0 2 2 Clyde85 0 2 2 haufdaft 0 2 2 jpm 0 2 2 Polarbear 0 2 2 51 Bairn 0 1 1 bobthespider 0 1 1 ebobsboy 0 1 1 falkirkzombie 0 1 1 Larry Hood 0 1 1 marko 0 1 1 Zanetti 0 1 1 badgerthewitness 0 0 0 BW Charlie 0 0 0 BWAClyde 0 0 0 Marshmallo 0 0 0 Stevo Fife 0 0 0 Vegetableman 0 0 0 In the overall league Chapelhall chap managed to pull away by a couple of points to go clear at the top. Name Correct Score Correct Result Total Points Chapelhall chap 9 19 46 CoveRangers1922 7 23 44 fatdoug1938 7 23 44 williebraveheart 7 22 43 Zanetti 7 22 43 bobthespider 7 20 41 esortnom 6 23 41 flyfifer48 7 20 41 Ammo - Airdrie 6 22 40 CRFC Blue 8 16 40 fifer67 5 25 40 haufdaft 6 21 39 Jaggy Snake 4 26 38 Grangemouth Bairn 6 18 36 Larry Hood 4 23 35 Mon_The_Fife 5 20 35 Wilson92FFC 6 17 35 badgerthewitness 6 16 34 C. Muir 4 21 33 watdeadlyone 6 15 33 Bairn in Exile 4 20 32 BFTD 3 23 32 BW Charlie 6 14 32 ebobsboy 4 20 32 falkirkzombie 3 23 32 African Sunset 6 13 31 Bairney Rubble 5 16 31 cb_diamond 3 22 31 Mr November 2 25 31 BWAClyde 3 21 30 Marshmallo 5 15 30 Polarbear 3 21 30 shawfielder 3 21 30 Jambo98 6 11 29 roman_bairn 6 11 29 Stevo Fife 3 20 29 Clyde85 3 19 28 dynamo_rumble 3 19 28 51 Bairn 2 21 27 jpm 2 20 26 Wee Jockie 3 17 26 AFalkirkBairnB 4 13 25 laughing gravie 3 13 22 Vegetableman 3 13 22 AndyDD 3 12 21 Glenmavis Diamond 3 10 19 Maxismydog 1 15 18 broomiesniper 3 8 17 LeodhasXD 1 14 17 FortescueFotheringhamSmyth 3 7 16 Scott-Replay 3 6 15 marko 1 11 14 thelocalcat 1 10 13 Mantis Toboggan 1 8 11 scottsdad 1 8 11 Angus of the Mo 1 7 10 Karpaty Lviv 2 2 8 CapitalDiamond 2 0 6 HoustonSpider99 1 3 6 mcqbez 0 6 6 Silverton End 1 3 6 ewan_fife 0 4 4 King Kebab 0 4 4 sparkys dream 1 1 4 Come Away The Clyde 0 3 3 Cambuslang Fiifer 0 2 2 Reggie Perrin 0 2 2 the snudge 0 2 2 Clyde soccer trendy 0 0 0 dirvy 0 0 0 Week 13 fixtures will follow shortly, thanks for playing!

I swear a lot, I've trained myself to swear in Spanish and Dutch at work so that colleagues don't know just how much of a sweary c**t I am. When I was leaving the Netherlands back in 2011 I had a leaving interview with my boss (in Dutch) who was genuinely sad to see me go, he said that I had left my mark on the organisation. I asked in what way, he said "just listen". The canteen was next door and you could hear them all chatting away in Dutch and saying fucking every second word, I only swore in English at work while speaking Dutch, they had all started to do the same. Some fucking mark to leave.

Peter’s hatched a plan to get his job back

Let Tony choose his own strike partner each week

My wife dresses up and gives all the wee kids sweeties when they come to the door. Here's our pumpkins -

Was an entertaining game to watch but one if you're a Cove fan you think we should have got more from. The first 40 minutes we could have been out of sight (but weren't) and went into the break losing 2-1. With Harry Milne and Blair Yule soon to be fully fit that will give us width back and more threat in those areas. Scott Ross will strengthen the back line too. Queen's looked short of a Fyvie in the middle and we looked short of a Longridge, Brown or Connell to replace quarterback Vigurs (too defensive/slow). Cove lacking an AM / number 10 and Queen's lacking a 20 goal a season striker. Quitongo will strengthen the Spiders. For me Mitch & Rory > Murray & McHugh. Queen's summer recruitment is better than Cove's. 2 good sides who desperately want promotion and could cause some Championship sides problems as is.

Two ball obsessed spaniels

My two efforts from last year. Due to Covid I have not bothered me @rse this year.

Well done to all involved at the Bankies. My dad is a born and bred Bankie and grew up supporting Clydebank. He often regales us with tales of travelling down to Stranraer on Tuesday night. After moving to Cumbernauld in the 80s, he now goes to Clyde games alongside me and my brother. At the time my brother and I were both getting into football, it was the early 2000s and unfortunately the original Clydebank had been taken over by Airdrie (and I use “taken over” politely) and my dad wanted us to support our local team so Clyde it was. Regardless, he’s delighted tonight. The scenario of “Who would you support?” if we ever met was a frequent topic of conversation when we were growing up. Even now he’s saying he can’t lose. We’ve still gone along to plenty of Clydebank games including two of the promotions at Glenhead, one at Bellshill, one at Holm Park, a fair few Sectional League Cup finals and, of course, the Junior Cup final. I have fond memories of watching the likes of Mark Hailstones, Andy Kenna, Stefan Gonet, Stevie Dallas and Stevie Dymock, Chris Mackie and Alan Jack for my self-proclaimed second team growing up. The ultimate glory hunting Clydebank supporter, I suppose. Having been there on Monday, I would not be surprised if Clydebank turned Clyde over. We really are in dreadful form and must be the slowest team playing in any senior league on the planet currently. Clydebank on the other hand, were brave, pacy down the flanks (in the second half anyway) and battled away well in midfield. Whilst blind loyalty has me hoping for a Clyde victory, if any team are to beat us, as many have this season, I’d be happier if it were Clydebank. Looking forward to being at Holm Park next month.

https://www.theguardian.com/world/live/2021/oct/31/covid-live-news-coronavirus-origins-china-us-intelligence-report?page=with:block-617ebfad8f08fe3ad9f452c2#block-617ebfad8f08fe3ad9f452c2 I'd say that a drop of 33% in the space of eleven days is somewhat more than 'slight', but I've not spent the last month shrieking for 'Plan B' and need to cover the fact that we were wrong yet again!

So after missing out on the Oris Aquis Date used on chrono24. I decided to bite bullet and buy brand new. This actually worked out better as turns out a store card I have gives me a 20% discount in Goldsmiths and Oris is included. So saved £320. It arrived yesterdday and I love it

A real sad, sad day for football.

When I wallpapered our old house I wrote “I WILL KILL AGAIN” in red paint underneath as a gift for whoever strips it in years to come.

Hamilton's approach to timewasting was essentially an extremely naive team trying to look streetwise and making a colossal arse of it. Every team on the planet timewastes and shitfests when they're defending a lead, but if you're being so blatant about it so early that you're getting a player booked for it in the 75th minute after a couple of warnings have already been given then that's not effectively running the clock down: that's just drawing the referee's attention to how much time you're taking over every single stoppage. Having already had that booking, to contrive to get another yellow card over a throw in again and have so many individual instances of cramp that the ref's immediate reaction was not to look to the touchline for the physio but to point at his watch to say "I'm going to add this time on by the way"... aye, you've absolutely fucked it and the correct amount of time was added on as a result of that stupidity.

'Romanii eunt domus'.

I loved that game today. Said to my mate when Hearts got their penalty that it may be the best thing, as the team were playing within themselves first half. Second half performance was superb. Cracking atmosphere too……….keep the radio appearances coming Mr Cormack, I was clearly wrong to find it a tad toe-curling at the time. My evening entertainment has been a night with legends Kennedy and McMaster. When asked about Calvin Ramsay, all Kennedy would say was “there’s no way that fkin Stevie May is doing that to me, and WTF was he doing for Celtic’s winning goal”……..he’s not sharing the love. He also reckons certain anglos in the Argentina 78 squad were “poison” and were apparently known to have cheered when Rep made it 3-2.

What a guy Paul McGowan is by the way! Every time we are all thinking, yeah, he's done, he performs magnificiently and shows why he's still an important member of this squad. Has an important part to play this season and he could be that number 10 we are needing that keeps the striker from being cut off. McGowan is 2 appearances behind Gordon Wallace in our all time stakes. He's 5 appearances off entering the top 30 most appearances for Dundee FC. A mindboggling fact about Paul McGowan is that he's played for Dundee FC more than Jim Duffy, Alan Gilzean or Iain Anderson. It's hard to wrap my head around. He consistently gets written off and consistently proves he can be an asset provided he's played in the right position. Clearly, as Wednesday showed - he's not got it in him to be a standard CM anymore but behind the striker today I thought he was top class. He's not necessarily a starter every week but I bet he's a player in 20 years time as the game gets softer and softer that we'll say, 'wish we had Paul McGowan in that dressing room to give them a rocket up their arse'.

The legend retiring and the rovers get a mention!!!

Europa Conference League 2073 - Fourth Qualifying Round