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Ahem - 53 days until the new season starts - the time taken for a round the world train trip.

After today’s sham, anyone in Scotland who votes “No” in Indyref 2 should be ashamed of themselves. Imagine voting for a fucking flag over governing ourselves. Not to mention having the complete piss ripped out of us every single day by our Masters in WM. f**k every single one of you Unionist aresholes. Rant Over. I feel better now [emoji2]

I created the summary video. Cheers for the feedback. Thank you. Sent from my SM-G955F using Pie and Bovril mobile app

53 days until the new season starts - the time taken for food to be totally digested and fall out your arse. Which is of course, total bollox

That is utterly horrendous patter.

You were also desperate to suggest the commercial dept of lacking the "joined up thinking" to organise such a thing though. The way people go on you'd think people at the club sit on their fingers wondering what to do with their day until someone who knows much better points them in the right direction! Go ask local businesses if they've had enough of Danny phoning them or visiting and trying to punt something else at them yet. He's at it every spare minute he has. It's very easy to post online that you can get this, that and the next thing sponsored. It's a whole lot harder to find someone who will actually part with the cash in what is a rural area with a fairly depressed local economy and little in the way of significant advertising budgets. Every "yes" is preceded by a multitude of "no's" and the club is very grateful to every single sponsor who helps out but it's nowhere near as easy as is being made out.

Ok lets dissect this, The Shard- owned by Qatar. Nessie- about as real as the likelihood of a good brexit deal, also token ‘jock’ inclusion. Alton Towers- broken failing theme park, bit like brexit. The spit fires pictured are Canadian. The steel plant is foreign owned and likely to suffer greatly from brexit. Finally, my absolute favourite the Angel of the North, an EU funded art installation. Yeh sums it up for me.

I disagree about things getting out. I keep a close eye out for this because as one of the people who always knows signings in advance, I hate stories being leaked in case it throws suspicion on me. The majority take people by surprise though. For example, I was given the names on Sunday of the players who'd verbally agreed to join us. Nobody got Fasan before he was announced and so far none of the others have appeared online either, despite Keithgy's hints to the contrary. I agree we have canaries but at the moment they seem to be either muzzled or marginalised. Not sure about the strips. I know the stock wasn't coming in until June so I assume it's a Puma supply issue rather than deliberate choice by the club. Only an idiot would delay the arrival of a sought-after item and I'm sure you'll agree that LB doesn't come into that category. Oh, and I followed up your director advice re the Sibbald deadline. It didn't happen. There were no dates missed, no failures to deliver documents, nothing. Everything was done as it should have been. Either that or I'm being lied to by several directors and club staff who have very good reason to know. I'm open to being persuaded otherwise but you'll have to name names if you want me to consider it.

Someone get me fucking telt

We have a squad of 19 signed up it's hardly alarming.

Couldn't give a f**k. Labour is for five years, and still means Brexit. Independence is for life.

This is about as tragic as it gets.

What a f*ckin mess, I don’t know what the other ‘Unionist’ P&B posters feel (meagre in numbers that we are) but the argument for an Independent Scotland, and to be rid of this absolute shambles becomes increasingly harder to resist by the day? I just can’t buy anymore some of the absolute horse shit that I hear on my travels from pro-Brexit supporters, that still refuse to acknowledge where this is taking us.

As Ian Liddel-Granger is the absolute identikit of a Tory nonce, it's a solution he'll probably be facing himself in the not too distant.

Good grief Cunting Labour have now abstained on the Devolution amendments. They are now finished forever in Scotland.

Piracy you truly are the 100% definition of complete freakshow b*****d.

I saw Moonster in Asda last week - it may have seemed like I just wasn’t concentrating and didn’t take it in until I had walked past... But the truth is I was so filled with rage due to his brutal murder of this iconic thread, that I just to remove myself from the situation... There would have been loafs of bread, baguettes and crumpets flying everywhere if I hadn’t.

Best wishes and thanks to Callum crane. Many players over the years go Chuck Norris "missing in action" after signing a pre contract with another team. However Callum was the complete opposite and ran his guts out for us in the second half of the season especially in the play offs . A winner with undoubted quality to play at the top level . A very canny signing for Livingston and leaves with our best wishes .

He'd be a decent enough signing tbf, but let's say you do get up, you're signing a fair amount of Championship shite on extended deals. Championship players tend to get you out of the Championship - See us in the season we went up, but you usually need a clear-out, the fact you lot are signing average players on extended deals pleases me.

“We’ll just continue as we have done before,” said Johnston. Everything that is wrong with Scottish football, and indeed Scotland itself, encapsulated in eight words. Luckily, I seem to have a morbid sense of humour, so find this amusing, but I probably shouldn't. I'm assuming that no-one sane has any intention of letting this numptie and his acolytes anywhere near Tier 8, let alone 6.

1. Clearly 2. Far 3. Too 4. Early 5. To 6. Start 7. Thinking 8. About 9. Making 10. Any 11. Predictions 12. Livingston

I’m not gonna tease anyone. Here is a simple anagram of tomorrow’s signing. wilol flodo

Seeing as you're actually addressing the rest of the forum instead of calling against some uber lefty persona that I don't think even exists on here, I'll have a wee nibble. Genuine question, who or what are you rallying against all time on P&B? Everything I read from you seems like it's digging out some purple-haired US college trigglypuff type. Progressive! MSM! Identity politics! cultural appropriation! Do you think anyone on here gives a shite about that absolute guff? Your posts like you're trying to bait some American tumblr emo, rather than a bunch of folk who are probably about 95% working to middle class Scottish men. If folk on here don't like Trump, it's probably less to do with them being indoctrinated by CNN and more to do with the fact that he's a total w**k.

Cox v Gillie and Rab v Giorgi in the semis. Cox v Rab final imo. Quite fitting as I met Cox and Rab in the Mardi Gras after our Scottish Cup QF exit v Rangers in '98. I was gushing like the wee fan boy I was meeting a Dee legend, but Coxy deflected my attention to heap praise on Rab who was standing beside him. 20 years later and my hand still hurts from our league winning captain's vice-like handshake.

f**k off you utter roaster.

Told you.

There's a boy called EthanJublin (That's his Youtube name anyways) who makes some absolutely brilliant Dundee videos and I'm delighted he does because he captures moments and puts songs alongside that are absolutely quintessential in this day and age to capture the essence of being a Dee fan. For example, he has a Sara compilation that has Doris Day accompanying it and DJ Otzi accompanying a Cabalerro compilation. A few are wide of the mark for example Rab Douglas' and Speroni's but he has the important details. Excellent videos. That being said, I think this is an absolutely amazing summary of our last season, so well played to whomever made it:

It's time for the SNP to call this referendum. Other parties in a shambles. With an energetic good campaign it is very winnable.

I WANT NAMES NO RIDDLES f**k SAKE

PM, Caniçal, 38.

It would make a great commemorative plate.

Wilsons already sponsor QoStv, which is why their logo usually appears on the highlights packages. They've been sponsoring it for as long as its existed and provided the equipment for it.

I bought some shoes from a drug dealer. I don't know what he laced them with, but I've been tripping all day.

I’ll be at every home game and most of the away games so there’s no real risk of me not supporting my team. Your logic on this seems to be it’s always been shit so that’s an excuse for it to continue to be shit. The club needs cash to build a squad. They need to sell season tickets. Who are most likely to buy season tickets? Folk who had one last year. If a significant number of people hadn’t yet renewed, f**k it if even just one person hadn’t renewed then it’s worth someone sitting down for 10 minutes to draft an email saying ‘Dear punter, please renew now to help us build our squad for the season ahead’. It’s brutally obvious. The fact that the club haven’t taken this simple step shows they either don’t give a shit or the whole operation is woefully inept. I fear it’s actually a mix of both.

One for joe

If Dundee finish 4th I'll give everyone on here a blowy.

I've decided to fight the unionist meme fire with meme fire. Please RT.

That’s Big Country in on a two year deal as celebrity fans. Laszlo said “it will provide good competition for places from our other celebrity fans, like the lady from the television... mumble mumble, ramble ramble shamble mumble bumble ramble ramble”.

Did they find any old ones [emoji6] Sent from my SM-G950F using Pie and Bovril mobile app

Still absolutely rattled. Well done Trump.

Last Thursday on the 18.41 Edinburgh to Perth train it was again two annoying females. Big, fat, ugly, unhealthy looking and tattooed. They talked for the entire duration of the journey in loud voices. They got off at Kirkcaldy. They had driven to Kirkcaldy - presumably from somewhere else in Fife - by following a friend to the station. They were now unsure how to get home. During the timetabled 48 minute journey the slightly more chatty one received two phone calls from what I presume was her teenage daughter. To be fair her parenting skills didn’t seem entirely shite as she did care what time of night her daughter was back in doors, but she seemed a pretty shouty parent. I hadn’t been bad, but I felt like I was being chastised. Evidently the daughters pal’s dad doesn’t care what happens to his daughter as he spend all his time in “The Masons”. Not unnaturally Uber Fogbeast 2 thought this meant The Masons, but it’s actually a pub somewhere in Fife. Anyone care to guess which village in Fife they are from? The highlight was Fogbeast 1 describing “smouldering eyes” to Uber Fogbeast 2. These are evidently “come to bed eyes” that her and a pal were giving to random punters in the pub. I can only imagine the horror. Anyway. I can still recall most of this conversation 5 days on, which shows what an abysmal social life I have and possibly also that my memory isn’t completely fucked. People talking for an entire 48 minute journey (and the rest) in loud voice mode can give a man a bit of a headache. Bonus marks to Scotrail for extending the journey by holding us directly outside Stark’s Park for another 2-3 minutes. c**t rating: 10

edited for not being able to

It's very doubtful that they are. It's more likely that you just don't like them and probably have envy of their achievement so rationalise your feelings by calling them sociopathic or a psychopath.

Hope he releases you ya bellend

I’ll admit that I took this on my phone and that I put an Instagram filter on it...I will say however that I put some effort in going out late to capture the last of the evening light and I think it turned out quite nice.