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My wee guy smiling away this morning!

This thread needed some dredged up point-and-laugh material at this point imo.

I hope we get absolutely mown down by FIFA/UEFA.

Following today's Daily Mail article about bengals being absolute beasts I thought I'd post a photo of our cat the always fearsome Penelope

One of the armbands was next to Scott Brown's elbow

The Defenestration of Prague, Vaclav Brozik's picture of the treatment of a visiting football manager and his assistants, for sending out a team in 4-6-0

Also out previous bengal Mindy, she died after only 7 months as she had leukaemia.

Went for a haircut earlier, and the barber had some pretty robust views about homosexuality. Disagreeing with overt bigotry when the bigot is holding a massive razor to your face is tricky.

He's having it handed to him here. Lovely 121 to break the c***s throw and heart. Wright goes to number 3 after that which is certainly well deserved outwith MVG and Ando he is the most consistent especially in the bigger tournaments. It would be a travesty if he doesn't win a major at some point.

TFW ur ITK AF.

What about "Waghorn you were decent at Scottish Championship level but don't appear to be good enough to make the jump to the Premiership and therefore will never cut it in England"

It will all blow over soon, This story will next weeks chip wrappers........

Dear Martyn, I apologise for saying you are shite. I did not realise you wanted this kept secret.. yours sincerely, A Schoolboy

"IT'S OK EVERYONE, I'M NOT A BEAST! I'M TAKING A PICTURE OF THE TEACHERS PAPS!!!" Problem solved.

Sandy Denny : Crazy Lady Blues

Cat Boyd is the personification of a first year undergraduate essay written entirely on the morning of the due date.

He's halfway there with his strides off.

So he doesn't want the job full time but quite happy to interfere with 1st team affairs.....so we're looking for a yes man then?

Hibs fans should be ashamed of themselves, a man cannot eat his chips in peace any longer because of you animals.....

Dundee born James McIntosh Patrick's "The Tay Bridge From My Studio Window". Used to be in whatever the Art Gallery was/is called in Dundee.

The Kinks - Dedicated Follower Of Fashion

Just cashed this out. Watching the Dulka Prague game and they are battering Slavia Prague. Been doing well recently.

Sandy Denny : Like An Old Fashioned Waltz

Incredible String Band - Waltz Of The New Moon

^ never voted SNP in his life

The distance between the entrances of Tannadice and Dens Park...measured in metres rather than decades?

Anyone who types in an "accent" should have their reproductive organs removed with a rusty spoon.

I thought it was a result in the 1st round of the FA Cup.

Can't disagree, Gav. Takes after her maw, I assume?

First professional photographs in from toddlers group. Absolute smasher if I do say so myself.

Ken, Gan and such words - many from the Germanic/ Dutch lingo - proving that Scots over time (particularly in the east) picked stuff up from their hanseatic trading partners - and not just the "queen's English". Perfectly valid words to throw into your dialect - and doesn't sound too pikey (unless you're from Glenrothes).

Appeal cost for a Championship club is £250, refunded if you win. You don't get "points" for suspensions and card these days. They stopped all that three years ago. It will however count as a red card and if he gets another one for the same reason he'll get a two match suspension for a second offence in the same season, not a one match. You have to notify intention to appeal by 3pm on Monday but you don't lodge the actual evidence until 3pm Tuesday. I'd imagine what they lodged was an Intention to appeal before actually seeing all the available footage then, when they actually got it, it either doesn't bear out innocence, or doesn't show enough detail to prove it, so the appeal was withdrawn. It would seem fairly pointless to have submitted everything and then withdrawn it.

"Say that to my face" "Can I paraphrase? I can't remember the exact wording of my initial statement"

Apparently the boy who said it is being made to write an apology to Waghorn. I think that is a completely pointless exercise. Given how thick Waghorn has come across any time he's opened his mouth I'd be surprised if he can read. He really is a thick f**k.

Who is this alias then ? What a nick you are getting yourself in. Crabbit, moany faced old duffer. We are in a tougher league this season and that's on the back of a season in which we surpassed all expectations. We are not far off where we probably should be sitting with the team we have. I suggest you save your frilly drenching, feet stomping, tantrum until our position on the league is assessed after at least half of the season is over for f**k sake.

Rab is the top poster of the week, month and year just now. Not a bad achievement for such a notorious arsehole.

Basically, DA Baracus shat 1 pair out of his 3 pack of pants, and tried to blame it on someone else.

The Seeds - Pushin' Too Hard

Find the reactions to the Waghorn video quite annoying as I have said in another thread. He is obviously getting verbally abused when he's out minding his own business and gets riled by it and the little shit who is being a cheeky b*****d is probably walking about the town like he owns the place now whilst Waghorn is getting an online thrashing.

You told me you were a tall, muscular black man with tattoos. Something's not right here.

Arthur Russell - A Little Lost

I thought he'd "only" got two and his hat-trick had come in the first half of a 4-1 away drubbing of Accies. Must have that the wrong way round. That Thistle game was tremendous, as an added bonus it was Sportscene's game on Saturday night. We were 2-1 down approaching H/T and scored 2 in 2 mins, one being the result of a weird goalkeeping error after a passback from Jim Duffy. I had it on VHS for about three years until my lucky-to-still-be-alive sister taped over it with Eastenders. I think Kevin Bremner also got a couple and John McQuillan thumped home a decent effort as well. I also went to the second Firhill fixture that season. We were absolutely shite and lost 0-2.

Erm, shit, a first for me [emoji24]

Chins up Lisa and Pepp. Knowing what cats are like, they'll be looking down on you from cat heaven thinking "Get a grip you fanny". From cats leaving this mortal coil to ones just arrived on it, here's the boys one week on since joining the family. They never leave each others side. If they're not kicking f**k out of each other they're sitting about or sleeping together: Eta: Sleeping together in a closed eyes actually sleeping manner and not having homosexual, incestuous sex way. Thank you.

The music is so loud in that strip club nobody picks up on her accent anyway. Don't let it bother you.

That was a thoroughly embarrassing hour of television. Not a single person listening and actually taking stock of others opinions, just noise.

The moment where the massive jobby comes out and pushes Randy into the air ... it's just perfect. I love the idea that someone said, "No ... it'd be better if we make him rotate." The attention to detail is what makes it, like in the Mr Hankey episode where Kyle picks a shit out of the bowl, holds it for a sec, and then the top half of it just flops over. These guys really know their shit, Literally.

Pump her until she expires