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Showing content with the highest reputation since 18/06/18 in all areas

  1. 54 points
    This is my favourite photo of all time. Considering chucking out our entire wedding album and just replacing it with this. I want to be buried with this photo lying on my chest [emoji7][emoji7][emoji7]
  2. 51 points
  3. 47 points
    England is basically what Rangers would be like as a country
  4. 44 points
    Colombia gave us cocaine, beautiful women and class coffee. England gave us Brexit, Margaret Thatcher and Glenn Hoddle. 3-0 Colombia. Get these c***s out so I can enjoy the rest of the World Cup.
  5. 42 points
    The last thing Bali needs is another Flood.
  6. 41 points
    I hope England get fucked, and none of the sneering, morally superior, uber-offended, contrarian snowflakes on this sub-forum are going to convince me any differently.
  7. 41 points
  8. 40 points
    I know it’s a time for looking at English tears but keep in mind the big man that’s done this. He done f**k all really, got nailed by the ultimate brexiteer who shouted at him while he was poleaxed only to get up and batter one in. Please stand for the new king of dishing telts to the English, Mário Mandzukic
  9. 35 points
    Simple Simon met a barman, Going to buy a drink; Says Simple Simon to the barman I want gin, I'll take it pink. Says the barman to Simple Simon Show me first four pound; Says Simple Simon to the barman, Make it a quid, because I'm sound. Says the barman to Simple Simon, Look, I'll be quite blunt; I'm no stealing the stock for you ya dick, So f*** off ya stingey c***.
  10. 35 points
  11. 35 points
    If you’ve never prayed professionally you don’t have a fucking clue.
  12. 32 points
    Ah yes, B&Q, that renowned hotbed of romance. Some say Wickes is good for a fling, Homebase for a rebound, but everyone knows B&Q is where you take a girl you see a future with.
  13. 30 points
    Heads gone thread for this pish etc.
  14. 29 points
  15. 27 points
  16. 27 points
    To be honest mate its not ideal but we are going to be a very small fish in a very big pond this coming season. We don't want to be another "Brechin" and the only way to avoid that will to be make us hard to beat, hoping to get the odd goal here and there from counter attacking or from set pieces. If packing the defense and narrowing the pitch even slightly narrows the gap with Falkirk and the other 8 "#juggernaut" then so be it. If it does not work out then Goodwin might try a more expansive option but at this stage with the squad we have it would be suicidal to go toe to toe with Falkirk, Ross County, Partick, Dundee Utd, ICT and the like. As a side issue, Hartley took us through the divisions playing open attacking football but changed our set up and style once we got to the championship, realizing that we just could not compete playing that way. Anyway we will see how it goes, to be honest for us its a great league to be in this season, with our small ground its going to be more than half full every home game, hopefully with a wee bit of atmosphere, a lot more attractive proposition than the usual 400-500 hardy souls watching Stranraer, Albion Rovers and Queens Park (no disrespect to these teams but you get my drift). Hope you guys go well this season, always liked Falkirk and with Hartley there also, wish you all a successful season.
  17. 26 points
    Love this from a Spurs forum. RIP to probably the closest we will ever have to a God at Dens.
  18. 25 points
  19. 25 points
    Posted some of these before: (All from the same guy at work. Genuinely 100% true, swear on my sons life, right hand up to god etc these words came out of his mouth) His dad found £10,000 down the back of the sofa. Out on his boat in the Firth of Forth, the captain of a Submarine asked him over the Tannoy to move away - As he was approaching HMS property. He slid down the Pyramids. On the same holiday to Egypt he was almost refused entry to the UK - As border control didn't believe such a sallow skinned person could have possibly have come from his mum and dad. Apparently the tan he received on that holiday still exists to this day too. Gave his wife umpteen orgasms as she was sleeping. As he was pumping his girlfriend (doggy style), her flatmat came into the room looking for her glasses. Saw what was going on and looked over his shoulder and commented favourably on his massive manhood. After I asked him what he was doing at the weekend, his answer was "Fitting a £12,000 sound system in his mates Subaru Impreza." Managed to get from Strathaven to Manchester for the UEFA cup final in an hour and a half. He travelled north, from Strathaven again, going 90 mph for three hours solid. Saved East Kilbride shopping centre from a terrorist attack by chucking a Muslimy looking guy with a rucksack out of the fire escape. An unarmed duo comprising of himself and his brother saved a bookies in Paisley from an armed robber. He fought the same brother in the UK Karate championships. Although his mum and dad had to leave as it was such a bloodbath. His mate owns and runs the website Heaven666. There are probably a few I've forgotten.
  20. 25 points
  21. 24 points
  22. 24 points
    Yet another bog standard tory "rebellion" collapse. Cheaply bought off with a few extra acres for the retirement estate , a peerage and the chance of a swatch of Pippa Middletons clunge. There's no way out of it for the UK now lads. It's the impossible nonsense of unicorns and border zeppelins or no-deal. As was obviously the plan from the very start. Only one party and one thing for it. You're now either pro-indy or pro-c**t. Make your peace with it and take your pick.
  23. 23 points
  24. 23 points
    Gary Lineker, Gary Neville, Glenn Hoddle, Charlie Stayt, Jamie Vardy, Frank Skinner, Allan Russell, Clive Tyldsley, the guy who owns Wetherspoons, Nigel Farage, Ian 'Wrighty' Wright, Prince William, David Baddiel, Theresa May, Harry 'Good Honest Pro' Maguire, The Sun Sub who made up that 'Go-Kane' front page, Jessie '#JLingz' Lingard, Stephen Daisley, Steven Gerrard, Harry Kane, Stan Collymore, Phil 'Fizzer' Neville, Mark Pougatch and every Brexiteer in the country.
  25. 23 points
  26. 22 points
    The best thing about Mandžukić's goal was that Pickford had been taunting him whilst he lay injured on the ground only minutes earlier. Pickford is a horrible little scrote, and he got exactly what he deserved.
  27. 22 points
    FAO Jonathan Pierce FAO Glenn Hoddle FAO Clive "Clive" Tyldesley
  28. 22 points
    Lots of battle metaphors flying around the Brexit nutcases this morning. The Daily Mail in its lead article sets the tone.....'negotiators sent into battle with white flags'.....there's not much honour in Johnson 'being second over the top'........the UK will have 'colonial status'......May will 'stand and fight for the country'......Johnson 'declares war on Chequers plan'. All that within the first paragraph. It's a rather frightening view into the mind of your average right-wing fanatic. Do people really see this as a 'conflict situation' ? What a pathetic, wee, parochial, backwards, inferior country the UK has become. Continually having the need to fight some kind of historical battles about something. Drag yourself into the 21st century, you utter c*nts.
  29. 22 points
    Was home too late last night to do a proper summary on the game last night and I am now bored at work so i'll fire one out the now for anyone interested in how we got on. I was really pleased with the balance of the team especially in the first half of the game and it is quite obvious to see Hartley is trying to add as much width as possible to the side with Petra definitely being the main man for that. He had a really good game and showed some quality control and touches in tight space on the wing. It also looked like (at times) like we are going to try and play out from the keeper with Fasan always keen to play it short which I prefer. Looking at the first half I wouldn't be surprised if McGhee is being looked at as the RWB as the trialist was pretty rotten imo unless there is someone else in the pipeline. Robson was a real threat in spells and was playing really high up most of the game which is pleasing because I haven't seen that consistently since Leahy. Harrison could as someone actually predicted a while back be our diamond in the rough, clearly lacks in pace but is so comfortable on the ball and seemed to always find his man with his balls out from the back. Sammut is a very good passer of the ball and will probably just take a while to get up to the speed of men's football. Paton is clearly a very limited footballer but sounded like a very good leader for the young lads and he absolutely crunched GMS which was quite funny. Froxy is gonna frustrate us all season but there is gonna be flashes of brilliance so I guess we will just have to take the shit that comes with it. Turner looks like Nelson 2.0 but could be just a little bit more clinical and the Trialist striker is just far to lightweight to cut it in this league. Overall was pleasing to watch us compete with a first choice dons side even if it was a friendly, saw enough to make me really optimistic for the season ahead, also downside is a total lack of presence upfront which I hope will be rectified by Hartley before the season starts.
  30. 22 points
  31. 22 points
    I'm not using Scotrail ever again if that fucking clown is being let loose on the railway.
  32. 22 points
    Did you photograph a jigsaw puzzle?
  33. 21 points
  34. 21 points
    Hardly meaningless - you signed a shite, angry liability who has now decided he doesn't fancy playing for your team. I've done some careful checking, and the joke is still on Dunfermline here.
  35. 21 points
  36. 21 points
  37. 21 points
  38. 20 points
    EU to tell May to f**k off over Brexit and Liz Windsor to pop her clogs would make it perfect.
  39. 20 points
    Stuff like 'family of nations' is birthday caird pish and belongs in the fucking sea next to half and half scarves. Have a bit respect for yourself. If Hearts make the Scottish Cup semi-finals and play Motherwell, I'd want Motherwell to win obviously, because it's a rivalry. I won't be sitting thinking ' Hearts are part of the 'Edinburgh' family, or they're our 'neighbours', so let's back them'. I'd want Ryan Bowman's elbows to turn Berra's face into a bloody mess, I'd want Kipre to be snapping legs, I'd want every man, woman and child in maroon to be a seething, headsgone fucking mess at full time. Football is all about rivalries, something the bootlicking simpletons seem to have forgotten.
  40. 20 points
  41. 20 points
    Unemployed Professional liar Drugs courier Polis Tortoise sexer.
  42. 20 points
    Please thank Mrs SP for expanding my lexicon today. I'd been backpacking around the world for almost 2 years and almost out of money, was heading east through the US on the last leg. I lost my credit card while in Phoenix, Arizona and in those pre-Internet days had a hell of a job trying to get my bank to send out a new one. They wouldn't send it to my parents, I had no permanent address and whatnot. I was having money wired out, then going off for 2 weeks to see as much as I could before returning to Phoenix to find...still no credit card. I'd call them again (long distance from a payphone), find out what the excuse was this time and repeat the cycle. As a result, my dwindling funds were being used just going back and forth to Phoenix and I wasn't seeing the country the way I'd hoped. After a while, I took a job at the Backpacker's Hostel, working for free in exchange for my lodgings. One afternoon, a bunch of us went to a coffee shop and got talking to two cuties who were intrigued by the range of accents. One of them started coming over to the hostel to visit and then, showing me around Phoenix on my days off. Finally my credit card came through but I got a bit of a shock when the woman who ran the hostel immediately said. "That's great but now it's time for you to leave." Oh. This was late November and the places I still really wanted to see, New York, Boston and Chicago aren't easy to visit on a budget in winter. I was more than a bit bummed because it essentially meant my trip was over and had I known that, I could've gone home a couple of months earlier and saved some money. However, my new friend said "Well, I'm going on holiday next week and had planned to hire a dog-sitter. Why don't you stay at my place and look after my dogs for me. By the time I get back, you might have a better idea what you'd like to do." On new year's eve, after knowing each other for about 6 weeks, we got engaged. If I can manage another fortnight, we'll have been married 25 years next month.
  43. 20 points
    I think he looks more like an angry Rolf Harris these days tbf.
  44. 20 points
  45. 19 points
    Things that aren’t coming home.
  46. 19 points
    Some folk needing a reminder of the point of this glorious thread.....
  47. 19 points
    R.I.P Alan Gilzean Horrendous news, a Dundee legend.
  48. 19 points
    31 days until the start of the new season - the time it takes to boil Brussels sprouts to edible (At Disneyland Paris getting ripped off whilst struggling with a wheelchair and 3 grandkids. Can't promise to have something every day.)
  49. 19 points
    A real battle of the minds here.
  50. 19 points
    Yaasssss! Check who liked this!