I am responsible for the away page in the Raith matchday programme but often struggle to get information on specific players, often due to a lack of info on the websites. I can of course get their career stats but what I would like to do is discuss what kind of players they are, their strengths and weaknesses etc.

Of course, you would be given full credit for the info so if anyone wants to write 800-900 words on their squad, let me know here, thanks.

Hmm....how to say 'utter shite' using 8-900 words......

Not last Saturday they weren't

Just wait until this Saturday - good performance last week, optimism, club expected to be in relegation fight visiting Somerset.....sound familiar?

Too, too familiar.

Maybe this time........just maybe

How could I possibly refuse?

The opportunity to tell a opposition team the major strengths/weaknesses of our squad? Aye, nae bother

Fair enough.

I'd just like to point out though, it's not the despair that kills you, it's the hope.




Are you kidding? If anyone is a lugubrious verbose bullshitter round here it's me!

That said, I can't be arsed. Go for it.

I used to buy programs every game but hardly ever now - they contain next to no news, and certainly no team list. If the average program came thru the door in the mail it would be binned as junk mail - almost all advertising with the odd player profile and managers mutterings. Worst program Ive seen for that was Ross County's last season - fukk all about the match whatsover.

Now you know how the rest of us feel reading your posts.

The difference is that I dont charge for them

Youre out of touch actually. Even my most implacable opponents admit I'm one of their favourite posters

Besides, you dont have to read what I submit - I dont read everything on here and I dont suppose there are many who do. Still, if we get out of this division this season, or more likely Alloa get relegated we wont encounter each others posts too often in the future

Maybe you should start, pay per view

yea, good idea

especially those serials I have with the Ayr mob - better than these shite soaps on telly

Yeah those threads are always well worth a read

I realise you're looking for help from non Raith fans but due to my ability to name at least one player in every squad I reckon I'm something of a second division expert and therefore, the right man for this role.

You could call the piece 'View of the opposition from the South Stand'. Snaapy titles like this are just an example of my petic writing ability.

Yes, but not in a Politically Correct way, it has to be said!

Whoever does it for us, lie. Just in case McGlynn plans to use it as his scouting