Shandon Par Posted February 6, 2018 Share Posted February 6, 2018 22 minutes ago, Bairnardo said: Genuinely shocked no P&B white knight was forthcoming to sort out this dilemma tbh. Adam did ask if she had a spare (tyre) so that was quite helpful. We now know that she remains a size ten despite buying so much chocolate as she uses the chocolate to lure the unsuspecting into her ‘nice’ car. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BallochSonsFan Posted February 6, 2018 Share Posted February 6, 2018 I used to crack one off while looking at the lingerie section of Argos catalogues. When did Argos have a lingerie section?Never has done.That's utter bollocks Throbber. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
throbber Posted February 6, 2018 Share Posted February 6, 2018 When did Argos have a lingerie section?Never has done.That's utter bollocks Throbber. I just mean pics of women in bra and pants. There was also this pic of a woman lying naked on a sun bed and you could make out a bit of her arse crack and I would have a tug to that as well. I remember being raging when my mum threw the catalogue out! 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ICTJohnboy Posted February 6, 2018 Share Posted February 6, 2018 (edited) 50 minutes ago, Lisa Cuddy said: Indeed, but I don't have a jack. Spare is now on but I still need to go to KwikFit to get the burst one repaired and back on. If you hit a kerb with it, it's unlikely to be repairable. (or likely to be irreparable) Edited February 6, 2018 by ICTJohnboy 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jambomo Posted February 6, 2018 Share Posted February 6, 2018 (edited) 17 minutes ago, BallochSonsFan said: When did Argos have a lingerie section? Never has done. That's utter bollocks Throbber. Perhaps the sight of matching cushion sets with curtains gets him going. Edited February 6, 2018 by Jambomo 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Honest_Man#1 Posted February 6, 2018 Share Posted February 6, 2018 1 hour ago, Bairnardo said: Genuinely shocked no P&B white knight was forthcoming to sort out this dilemma tbh. I’m baffled that Zen Archer didn’t sprint from Kirkcaldy tbh. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Distant Doonhamer Posted February 6, 2018 Share Posted February 6, 2018 (edited) People on trains who just never fucking shut up. Now I`m not expecting a silent journey but there`s a woman on the train to London today who must have paused for breath a maximum of 3 times between Leuchars and Newcastle. Endless fucking drivel being spoken at the poor woman opposite her who I don`t think even knows her. Fits perfectly with a description my Granny used to use of someone having been vaccinated with a gramophone needle. Edited February 6, 2018 by Distant Doonhamer 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lisa Cuddy Posted February 6, 2018 Share Posted February 6, 2018 37 minutes ago, ICTJohnboy said: If you hit a kerb with it, it's unlikely to be repairable. (or likely to be irreparable) You're right there. Can't get it replaced until tomorrow now. I now also need to call a plumber as my children insist on arsing about with toilet paper and have blocked the fucking sink with it. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Widge Posted February 6, 2018 Share Posted February 6, 2018 You're right there. Can't get it replaced until tomorrow now. I now also need to call a plumber as my children insist on arsing about with toilet paper and have blocked the fucking sink with it. I’d blame the father tbh... 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lisa Cuddy Posted February 6, 2018 Share Posted February 6, 2018 10 minutes ago, Widge said: I’d blame the father tbh... I usually do, tbf. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shotgun Posted February 6, 2018 Share Posted February 6, 2018 (edited) I mentioned elsewhere that I'm getting laid off and am currently just working out my notice. "Working" in the loosest sense of the word. My last day is the 16th. Last Autumn I did a big project for a client which went so well, we wrapped up a couple of days before the end of the contracted time. I told them that I'd make myself available to assist further if needed but otherwise, we wouldn't bill them for those 2 days. Weeks go by and I hear nothing further until about 2 weeks ago when they asked their Account Manager "Is Shotgun still available to put in some time for us?" As I said, I'd finished the original project so wasn't sure what else they could be looking for at this point. At my direction, she replied with "Yes, he says he'll be happy to help but FYI, he's leaving the company and doesn't have a lot of time left. What is it you need?" Another few days go by, and they ask the same question again. And get the same answer. A few more days, and this is repeated. And again. At this point the Account Manager is reminding them quite forcefully, "Look he's only here for a few more days now, what is it you need him to do?" Finally this morning they tell us that they're wanting to give me an utter shed load of data entry work that they'd overlooked. Far, far more than 2 days worth of work and now critical because they'd left it so long. First of all. No, that isn't even close to what I do. Hire a temp. Second of all. You obviously knew about this at least 2 weeks ago AND you knew I was leaving so if it was so critical, why f**k about for another fortnight instead of telling us at the beginning? Third of all. I've worked for this company for 15 years, only to get cast aside so I'm buggered if I'm going to spent my last few days racing round like a mad b*****d doing hours and hours of menial work just because you couldn't get your shit together. And fourth of all. Feck off. Edited February 6, 2018 by Shotgun 8 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shandon Par Posted February 6, 2018 Share Posted February 6, 2018 34 minutes ago, Shotgun said: I mentioned elsewhere that I'm getting laid off and am currently just working out my notice. "Working" in the loosest sense of the word. My last day is the 16th. Last Autumn I did a big project for a client which went so well, we wrapped up a couple of days before the end of the contracted time. I told them that I'd make myself available to assist further if needed but otherwise, we wouldn't bill them for those 2 days. Weeks go by and I hear nothing further until about 2 weeks ago when they asked their Account Manager "Is Shotgun still available to put in some time for us?" As I said, I'd finished the original project so wasn't sure what else they could be looking for at this point. At my direction, she replied with "Yes, he says he'll be happy to help but FYI, he's leaving the company and doesn't have a lot of time left. What is it you need?" Another few days go by, and they ask the same question again. And get the same answer. A few more days, and this is repeated. And again. At this point the Account Manager is reminding them quite forcefully, "Look he's only here for a few more days now, what is it you need him to do?" Finally this morning they tell us that they're wanting to give me an utter shed load of data entry work that they'd overlooked. Far, far more than 2 days worth of work and now critical because they'd left it so long. First of all. No, that isn't even close to what I do. Hire a temp. Second of all. You obviously knew about this at least 2 weeks ago AND you knew I was leaving so if it was so critical, why f**k about for another fortnight instead of telling us at the beginning? Third of all. I've worked for this company for 15 years, only to get cast aside so I'm buggered if I'm going to spent my last few days racing round like a mad b*****d doing hours and hours of menial work just because you couldn't get your shit together. And fourth of all. Feck off. Shotgun is going to machine gun his office to f**k on his last day, you can sense it brewing. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shotgun Posted February 6, 2018 Share Posted February 6, 2018 37 minutes ago, Shandon Par said: Shotgun is going to machine gun his office to f**k on his last day, you can sense it brewing. Sadly, I don't own a machine gun. Or a leather jacket but I do have some sunglasses somewhere that look a bit like that. I bought them at a petrol station a while back. Maybe I'll just take in some water balloons instead. I may have lived in the USA for almost 25 years but I'm not a complete savage. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
IainMorton Posted February 6, 2018 Share Posted February 6, 2018 Waking up at 6:30 in the morning even though you’re not working... 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Granny Danger Posted February 6, 2018 Share Posted February 6, 2018 1 hour ago, IainMorton said: Waking up at 6:30 in the morning even though you’re not working... How old are you? 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
IainMorton Posted February 6, 2018 Share Posted February 6, 2018 13 minutes ago, Granny Danger said: How old are you? 35, doctor. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Moomintroll Posted February 6, 2018 Share Posted February 6, 2018 Richard "shitbeard" Thompson 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MONKMAN Posted February 7, 2018 Share Posted February 7, 2018 Waking up at 6:30 in the morning even though you’re not working... [emoji20] Get out of bed then, instead of being a layabout. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hedgecutter Posted February 7, 2018 Share Posted February 7, 2018 Crisp packets opened upside down. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rugster Posted February 7, 2018 Share Posted February 7, 2018 I generally have my mobile on silent, except when my daughter's at nursery incase I get a call from them. Someone has set up a facebook messenger group for a load of my family members (it's about something pretty important so I'm not coming out of it) and there are messages coming through almost constantly and with each comes a loud ping. There appears to be no way of switching off this audio alert. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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