Jimboyjones1976 Posted May 30, 2018 Share Posted May 30, 2018 It’s been an interesting few weeks for statements, most of all from Ibrox’s own stand up comedian Dave King. Whilst he keeps one eye firmly on Celtic and the other one on the SPFL and the SFA (which is possible in his case), it made me think............ Could anybody do a better job of writing his statements for him. I mean, he’ll have a pop at just about every club in the league sooner or later so, can YOU reword his statements any better? Bonus points for entertaining writing. The winner being honoured and presented with the Jim Traynor Trophy for literature and fiction. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gkneil Posted May 30, 2018 Share Posted May 30, 2018 Fuduciary Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
10menwent2mow Posted May 31, 2018 Share Posted May 31, 2018 Concomitant Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The_Kincardine Posted May 31, 2018 Share Posted May 31, 2018 7 hours ago, Jimboyjones1976 said: Could anybody do a better job of writing his statements for him. I mean, he’ll have a pop at just about every club in the league sooner or later so, can YOU reword his statements any better? Happy to have a go at this: Quote I read your post with some interest. I note, too, that you hide behind Team:Scotland rather than declaring your own club's personal involvement in this discussion. This is the non-committal attitude we expect from those who scoff from the sidelines. We have the best interests of Scottish football at heart but also respect each club individually. We also, though, want to ensure that the high standards of our game are upheld and that individuals declare themselves rather than hiding behind a mask of anonymity. It is essential that those who comment on our game, and especially our club, are held to the highest ethic of transparency and accountability. We avow this to ourselves and expect it from others. That you fall short in this regard reflects poorly on yourself; especially as your intent is to demean Glasgow Rangers Football Club. Tomorrow we welcome an exciting and creative manager to Ibrox. Someone with a major standing, not only in Scotland, but in world football. A man who has achieved at the highest level. That you fail to honour this and choose, instead, to focus on a few ill chosen words makes you part of the malaise football in Scotland finds itself in. We are a forward-looking club will continue to be so in the face of the naysayers. Not sure if that's a missive from Dave King or from me, though. I guess that's the point of the thread Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JamesM82 Posted May 31, 2018 Share Posted May 31, 2018 This thread beggars belief. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BawWatchin Posted May 31, 2018 Share Posted May 31, 2018 A few keyword/phrase guesses: Cheated Republicans Corruption That particular club British Catholic The Pope The SNP Nicola Sturgeon Celtic I'll go for 7/10. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pittsburgh phil Posted May 31, 2018 Share Posted May 31, 2018 He should try the old Nigerian Prince email tactic..Hello my friend!You have probably heard of me as I am an internationally successful business tycoon! However, due to draconian and baffling legislation in the UK (see statement 1022), I am currently unable to open a bank account in your country (see statement 1023).I have millions just sitting gathering dust here in South Africa which I am dying to put into the GREAT BRITISH economy (see statement 109, subsection 12)! If you love your Queen and your country, as I do, or are even just a fan of Scottish football (see statement 856) then please get in touch. With your account and sort code. We Are (Forever) The People, Yours most sincerely,David King. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Thistle_do_nicely Posted May 31, 2018 Share Posted May 31, 2018 That season ticket money was just resting in my account Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bennett Posted May 31, 2018 Share Posted May 31, 2018 Yet another Sevco thread Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kingjoey Posted May 31, 2018 Share Posted May 31, 2018 2 hours ago, bennett said: Yet another Sevco thread It shows you how much everybody else doesn’t like you.....but luckily, you don’t care. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Greenlantern Posted May 31, 2018 Share Posted May 31, 2018 Something along the lines of; Sadly Glasgow Celtic FC have now accumulated a number of people in various positions of power within our game. This may seem trivial to most, however we at the mighty formerly successful Rangers WATP feel that it completely undermines our rich sense of entitlement. If this continued contamination and undignified avalanche of Scotlands impoverished is allowed to flourish, we at Rangers WATP believe it will thus be generally accepted by the righteous and glorious Presbyterian people of Scotland, and beyond the sovereign state. Therefor we must take a stand against this uprising of overwhelming and disastrous proportions. It only seems like yesterday where we could openly flaunt our traditions and beliefs without condemnation. Let's make Scotland great again! Be a ware and support the berrz! Invest in the club by owning its future. Become a shareholder and buy your piece of history now!!! Or why not just donate, hassle free, and without gain. Safe in the knowledge that you've done your bit. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bennett Posted May 31, 2018 Share Posted May 31, 2018 14 minutes ago, kingjoey said: It shows you how much everybody else doesn’t like you.....but luckily, you don’t care. Some of these threads over the last few days have been hilarious. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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