invergowrie arab Posted July 14, 2017 Share Posted July 14, 2017 25 minutes ago, Helpma said: You've obviously never seen me trying to play cards. Twist Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dee Man Posted July 14, 2017 Share Posted July 14, 2017 Hunt the c**t. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shandon Par Posted July 14, 2017 Share Posted July 14, 2017 I had a love/fan letter from this girl once. Things were not good with my then girlfriend so I called this other girl and popped round for an evening of the old in-out. Next morning she declared that I shouldn't worry about my girlfriend as she was going to have someone kill her (so I could be with this psycho forever more). She didn't of course but I had to talk her out of it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dee Man Posted July 14, 2017 Share Posted July 14, 2017 2 minutes ago, Shandon Par said: I had a love/fan letter from this girl once. Things were not good with my then girlfriend so I called this other girl and popped round for an evening of the old in-out. Next morning she declared that I shouldn't worry about my girlfriend as she was going to have someone kill her (so I could be with this psycho forever more). She didn't of course but I had to talk her out of it. Do you still have her number by any chance? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shandon Par Posted July 14, 2017 Share Posted July 14, 2017 Just now, Dee Man said: Do you still have her number by any chance? When I arrived she showed me she'd had a deck of cards with naked/erect guys on it and the ones who she thought would have cocks that looked like mine she had pinned to her door. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
throbber Posted July 14, 2017 Share Posted July 14, 2017 5 minutes ago, Shandon Par said: When I arrived she showed me she'd had a deck of cards with naked/erect guys on it and the ones who she thought would have cocks that looked like mine she had pinned to her door. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shandon Par Posted July 14, 2017 Share Posted July 14, 2017 Just now, throbber said: She was only ever going to be disappointed, they were all monsters of cock type cocks. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
throbber Posted July 14, 2017 Share Posted July 14, 2017 7 minutes ago, Shandon Par said: She was only ever going to be disappointed, they were all monsters of cock type cocks. Mine is like a toddlers arm holding an apple. Spoiler If looked at through a magnifying glass then enlarged using photoshop. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BFTD Posted July 14, 2017 Share Posted July 14, 2017 Married pensioner (sexually) knocks off a 28 year old on the side, then tries to (fatally) knock off his missus, and their relationship is an "open question"? This guy's boaby must produce the secret of eternal life. And vibrate. And play lullabies for afters. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Blootoon87 Posted July 14, 2017 Share Posted July 14, 2017 The whole thing seems seedy, even with those professional escorts you hear about. In all the times in my life i've been wanting my hole, which sadly there have been many, i can honestly say that i've never once considered paying for it. Look at Mr 'I'm too good for prostitutes!'Must be lonely in your ivory tower. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
throbber Posted July 14, 2017 Share Posted July 14, 2017 1 minute ago, Bairnardo said: You could whip toads out a pond with mine I seriously don't know if this means large or small here. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
EdgarusQPFC Posted July 14, 2017 Share Posted July 14, 2017 3 minutes ago, Blootoon87 said: Look at Mr 'I'm too good for prostitutes!' Must be lonely in your ivory tower. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HMFC Mitchy Posted July 14, 2017 Share Posted July 14, 2017 7 minutes ago, Bairnardo said: You could whip toads out a pond with mine Like a lasso, or as bait? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
EdgarusQPFC Posted July 14, 2017 Share Posted July 14, 2017 2 hours ago, Hillonearth said: Ditto. A few of us were over in Amsterdam for somebody's 30th a while back - one of my (ostensibly happily married) pals who was over decided as I was single at the time we were going to do a bit of "window shopping" together. Told him I just wasn't into the idea, but got the full-scale "C'mon.. I'll do it if you do it..." routine. I suspect he eventually sloped off on his own to achieve his mission. There's a world full of burds out there giving free samples if you play your cards right. Why pay? Was stuck in a awful art class back in secondary school and the only other lad in the class and i used to talk to kill time during the classes, wasn't a particularly interesting lad but it was better than sitting quietly. One day during chat he proudly tells me about out at the weekend his big brother paid a prostitute to blow both the brother and himself, he seemed really chuffed with himself over this revelation but all i could think was "you let a lassie blow you immediately after finishing your brother?" Fucking rank Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GordonD Posted July 14, 2017 Share Posted July 14, 2017 2 hours ago, throbber said: Don't want my girlfriend finding out. I can see how it would be embarrassing if you picked up a prossie and it turned out to be her. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
EdgarusQPFC Posted July 14, 2017 Share Posted July 14, 2017 4 minutes ago, GordonD said: I can see how it would be embarrassing if you picked up a prossie and it turned out to be her. And not even offer him a discount Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NotThePars Posted July 14, 2017 Share Posted July 14, 2017 Fair play to the guy who's advertising his services as a hitman being a grass and also not being arrested for advertising his services as a hitman. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
throbber Posted July 14, 2017 Share Posted July 14, 2017 18 minutes ago, EdgarusQPFC said: And not even offer him a discount A discount for lasting all of 45 seconds. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
welshbairn Posted July 14, 2017 Share Posted July 14, 2017 1 hour ago, throbber said: Mine is like a toddlers arm holding an apple. 1 hour ago, Bairnardo said: You could whip toads out a pond with mine So it's true that midgets have massive cocks? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Swordfishtrombone Posted July 14, 2017 Share Posted July 14, 2017 Not the usual crime you would find on the Jasmine Allen Estate. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Archived
This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.