Jump to content

Fathers day gift thread


Recommended Posts

59 minutes ago, NorthernJambo said:

Got f**k all*

*I've no kids.
Sent my old man a card, it'll be late.

Maybe if you were considerate to others you might get your hole.

 

Just a thought.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Replies 62
  • Created
  • Last Reply
2 minutes ago, NorthernJambo said:


Sounds like more effort than it's worth tbh

It is... getting your hole is great but once it moves on to relationships, moving in, kids, having the face chewed off you for going to the match and/or the pub, getting dragged round fucking shops etc it all becomes futile and instantly regrettable.

Porn on the other hand...  

Link to comment
Share on other sites

15 minutes ago, Flybhoy said:

It is... getting your hole is great but once it moves on to relationships, moving in, kids, having the face chewed off you for going to the match and/or the pub, getting dragged round fucking shops etc it all becomes futile and instantly regrettable.

Porn on the other hand...  

Reminds me of that classic joke;

Jeremy Beadle had a small cock but on the other hand.... 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

KIDS: Give your father the best Father's Day present he could ask for by fucking the f**k off for ten hours with your mum.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

29 minutes ago, Gaz said:

KIDS: Give your father the best Father's Day present he could ask for by fucking the f**k off for ten hours with your mum.

Cynical.  I took my three 'up London' last night then cooked kedgree for an early lunch before they fucked off back to their maw's.  Happy daze.  Kids are brilliant.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Just now, The_Kincardine said:

Cynical.  I took my three 'up London' last night then cooked kedgree for an early lunch before they fucked off back to their maw's.  Happy daze.  Kids are brilliant.

I love my kids to bits. But by f**k they're hard going.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Just now, Gaz said:

I love my kids to bits. But by f**k they're hard going.

Then get divorced.  You know when their maw says something like, "You only like your faither because he doesn't nag"?  This can be true every day of the week.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

8 minutes ago, The_Kincardine said:

Then get divorced.  You know when their maw says something like, "You only like your faither because he doesn't nag"?  This can be true every day of the week.

Tempted. But my wife's good in the sack, so she gets a pass for now.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

It's​ my first father's day and it was class.

I ended up with matching dad and daughter t-shirts, which we wore until she bottled it and spewed down herself so she had to be changed, and tickets to see Jason Isbell and the 400 Unit in October which will be magic because her mum and I get to leave her with her granny and granda for a night and try and remember what a full night's sleep felt like.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Archived

This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.

  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    • No registered users viewing this page.
×
×
  • Create New...