Audaces Fortuna Juvat Posted December 12, 2017 Share Posted December 12, 2017 1 minute ago, KnightswoodBear said: This is probably more "Things I do to infuriate my partner" but the fact I can pack for a 2 week holiday in about 5 minutes bugs the piss out of my wife. She had a huge array of, "stuff I might need", laid out on her dressing table well before I had even thought about printing the boarding passes. She is by and large great, but sometimes she is batshit crazy. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KnightswoodBear Posted December 12, 2017 Share Posted December 12, 2017 1 minute ago, Audaces Fortuna Juvat said: She had a huge array of, "stuff I might need", laid out on her dressing table well before I had even thought about printing the boarding passes. She is by and large great, but sometimes she is batshit crazy. "Are you not going to take a nice shirt in case we go out?" - No "What about a pair of trousers?" - It's going to be 30 degrees the entire time we're there, so no. "What about shower gel and shaving foam?" - I'm sure they'll sell it there etc, etc 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
smpar Posted December 12, 2017 Share Posted December 12, 2017 1 hour ago, Shandon Par said: Karma. I broke up with a girl on Christmas Day once (though it took until Boxing Day for it to sink in to her head I was serious). Cost me a small fortune from Majestic Wine in Dutch courage beforehand to get the job done. She better have been an utter c**t, otherwise you're a horrible, heartless b*****d. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
welshbairn Posted December 12, 2017 Share Posted December 12, 2017 2 minutes ago, Audaces Fortuna Juvat said: She had a huge array of, "stuff I might need", laid out on her dressing table well before I had even thought about printing the boarding passes. She is by and large great, but sometimes she is batshit crazy. They seem to forget that there are shops abroad. You don't need to cover every possible eventuality like you're trekking to the South Pole. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Audaces Fortuna Juvat Posted December 12, 2017 Share Posted December 12, 2017 Just now, welshbairn said: They seem to forget that there are shops abroad. You don't need to cover every possible eventuality like you're trekking to the South Pole. I'm past trying to tell her this after over 20 years. Especially when we are going for short breaks in places like Germany and Holland. Not exactly the far east and a new culture? 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shandon Par Posted December 12, 2017 Share Posted December 12, 2017 2 minutes ago, NJ2 said: One day you roasters will see the light. I look forward to each of you apologising in due course. IS have yet to invent a method of execution gruesome enough for you. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shandon Par Posted December 12, 2017 Share Posted December 12, 2017 4 minutes ago, smpar said: She better have been an utter c**t, otherwise you're a horrible, heartless b*****d. So many break-ups happen at Christmas. People who don't really like each other forced to spend time with each other. Add in huge amounts of booze and it can be a rough time. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NJ2 Posted December 12, 2017 Share Posted December 12, 2017 Drown him in a big vat of melted Lurpak Slighty Salted, Live on Al-Jazeera. We’d have died of old age before that block of butter melted. Drowning in melted butter though, doesn’t sound a bad way to go tbh 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NJ2 Posted December 12, 2017 Share Posted December 12, 2017 So many break-ups happen at Christmas. People who don't really like each other forced to spend time with each other. Add in huge amounts of booze and it can be a rough time. If that makes you feel better about the whole scenario fair enough but I think it’s clear who the bad guy is here 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
parsforlife Posted December 12, 2017 Share Posted December 12, 2017 Didn't realise people under 70 would genuinely use lurpack given a choice 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
welshbairn Posted December 12, 2017 Share Posted December 12, 2017 1 minute ago, parsforlife said: Didn't even realise people under 70 would genuinely use lurpack Anal's not just for the elderly. 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shandon Par Posted December 12, 2017 Share Posted December 12, 2017 17 minutes ago, parsforlife said: Didn't realise people under 70 would genuinely use lurpack given a choice There will be plenty of room in this vat of boiling Lurpak for you too. Fry the infidels I say. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brother Blades Posted December 12, 2017 Share Posted December 12, 2017 This is probably more "Things I do to infuriate my partner" but the fact my butler can pack my bags for a 2 week holiday in about 5 minutes bugs the piss out of my wife. FTFY 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Girth Posted December 12, 2017 Share Posted December 12, 2017 Sometimes my right hand gets tired. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
throbber Posted December 12, 2017 Share Posted December 12, 2017 It's not scare tactics it's human biology. The sleep deprivation now is preparing you for when it actually arrives. Both myself and my girlfriend were angel children who slept solidly at night without waking our parents up. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shandon Par Posted December 12, 2017 Share Posted December 12, 2017 4 minutes ago, throbber said: Both myself and my girlfriend were angel children who slept solidly at night without waking our parents up. Your parents have simply erased the horrors from their memories. I was so awful the child psychologist asked my folks “how do you put up with him?”, such was my terrible behaviour and refusal to sleep. Turned out okay though once I got to about 7. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
coprolite Posted December 12, 2017 Share Posted December 12, 2017 last night's walking dead "mid season finale" had four plots coming together over several locations with added flashbacks.the questions started pretty early and innocuously enough but i was soon about two minutes behind and struggling to hear enough to keep up myself."who's that?", "why are they doing that?", "where did they come from?"she wasn't even trying to think. at one point she asked "which king?". There's only one, i explained tactfully and patiently. cue her stomping out and going to bed. result. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sweet Pete Posted December 12, 2017 Share Posted December 12, 2017 1 hour ago, coprolite said: last night's walking dead "mid season finale" had four plots coming together over several locations with added flashbacks. the questions started pretty early and innocuously enough but i was soon about two minutes behind and struggling to hear enough to keep up myself. "who's that?", "why are they doing that?", "where did they come from?" she wasn't even trying to think. at one point she asked "which king?". There's only one, i explained tactfully and patiently. cue her stomping out and going to bed. result. A real bugbear of mine. She seems patently unable to follow anything but the most simple and conventional storyline. To the point that she's unwilling to watch anything with me that isn't totally formulaic. Also won't watch any "gangster films", and this could be literally any crime thriller / drama. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shandon Par Posted December 12, 2017 Share Posted December 12, 2017 4 minutes ago, Sweet Pete said: A real bugbear of mine. She seems patently unable to follow anything but the most simple and conventional storyline. To the point that she's unwilling to watch anything with me that isn't totally formulaic. Also won't watch any "gangster films", and this could be literally any crime thriller / drama. Sounds like you need to alter her perception in advance. Eg. LA Confidential - a love triangle tale with hunky young Russell Crowe and Colin Farrell. Snatch - Brad Pitt in a gentle tale of a man who love dogs, caravans and his mum. The two box sets of Gomorra - an Italian family drama. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rugster Posted December 12, 2017 Share Posted December 12, 2017 5 minutes ago, Shandon Par said: Sounds like you need to alter her perception in advance. Eg. LA Confidential - a love triangle tale with hunky young Russell Crowe and Colin Farrell. Snatch - Brad Pitt in a gentle tale of a man who love dogs, caravans and his mum. The two box sets of Gomorra - an Italian family drama. Dags 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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