DA Baracus Posted November 23, 2020 Share Posted November 23, 2020 (edited) 16 minutes ago, Genuine Hibs Fan said: As this is a place that is one of the reliable good natured and supportive lights on here, I don't think bringing in the most interminable debates that occur on the site is a very good idea tbh. Fwiw, obvious dotting accounts should be banned, and if folk feel they are being bullied they should speak to mods. I don't think it's fair that people who regularly speak to and of others with contempt on here (not that that covers everyone) are talking about bullying, and short of either people explaining every dot they give (patently ridiculous as an idea) or removing the rep system (seems unlikely), there isn't a solution. Even if we accept that people are going around dotting all of someone's posts, I don't see any instances where it hasn't been initiated by some pretty direct exchanges of words. To say that dotting is bullying is stretching it massively imo, and I'd doubt it's ever a one way street. Again though, if people feel otherwise in specific circumstances they should speak to the mods or, even, PM the person involved and tell them how it makes them feel; maybe have a bit of a grown up conversation about things, get some closure or productive conversation out of the whole thing. Or idk we could call them bullies while referring to others as cretins, virgins, no mates, c***s etc because it makes us feel better. As I say, not the place for this chat and I'll not be responding but it's not something that should sit unchallenged. Except no one has said that. It has been said that doing it to someone repeatedly when you knowingly get a reaction is bullying. Maybe the person on the receiving end has done something shit or has annoyed the person doing it. Perhaps they should be speaking to the mods about it, not a bad shout. You're obviously referring to myself regarding speaking about others regularly with contempt, but that's not actually true. I have said some things before, most of which I regret, but some I don't. I don't chuck about insults every other post though. Someone had to go 5 years back to get examples of it. Hardly a pattern. If you take all of my posts, it's going to be less than 1% of them that do it. I don't follow specific folk round the forum calling them names to try and get a reaction, so it's not the same thing. Both can be wrong however. Perhaps you have a point about the name calling though, so I'll take that in to account and cool it down. Yes, fair point about the other thread not being the place for it, so I've replied here. Edited November 23, 2020 by DA Baracus -2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DA Baracus Posted November 23, 2020 Share Posted November 23, 2020 I think Genuine Hibs Fan is right regarding not taking the 'discussion' to the other thread, so I'll post here what he's replying to and delete it from the other thread. 1 hour ago, DA Baracus said: Sad to say but the 'Heads Gone' thread shows a total lack of understanding that some things that seem silly and daft (and don't have an effect on most of us) to the majority of folk can really get to people. People with mental illness can be irked by things that most other folk wouldn't think twice about. I fear that I'm risking ruining this thread given the deluge of responses that will follow, but the point I was trying to make isn't that giving a red dot is bullying, or indeed that anything is wrong with doing so. Continually red dotting a poster to try and get a reaction is close to it, but doing so when you know it gets to them then tips over in to bullying. No matter how much you try to trivialise it and downplay that it's just a coloured dot or whatever stock phrase you wish to use to try and justify it, people are doing a thing that, in some cases, they know is getting to someone else. That's a standard definition of bullying. Plenty of people have deliberately missed this point over on that thread. I will repeat, so that when they deliberately miss the point here we know who they are: there's nothing wrong with red dotting posts in general, but continually doing it to certain posters, regardless of content, is trying to get a reaction from them, and there are some cases where the people doing it get the desired reaction, and in those cases that is bullying. My point originally was simply to consider this, and maybe please not target folk who you know it gets to (although then that takes away the point I suppose). No, I'm not referring to myself, so those with the tragic alias accounts can dot away, but I'd please ask that you don't derail this thread. Take this to the 'Heads Gone' thread and quote if there if you wish, and roll out the standard responses that deliberately miss the point and make claims that no one has actually said, dig up posts from from 5 years ago as if they are in any way relevant and do whatever tragic other nonsense you want to try and deflect and deny, but please, don't derail this thread, as it's brilliant for so many folk on here. Summary: - Red dots are trivial and most folk don't get bothered by them - Some folk do though. The nature of mental illness means some people can get annoyed by what most others see as daft wee things. This applies to folk who don't suffer from mental illness as well - You don't get to decide what does and does not bother/irritate/irk someone. - Red dotting is fine. In general it isn't bullying. - Red dotting every post you see of a poster to try and get a reaction is a bit of a dick move, but most folk aren't bothered by this. However, why are you trying to wind up strangers? - Some folk though are bothered by it. If you continue to target them, knowing that there are bothered, you are a bully. Why are you doing this? - Yes, I've said some shit things on this forum in the past. I regret most of them. However what I've said in the past is totally irrelevant to the point I was making. I'm not a mod mind, so I have no say in the running of this site. I'm not asking for the dotting system to be removed. I just want folk to consider the impact they might have on someone by continually trying to get a reaction from them. -2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GordonD Posted November 23, 2020 Share Posted November 23, 2020 23 minutes ago, DA Baracus said: Except no one has said that. It has been said that doing it to someone repeatedly when you knowingly get a reaction is bullying. Maybe the person on the receiving end has done something shit or has annoyed the person doing it. Perhaps they should be speaking to the mods about it, not a bad shout. It could be argued that the slagging-off that throbber gets on a daily basis amounts to bullying, especially when you add in the comments about Mrs. t. However, he seems to be taking it in good spirit as so far he hasn't taken his ball and gone home. I know I've done it myself but it's all meant in jest and I assume he knows that. As for red dotting, I take that to mean that you disagree with a particular post, which is everybody's right. Automatically red-dotting one person's posts, regardless of what they say, is a different matter. I'll be disappointed if somebody doesn't red dot this, just for a laugh. -6 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GordonD Posted November 23, 2020 Share Posted November 23, 2020 Knew you wouldn't let me down, guys! -2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MuckleMoo Posted November 23, 2020 Share Posted November 23, 2020 People who are emotionally affected by being downvoted, why don't you ask the moderating team to have an option to remove the voting system from people who do not wish to deal with it. That way you will no longer have people upvote or down vote you, but in return you cannot upvote or down vote anyone else. I mean if you are getting a shed load of upvotes, its a bit of a worry sign that some people cannot take some negative opinions. Then the heads gone thread can get back to meltdowns by Clyde fans. Because currently its a self indulgent, tear stained, wankfest. The other option would be to use the app/tapatalk, you can only see and give greenies. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bully Wee Villa Posted November 23, 2020 Share Posted November 23, 2020 Reading through the last few pages, fucking Hell. The forum is very loosely moderated, we generally trust people to mind their own behaviour. I don't really give too much of a toss if people want to engage in dotting wars and both parties are at it. Don't really see the point myself, but each to their own. However, when people have explicitly said that being singled out upsets them, it seems that it would be sensible to stop. After all, I don't think people on here really want to make other posters' lives worse, do they? I'm not singling anyone out or taking sides, but please can posters consider their behaviour, even more so given the current global situation with lots of people feeling isolated. So, basically, tl;dr. Just don't be dicks to each other unless you're sure the recipient doesn't care. And... I think this thread has run its course. 10 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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