Jump to content

Modern shite patter


Hampden Diehard

Recommended Posts

On 11/15/2016 at 11:08, Bairnardo said:

To be classed as a drinking session, I would say you have to be drinking for a minimum of 12 hours. And it has to be in a pub. Not sitting in someones house playing fifa and eating dominos before a taxi into town at 2330. No siree.

That's how I class it too.

I've seen me go out for a Saturday lunchtime game with the #lads, and still be in the same pub at 9 when the #burds start to appear.  Drinking fucking all sorts as well we were; pints, double vods, shots, champagne to celebrate someone winning an acca.  Then you move around the pubs/clubs until 2 or 3 in the morning.  And spending circa £200 in the process. That's a sesh IMO.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

On 16/11/2016 at 22:53, mrcat1990 said:

The "Lee Wallace is a grass" patter has had the absolute f**k booted out of it. Was funny enough first twenty times but bazillionth is tiresome.

Shite patter thread for this pish.

 

Oh.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • 2 weeks later...
On ‎17‎/‎11‎/‎2016 at 16:25, TheScarf said:

That's how I class it too.

I've seen me go out for a Saturday lunchtime game with the #lads, and still be in the same pub at 9 when the #burds start to appear.  Drinking fucking all sorts as well we were; pints, double vods, shots, champagne to celebrate someone winning an acca.  Then you move around the pubs/clubs until 2 or 3 in the morning.  And spending circa £200 in the process. That's a sesh IMO.

Can't tell if your being ironic here or not seeing as this is the shite modern patter thread...

Edited by irvine_buddie
Link to comment
Share on other sites

On ‎17‎/‎11‎/‎2016 at 16:25, TheScarf said:

That's how I class it too.

I've seen me go out for a Saturday lunchtime game with the #lads, and still be in the same pub at 9 when the #burds start to appear.  Drinking fucking all sorts as well we were; pints, double vods, shots, champagne to celebrate someone winning an acca.  Then you move around the pubs/clubs until 2 or 3 in the morning.  And spending circa £200 in the process. That's a sesh IMO.

Good shout re "burds".

Slight point of order though as it's shite 1970's patter...

Link to comment
Share on other sites

28 minutes ago, Bold Rover said:

Any successful ones?

Hi, this is Dee Woman here, I have just logged into my late husband's account to let you know he was successful on his fourth attempt. I hope you are happy.

Thank you.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

7 minutes ago, Dee Man said:

Hi, this is Dee Woman here, I have just logged into my late husband's account to let you know he was successful on his fourth attempt. I hope you are happy.

Thank you.

Hi Dee Woman, sorry for your loss, when you find the time could you PM me a photo of your good self in a state of undress, if you are shy, just the tits will do.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

57 minutes ago, Zen Archer said:

Hi Dee Woman, sorry for your loss, when you find the time could you PM me a photo of your good self in a state of undress, if you are shy, just the tits will do.

Sorry Mr Archer, but I am in the funeral parlour so whapping them out for a selfie would be slightly inappropriate. However I have a picture saved to my phone that you might like. 

Do you like hairless twats/baldy c***s?

images (16).jpg

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

Loading...
  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    • No registered users viewing this page.
×
×
  • Create New...